Destiny: Politics, Free Speech, Controversy, Sex, War, and Relationships | Lex Fridman Podcast #337 | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Destiny: Politics, Free Speech, Controversy, Sex, War, and Relationships | Lex Fridman Podcast #337".


Note: This transcription is split and grouped by topics and subtopics. You can navigate through the Table of Contents on the left. It's interactive. All paragraphs are timed to the original video. Click on the time (e.g., 01:53) to jump to the specific portion of the video.


Intro (00:00)

If you have a democratic style of governance, you are entrusting people with one of the most awesome and radical of responsibilities. And that's saying that you're going to pick the people that are gonna make some of the hardest decisions in all of human history. If you're gonna trust people to vote correctly, you have to be able to trust them to have open and honest dialogue with each other. Whether that's Nazis or KKK people or whoever talking, you have to believe that your people are going to be able to rise above and make the correct determinations when they hear these types of speeches. And if you're so worried that somebody's gonna hear a certain political figure and they're gonna be completely radicalized instantly, then what that tells me is that you don't have enough faith in humans for democracy to be a viable institution. Which is fine, you can be anti-democratic, but I don't think you can be pro-democracy and anti-free speech. - The following is a conversation with Stephen Benel, also known online as Destiny. He's a video game streamer and political commentator, one of the early pioneers of both live streaming in general and live streamed political debate in this course. Politically, he is a progressive. Identifying is either left or far left, depending on your perspective. There are many reasons I wanted to talk to Stephen. First, I just talked to Ben Shapiro, and many people have told me that Stephen is the Ben Shapiro of the left, in terms of political perspective and exceptional debate skills. Second reason is he skillfully defends some nuanced, non-standard views. At the same time, being pro-establishment, pro-institutions and pro-biden, while also being pro-capitalism and pro-free speech. Third reason is he has been there at the beginning and throughout the meteoric rise of the video game, "Live Streaming Community." In some mainstream circles, this community is not taken seriously. Perhaps because of its demographic distribution skewing young, or perhaps because of the sometimes harsh style of communication. But I think this community should be taken seriously and shown respect. Millions of young minds tune into live streams like destinies to question and to try to understand what is going on with the world, often exploring challenging even controversial ideas. The language is sometimes harsher and the humor sometimes meter than I would prefer. But I, grandpa Lex, put on my rain boots and went into the beautiful chaotic muck of online discourse and have so far survived to tell the tale with a smile and even more love in my heart than before. On top of all this, we were lucky to have Melina Gorrinson, a popular streamer and world traveler, join us at the end of the conversation. You can check out her channel on and you can check out Steven's channel on This is the Lex Friedman podcast. To support it, please check out our sponsors in the description. And now, dear friends, here's Destiny.

Dialogue And Debate Insights

Dialogue Skills (03:05)

- I don't know if you watched me watching your yay interview. - Yeah, thank you so much for. - I'm so curious, when you're navigating a conversation like that, are you, how intentional is the thought process between building rapport and pushing and giving a little, let it like-- - Zero, zero, intention. I was watching and thank you so much. It was very kind for you to review that conversation. It meant a lot that you were complimentary parts on the technical aspects of the conversation, but no, zero. And I'm actually deliberately trying to avoid, I think you've called it debate brain, which is just another flavor of thinking about like the meta conversation, trying to optimize how should this conversation go? Because I feel like the more you do that, the better you get at that, the less human connection you have. Like the less genuinely you're actually sitting there in the moment and listening to the person, you're more like calculating what's the right thing to say versus like feeling, what is that person feeling right now? What are they thinking? That's what I'm trying to do is like putting myself in their mind and thinking, what does the world look like to them? What does the world feel like to them? And so from that, I truly try to listen. Now I'm also learning, especially because Rogan and others have been giving me shit for not pushing back. It's good sometimes to say from a place of care for the other human being to say, stop. What did you just say? I don't think that represents who you are and what you really mean. Or maybe if it does at that time, represents who they are, I could see a better world if they grow into a different direction and try to point that direction out to them. - There's a really complicated dance between letting somebody share their full story versus letting somebody like, essentially, I guess like proselytize your audience. And it's like, okay, hold on, let's take a minute here. But yeah, I used to be four or five years ago, it was attack, attack, attack, attack, attack, attack, whatever you said. And now I'm leaning way more towards the like, okay, well, tell me how you feel about everything and then we'll go from there. So a lot of people like my new approach, some older fans will watch and they're like, why are you letting this guy just ramble on? You know, we said like five or six wrong things and you're only gonna call them on two of them. And it's like, it's different styles of conversation. But yeah. - Do you do a lot of research beforehand too? - Depending on the conversation. Yeah. So if we're gonna talk like vaccines and stuff, yeah, that's a ton of reading and stuff that I never thought I'd know going into it. If it's a more personal like political philosophy conversation, there's not as much you can prepare for just. It truly depends on the conversation. - How much are you actually listening to the other person? - I'm always listening. You have to listen. Cause as soon as you stop listening, the quality of everything falls apart. The connection disappears, the quality of the conversation disappears. But my natural inclination is to just be way more aggressive than normal. So I have to constantly remind myself, I guess you would call it a meta conversation. And you're like, okay, he's probably saying this because of that or we'll let him go here and then we'll stop later. But yeah. Cause my preferred style of conversation is like, I'm gonna talk and the second I say something you disagree with, then let's iron it out. Right? I think in like syllogisms, like, okay, here's premise A. Good? Okay. Premise B, okay. And then conclusion. And then as long as we're both deductively sound, we're not crazy, no psychosis, then we're gonna agree on everything. Whereas other people like to, most people think in stories, like narratives, like a whole, there's a whole narrative and the individual facts don't matter as much cause they'll pick and choose what they want. And it's really hard cause everybody thinks narrative so I have to function in that world. But it's frustrating for me sometimes.

Good Arguing vs being stuck (06:34)

- Well, I've seen you've had a lot of excellent debates. One of them I just recently last night watch is on systemic racism. And it's the first time I've seen you completely lose your shit. - Oh shoot, who was that against? - I'm not sure exactly, but you were just very frustrated and sorry, not lose your shit, but you were frustrated constantly because of the thing, let's lay out one, two, three. And every time you try to lay it out, it would falter. I think it had to do with sort of, can you use data to make an argument or do you need to use a study that doesn't interpretation of that data? And then there's like this tension between, I think this is a behavioral economist that you were talking to. The point is you do this kind of nice layout that the whole point of behavioral economics that says there's more to it than just the data. You have to give a context and like do the rich, rigorous interpretation in the context of the full human story. And then there was like a dance back and forth. Sometimes you use data, sometimes not. And you're getting really frustrated. - Found. - And shutting down. And so that felt like a failure mode. I've seen Sam Harris have similar sticking points. Like if we can't agree on the terminology, we can't go on. To me, I feel like sort of the Wiggenstein perspective is like, I think if you get stuck on any one thing, you're just not gonna make progress. You have to, part of the conversation has to be about doing a good dance together versus being dogmatically stuck on the path to truth. I think the true challenge is identifying what of those sticking points are important versus what is not important. So like if I'm having an argument with somebody about like Jewish representation and media, they might be like a big conversation and they might say a couple things. Like I think Jewish people, you know, they tend to help their own or whatever and saying, "Yeah, okay." But like for the purpose of the conversation, we can keep moving. But if they casually drop like, you know, yeah. I think that's why the Holocaust numbers were blown up from like 100,000 to 6 million. And that's why I was like, okay, well, hold on, wait, if you think this, we have to stop here because this is gonna be, it's not just a language game in this part. If you really believe this fact, then the whole rest of the conversation is gonna be informed by that. But if you know. - And it has to be something that doesn't bother you personally. You have to step outside your own ego. So Holocaust denial is somebody that would bother a lot of people. And there's some things just observing you. I feel like when you get really good at conversation, you can become a stickler to, you might have your favorite terms that really bothers you if people don't agree on those terms. - Thanks the question. You mean raising the question. Yeah, you should just want, people say stuff, I just let it slide, yeah. You can't, 'cause if you fight, when you're having a conversation with somebody and you're talking to their audience at the same time, 'cause that's really what's happening. You never wanna come off as over combative or over aggressive because it puts people in like, there's like a trigger in your brain. And this is true of relationships, the friendships of persuasive rhetoric or whatever. There's a trigger in the brain. And as soon as that defensive trigger gets like flipped on, everything is over. You've lost the ability to persuade because everything becomes a fight at that point. - Yeah.

Destinys political evolution (09:39)

Well, I wanted to talk to you, 'cause I heard somewhere that you were referred to as the Ben Shapiro of the Left. And since I'm talking with Ben as well, I wanted to sort of complete spiritually this platonic political philosophy puzzle in my head. You are a progressive, but a progressive with many non-standard progressive views. And you had a heck of a fascinating journey through all of that. And like I said, I think you argue with passions sometimes with excessive amounts of passion. - That's a really polite way of saying that. - Almost always with good faith and with rigor, with seriousness. I asked on your subreddit, which is an excellent subreddit. Shout out to the Destiny subreddit. So much, at least for that particular post. What I really loved is when I asked for questions for you, there were like, holy shit, there's adults and they're like, let's all behave. Like nobody say incest. I was like, what? What's going on here? But actually the questions that rose to the top were really good. So somebody said that Destiny was speaking of your journey was a conservative in his early teens. Then he became a libertarian. Then he became a left-wing social justice warrior. Then he flirted with socialism. And now he is a social Democrat liberal. I've also heard you refer to yourself as a far left person. So to the degree there's truth to that journey, can you take me through your evolution through the landscape of political ideologies that you went through? - So my dad comes from Kentucky and my mom is a Cuban immigrant. Cubans are notorious for being very conservative in the United States for historical reasons and for other reasons. But my upbringing was a very Republican one. I grew up listening to Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, Michael Savage on the radio, Billy Cunningham. I think Sean Hannity a little bit later on, like that was like my whole upbringing politically. I remember I was writing, I'd written like articles per the school journal like in favor of defending the war in Iraq and you know, defending Bush from all the criticism, et cetera. So that was my upbringing. I think once I hit high school college, I had my edgy like libertarian-esque high school phase of like reading Ayn Rand, of figuring out that like, oh my God, nothing in life matters except for class and money. That's actually the answer to everything. And I got to college, I became a Ron Paul fan, very big Ron Paul fan. And then from there, I kind of work to life, life happens at the kind of the lowest point of my life in terms of where I'm working. Financially everything is like kind of in ruin in my life. There's a whole bunch of dumb stuff that's happened. Probably my most conservative point. I don't know what it is about like being poor and thinking like you can work your way out of it, you can do whatever. It's just my upbringing is always just like, if you're not having financial successes, work, work, work, work, work. And then I got into streaming, very, very lucky break. Everything just lined up at the right time. And then as I've progressed through streaming, I would say through the years, I've gradually fallen more and more to the left, especially once my kid turned four, five, six years old. And I started to see like how much different his life was just because of the financial opportunities that I was able to provide for him through no merit of his own. And that started to radically change how I viewed the world in a lot of ways. So actually let's like linger on that.

Low Points in Life When Trying to Stream (12:52)

Yeah. Low point. You worked at McDonald's, you worked at Casino, you did carpet cleaning, what was the D lowest point? Definitely the carpet cleaning. Really? Absolutely. Why was it the lowest point? That's when you were just starting streaming. My whole life has been a series of lucky breaks, really truly. I grew up playing a lot of video games, but back in my day, our day, you had to read, there was a lot of text on the screen. Back in my day, we used to play-- They did not talk to you. Yeah, because nowadays everything's voice acted, but back then you'd have to read a lot. I was a really good reader and a really good vocab player. Yeah, how did you actually say that? What games were we talking about? What do you mean just reading? You're talking about like RPG? Yeah, JRPG. So like Final Fantasy Games, Fantasy Stars, like any RPG that would have been on the SNES, Sega, PlayStation, these are the things that-- Let's pause on that. Okay.

Elder Scrolls (13:43)

I just talked to Todd Howard, who's of the Elder Scrolls fame and the Fallout fame and beyond what's your thoughts on Elder Scrolls? Why Skyrim the greatest RPG of all time? Man, I really don't like Skyrim or Fallout. You don't love it. Oh, really? No, not at all. Why do you hate Skyrim? Yeah, so I really like characters and like compelling stories and narratives around those characters. And I like to see them kind of like grow and change, kind of like a movie or a story. So in your like Final Fantasy games, you've got characters. There are a lot of like classical tropes of like a character starts off kind of like edgy, angsty all on their own. They develop relationships, friendships. They realize that the life is more about themselves and they do that. And I like that growth. That's kind of what you see in all of those old role-playing games. I didn't like the open world ones as much because your main character is just like a blank slate, never talks. It's for you to like project on too. But there's not the same like linear narrative of like growth for the character. Oh, this is fascinating. There's the actual story arc to the character that's more crafted in a beautiful way by the designers of the game. Yeah. I don't think one is better or worse.

Not So Unique Conversations (14:50)

I tend towards like, I want to hear a compelling story around like a set of characters that like grow and change this again. Oh, that's beautifully put then. Yeah, I just really loved being able to leave the town. You go outside the town and you look outside, it's nature and the world of possibilities is before you. You do whatever the fuck you want. I mean, that immensity of just being lost in the world is really immersive for me. But yeah, you're right. Whatever attracts you about a world. So you were just starting to play video games. You go up play video games, that's one of your lucky breaks. There's just like a lot of random skills you pick up depending on the type of game you play. I played a lot of tech space games on the computer. So I was a very fast typeer. I'm still a very fast typeer. Read a lot, you know, learn weird kind of math stuff for some of the calculations, some of the games. I think I'm pretty good at getting information, figuring stuff out, learning patterns, all of that. And then that plus the reading and everything the games meant that I don't want to say I excelled in school because my grades were pretty bad. But I was in like all honors, all AP classes or whatever. A lot of dual enrollment, a lot of AP credit going into college. So I did pretty well in school, probably better than I should have. But it was because I had the game stuff that was like really powering a lot of my brain there while I was trying to sleep through class. Yeah. So you're able to soak in information, integrate it, quickly take notes. Generally, I think I'm pretty good at that. Well, you do this a lot when you stream your typing stuff. Is there a system in that note taking? And what do you use for note taking? Does it matter? I use a notepad. Like notepad. The original. Yeah, notepad.exe, not the plus plus, not. Is there genius to the madness behind that? Or you just don't give a shit? No, I mean, it's going to depend on the style of conversation. If I'm with somebody that is very meticulously organized their thoughts and they are a finite better word here for a rambler, you can edit that in better word for rambler. Just somebody that talks a lot and a lot, I'll start taking notes, bullet points, like this, this, this, this, this, this, because there's a style of conversation where I say seven or eight different things. And then when you go to respond to everything, I said, I cut you off immediately and we argue that point. But if somebody's going to do that, he's just like, hold on. You just said, these eight things, I'm going to respond to every single one. I've written them all down and then you can go, if you want to go point by point, we can, but you just said all this and I wrote it down, so we're going to go. So what are you actually writing down like a couple of words per point they left? Honestly, like there are very few unique conversations in politics. Like a lot of them are kind of retreading old ground. So if we're having a debate on abortion, somebody might say, like, oh, well, I believe this thing about viability and I believe this thing about, you know, when they're a fetus versus a human and I'll just write down like those points so that when I go to respond, I kind of have like a, like note cards, like a guiding thing there to keep me centered on my response. Political discourse is a kind of tree you're walking down and I got it. And you're like taking... Just to keep my focus guided. So I'm not like running off on a weird tangent or responding or something, I didn't say or something.

Research Note Taking (17:33)

What about like doing research? It just, is there a system to your note taking? Because mentally you seem to be one of the most organized people I've listened to. So is there... Is it in your mind or is there a system that's on paper? A little of both. I feel like the human mind is a beautiful thing if you have interest in an area. So like what I'll tell people is, let's say there's like a totally new topic that I'm researching. I don't know anything and I'll do a couple of these on stream. I think they're boring, but people watch it. I might open a Wikipedia article and I'll read and I hit something I don't know and then I open the next Wikipedia article and I'll read into it. And then I might have like seven tabs open and I'll read and I'll read and I'll read. And I'll read a ton of stuff maybe for hour two, three, four hours of stuff. And then by the end, you know, someone in chat will ask me like, "Do you even remember like this particular thing?" And I'll say, "Not really. No, not too much." But what happens is as long as you've seen it once, what'll happen is like the next day of the day after it will read something else and be like, "Oh, I remember that thing from this thing. I remember like vaguely that." And then if you see it like a third time, you're like, "Oh, this makes sense because especially when it comes to..." Oh, here's like a little trick on stuff. If you ever reading any news and there's a place that pops up, always look at it on a map because so much of history is like on a map. It's so important to like know the geography. It makes things make so much more sense. But yeah, once I start to see stuff over and over again, just because I've like read it a few times, stuff will start to kind of connect to my mind and like, "Oh yeah, well, this makes sense. Of course, these people believe this because of this." Or of course, like this happened here. It's because you know, that happened there. So yeah, it's a lot of that. If there's like a topic that I'm doing specific research for, so like vaccine related stuff is a big one, the Ukrainian Russian conflict is a big one, that I'll break out a note. I'll probably get like a Google Doc and I'll just start like writing like an outline of kind of the rough points of everything just to organize my thoughts around different topics. Yeah. We're just going to go on tangent upon a tangent upon a tangent. We'll return to the low point of your life at some point.

Ukrainian Russian Conflict (19:24)

Always returning from the philosophy to the psychology. So you did the Ukraine topic. One question is, what role does the US play in this war? Could they have done something to avoid the war? Did they have a role to play in forcing Vladimir Putin's hand? Do they have a role to play in de-escalating the war towards a peace agreement and the opposite? If it does escalate towards something like the use of a tactical nuclear weapon, are they to blame or are we to blame? Oh man, somebody sent me an email a while ago with great words. There's a specific way to navigate a conversation where you can kind of like contribute to a negative event, but you're not really the one responsible for it. Like the classic example is a woman goes out late at night, gets a little bit too drunk and then something happens and it's like, while there might have been steps she could have taken to mitigate the risk, it's not her fault of what happened because the responsibility rests on the agent making the choice. There's a chooser at some point that is choosing to do wrong or evil. I don't believe in any of the arguments that say the United States has contributed to Russia's position on Ukraine or the actions that they've taken on Ukraine. There are several arguments that some people, some even political scholars are putting out there to say that the United States is to blame, but I find them completely unconvincing. I think that when you ask the question of what is the United States role or what is our role been, I think it's really important for us. I don't think we even agree as a country on what our role should be, which I think is a hard one because you've got this kind of this is growing populist movement in the United States. It might be the far left and the far right. And I think populist tend to have this kind of isolationist view of the world, where the United States should just be our own thing. We shouldn't be telling anybody what to do. We shouldn't be the world police and then kind of more in these like center left center right positions and then across a lot of Europe, you've got, well, okay, the United States is kind of like the big kid on the block. We're looking to them for guidance and leadership on situations like what's going on in Ukraine. So in so far, the original question is like, what is the United States responsibility? I think we have a responsibility to ensure the relative freedom, prosperity, and stability across Europe. I think that defending Ukraine's sovereignty and right to their borders is a part of that. And I don't believe that prior to the invasion in 2022, I don't think the United States was contributing to Russia invading that country. I know there are arguments given that like the expansion of NATO, you know, has something that's been threatening to Russia, but the Baltics joined and Russia didn't do anything about it. The invasion to Crimea was very clearly a response to the revolution in 2014. The invasion on the borders is clearly a response to Ukraine winning that civil war in the southeast and the Donbass and Russia becoming more aggressive. I don't think that you can blame any of that on NATO expansion. There's no NATO countries that are threatening Russia or debating Russia. Do you think there is a nuclear threat? Do you think about this?

Is There A Nuclear Threat (22:22)

Do you worry about this that there is a threat of a tactical nuclear weapon being dropped? I think that possibility exists either way. And I think the responsibility for that is on Russia because it can't it just can't be the case that if you have nukes, you're allowed to invade countries and take their land because of anything. I think that that down the road also increases the potential for nuclear problems in the future, right? Because at that point, either every single country has to acquire their own nuclear weapons because if you don't, Russia is going to mess with you. Or every single country has to join NATO and now what we're back at square zero ground zero square one where people are like, "Oh, well, look, all these countries joining NATO is aggressive towards Russia. What are you going to do?" Yeah, you've mentioned that there's a complicated calculus going on with the countries that have nuclear weapons. And what's our responsibility? Are you allowed to do anything you want to countries that don't have nuclear weapons? That's a really tricky discussion for sure because what is you are supposed to do if Russia drops a tactical nuclear weapon? There's a set of options, none of which are good. And it's such a tricky moment right now because the things that Biden and other public figures say, I feel like has a significant impact on the way this game turns out because I think mutually sure destruction is partially a game of words. I mean, I believe in the Paul Rowan conversation of leaders talking to each other. I feel like you have to have a balance between threat and compromise and empathy for the needs, the geopolitical, the economic needs of a nation, but also respect and represent your own interests. It's a tricky one. How do you play the hand? It reminds me of evolutionary psych or evolutionary biology. There are things called tit for tat strategies. It reminds me of that where there are a whole bunch of these little biological mechanisms where creatures will develop socializing tit for tat. If you do something bad to me, I'm going to do something bad for you. And then more complicated schemes will come out where it'll be like tit tit for tat, where it's like you can make one mistake, and then I'm going to get you if you do a second one or it could be tit tit for tat or there could be tit for tat tat. There's like all these like back and forths where creatures kind of optimize themselves. Yeah, I think something the United States did really well in terms of that kind of conversational strategy. And I approved of this in the beginning was Biden was very clear about setting out like the exact level of US involvement for the war. We're not going to do a no fly zone. There's not going to be US troops on the ground in Ukraine, but we are going to send a whole bunch of money and a whole bunch of arms and a whole bunch of intel to them. And I thought he did a good job at laying out like the limitation of the US involvement while opening as much as we could in the ways we could help. But the yeah, that looming threat of some sort of tactical nuclear weapon, I think on the table right now is like it's going to be the annihilation of like Russian sea forces and everything. But you know, what happens if it continues to escalate? That's like a world that nobody wants to nobody wants to be in. Yeah. So we talked about difficult conversations and again, thank you so much for reviewing the Yay conversation.

How to have a difficult conversation (25:28)

Let me ask you about Putin. Speaking of difficult conversations, so if you sit down, if I sit down with somebody like Vladimir Putin or Vladimir Zelensky, what's the right way to have that conversation? Oh, man, we can talk about that one or we could talk about somebody more well understood through history, like something like Stalin or Hitler, something like that. Maybe that's an easier example to illustrate how to handle extremely difficult conversations. Yeah, I mean, I can handle really difficult conversations between like two people, leaders of countries though, there are so much that you are representing in that conversation. I guess the thing that would be interesting to me would be like, what is Vladimir Putin's interest? Like, what is the genuine interest that he has in the conflict? Because I think finding out like, what is your buy-in or what is your like, what is the driving force keeping me here? It's probably the most important thing. I think for Zelensky, I think it's quite a bit more simpler because he's he's on the defense. So it's defending his country and his people. For Putin, I've heard all sorts of things, you know, Dugan has his writings on, you know, like the East versus the West, the collapse of the West in the face of like all of the liberalism and the weird LGBT stuff that they criticize. You've got the desire to like return to this like former Soviet Union-esque thing. You've got Putin's quotes that collapse the Soviet Union was the biggest geopolitical disaster, you know, 20th century. And like, it's figuring out like, what is Putin after? I'm not actually sure. I don't know the answer to that question. A lot of people write about it. But yeah, well, there's a lot of answers to that question. There's a lot of answers that he can give to that question. So say I said down with them for three hours and talk about it. I think this is really interesting distinction because you do do difficult conversations in the space of ideas. But also in your stream, you have, I mean, there's a bunch of drama going on. There's a human psychology is laid out in its full richness before you. So to me, with leaders, I think a part of the conversation has to be about the human psychology. Not like a meta conversation, but like really understand what they feel, what they fear, who they are as a human being. Like as a family man, as a person proud of their country, as a person within egos, a person who's been affected, if not corrupted by powers, all of us can be and likely are. So all of that, that gives context to then the answers about what do you want in this war? Is that the answers about what you want in this war will be political answers. It's like a game that's being played again with words and politicians are incredibly good at playing that game. I think the deeper truth comes from understanding the human being from which those words come. And I think that's what you do. I don't know if you do those kinds of conversations where- Never talk to any country leaders. No, not a country leader, but say a controversial figure or somebody that represents a certain idea, don't just talk in the space of ideas or challenge the ideas, but understand who is this person, how did you come to those ideas? Oh yeah, when I've had, there have been a couple of very controversial, right-leaning figures. So the two, obviously the Maestreamers, maybe they're Lawrence Southern and Nick Funtes. And those types of conversations initially aren't very political at all. Yeah, it's more like- Obviously we believe in very, very, very different things, but beliefs don't happen accidentally. So how did you get to where you are? Those are way more personal conversations, that's true. Is there things you regret about those conversations where you failed? Is there things you're proud of where you succeeded? For things that I'm proud of, I feel like I'm really good at attempting to understand people without judgment.

Venturing into the MAGA-verse (29:11)

That I think a lot of people feel like they can have conversations with me where they can share a lot, and I'm not going to jump down their throat for them having a politically incorrect observation, or for them being judgmental, somebody else or having a feeling that's maybe not something they should have something they're embarrassed about. So I think I do a really good job at that. And then by extension of that, I've gotten the ability to hear perspectives from so many different people that I think I can understand a lot of different perspectives. For failures of mine, I mean, it's always going to be on stream, it'll be like I didn't push back hard enough, or I didn't know a certain fact for a conversation. These are usually the- They're going to be on these very technical grounds generally. I'm pretty happy with the direction my conversations have gone recently, especially over the past six months. So your goal is to de-radicalize the audience of those folks.

Giving Empathy versus Pushing Back (30:00)

So that used to be my goal. My goal was de-radicalization. Now I'm kind of hoping that that's just the byproduct. So the goal I think is to talk to somebody and to show they believe this because of these reasons. And if you want to change people's beliefs, we have to talk about the underlying reasons for why they think the things they think. It's not enough to just say like that belief is bad, because it's like, well, they believe it for a whole bunch of things that are true and real to them at least. So you have to address all of the underlying things that they believe before you can change the overlying belief. So if I'm having a conversation with somebody, it'll be like, okay, why do you feel this about that, that, and that? Okay, I understand that. Maybe like a better way to solve that would be like this or that instead of this thing. So to what degree do you have to empathize with the person's worldview versus pushback? That's always the hard one. When I'm talking to other people, it's almost always me stepping as much inside their bubble as I can. I have to like live and breathe their worldview and be able to speak their worldview in order to like navigate their thoughts. Because my worldview is, I don't even, I'm not even using this as an insult. I don't know if I am a little bit autistic or something, but when I break apart things, I just want to see like study, study, study, fact, fact. That's how my mind works for everything. That's just how that's what I like to see. Like personal stories don't do much for me, narratives don't do much for me, just show me like the data and the studies or whatever. But for other people, I think most brains are more human than that and they tend to see things in more kind of like surreal pictures that are kind of painted and the brush strokes are way broader and they don't care about the itty bitty tiny fact. So if I'm talking to somebody also, I'm trying to get into their head and I'm trying to change their mind on things, I'm going to be stepping into their world and I'm going to try to be working through that framework. Really good example might be, we'll say like when it comes to trans issues for minors, okay, 16 or 17 year old needs to go on puberty blockers. The way that I want that debate to play out is let's look at all the data, let's see what are the outcomes, let's see what are the processes for getting a medication and then we'll evaluate all of that and then we'll go in whatever points more favorably, but that's wholly unconvincing to most people, right? So as a parent, if I'm having that conversation with another parent, the easiest way for me to have that conversation is like, hey, we both have kids. Imagine how horrible it would be if we felt like our kids needed help and the government was trying to get between us and their doctor and that conversation. That might be how that talk plays out, which I mean, that's a really good argument because I think there probably are times when the government should get between it, but I'll have that conversation because now I'm in a world where they understand what I'm saying, I'm resonating with the way that they feel about things and then I can make progress with the way that they're kind of viewing the world because I'm talking in a language they understand. So on this particular topic of trans issues, is that the reason you were banned from Twitch?

Tech And Gaming Discussions

Twitch Ban (32:33)

I'm not sure, I don't know. They just said hate speech, but I don't use slurs or anything, so it's hard to know exactly. So I think you made the claim that trans women shouldn't compete with cis women in women's athletics. Can you make this case and can you steal men the case against it? I think in your community, there's a lot of trans folks who love you and there's a lot who hate you. Yeah. And so if you can walk the tightrope of this conversation to try to steal men both sides. One of the argumentative strategies I say is that like any time you have a conversation, you should be able to argue both sides better than anybody else. So for the my side, the genuine belief side, it feels like overwhelmingly, all of the data is showing that trans, mostly trans women, even after I think three years on some sort of like HRT or estrogen stuff, they're still maintaining these advantages from their male puberty over cisgender women. And if that is the case, if we are going to draw these distinctions around our sports between women and men, it feels unfair to have a category inside the women's sports that are maintaining advantages that are coming from a male puberty, regardless of the amount of time they've spent on hormone replacement therapy. So that would be my argument on that side. So it's unfair from a performance enhancement aspect. So the same way we ban performance, performance enhancing drugs that involve increasing of testosterone in that same way would be unfair. Essentially, yeah. So what's the case against the key? Yeah, so the case in favor of them competing together is that realistically, there's not going to be a trans sports category. Realistically, trans women aren't going to be competitive with cis men because they've gone through these huge, you know, like hormone changes by the medication they're taking. And that when we look at how sports are kind of done anyway, there's a whole bunch of biological differences between people within sports categories that are determining their placement in the professional world. So for instance, somebody like me is probably never going to go far in the NBA because I'm not tall enough. I think the average height in the NBA, don't doubt yourself. Don't doubt myself yet. I want to say like six or something. They're huge people. Or you look at like Michael Phelps is a classic example of a guy who's torso is like so long, his body is built for swimming. And I think there are some trans people that will look at that or some people advocating for this position to look at them and go, okay, realistically, the way that Michael Phelps body processes lactic acid, the shape physiologically of his body is going to put him in a level of competition that so many men are never going to reach just because of biology. How is it fair that you can have these biological outliers competing in these categories? But then when we come to like sports categories with transinsist women, you're going to take trans women and say that they can't compete against this women. Can't you also just say that they have some level of biological difference there? Like, is it really going to be that great of a difference than what Michael Phelps has versus the average swimmer or an NBA player has versus like the average height male? Yeah. Do you think we're going to get into some tricky ethical territory as we start to be able to, through biology and genetics, modify the human body?

Does Dr. Hassan think robots will replace art? (35:50)

Absolutely. I feel like those things are coming sooner than we wanted them to. The, oh, man, do they have you seen the AI art? Yes. That's a, of course, I'm an AI person. Oh, yeah. Then yeah. That's always been like, what's going to happen when robots can do art better than humans? LOL. Like, well, we'll see in 20 years and 20 years and 20 years. And now you have AI art winning competitions. And it's funny because robots are essentially the robot behind you, by the way. Robot behind me. Oh, nice. Robots are really good. Careful what you say. Yeah. Oh, God, I'll be careful. That's not like one of the Chinese ones with a gun on it, right? Oh, okay. Hopefully not. We'll see, depending on what you say. Robots are really good at showing the limitations of the human mind in categories that we didn't believe we were limited before. I think that humans have this idea intrinsically that we have like some type of like innovative, creative drive that is just outside of the bounds of physical understanding. And with a sophisticated enough program, we see that maybe that's not actually true. And that's a really scary thing philosophically to deal with because we feel like we're very special, right? We own the planet, we make computers, and the idea that you can start to get these robots that can do things that's like, okay, you can do math, fine. Okay, you can do calculations because it's fine, but you can't do art. That's the human stuff. And then when they start to do that, it's like, oh, shoot. And that terrifies you a little bit like losing the human species losing control of our dominance. I don't think it's necessarily losing control of our dominance. I mean, I guess like a Skynet thing could come in at some point. But I think I think it more it brings us to this really fundamental level of like, what does it mean to be human? What is it that we're good at? What should we be doing with technology? We never really asked that question in the western world. It's always the technology is like normative in that technology equals good and more technology equals better. That's been like the default assumption. In fact, if you ask a lot of people, how do you know if civilization has progressed over the past 100 or 200 years? They don't say, we have better relationships, we have longer marriages, we blah, blah, blah. They'll say technology is improved. We've got crazy phones, we've got crazy computers. And the idea that more technology might be bad has never even crossed somebody's mind unless it's used for like a really bad thing. So, well, it's interesting. We kind of think as more and more automation is happening, we're going to get more and more meaning from things like being artists and doing creative pursuits. And here's like, oh shit, if the art, if the creative pursuits are also being automated, then what are we going to gain meaning from? What are the activities from what you'll gain meaning? You know, my whole life, I've been working on artificial intelligence systems. There's been different revolutions. One of them is the machine learning revolution. And it's interesting to build up intuition and destroy that intuition about what is and isn't solvable by machines. I think for the longest time, I grew up thinking the game of growth is not solvable because my understanding of AI systems is ultimately that it's fundamentally a search mechanism that is fundamentally going to be brute force. There's no shortcuts. Sure. Like if it can't solve the traveling salesman problem, it's not even going to be able to give you an approximation. So, most interesting problems are a giant travel salesman problem. And then so, of course, it's not going to be able to solve that. And then you, then the deep learning revolution made you realize, holy shit, these large networks with a giant number of knobs is able to actually somehow estimate functions that can do a pretty good job of understanding deep representation of a thing, whether that's a game of Go, or whether it's the human natural language, or if it's images and video or audio and even actions in different video games and actions of robotics and so on. And then you realize with diffusion models and different generative models, you start to realize, holy shit, it can actually generate not just interesting representations or interesting manifestations of the representations of forms, but it's able to do something that impresses humans in its creativity. It's beautiful in the way we think of art is beautiful. Like it surprises us and makes us chuckle and makes us sit back and all and all those kinds of things. And yet, the thing that it seems to struggle with the most is the physical world currently.

Will SpaceX scientists simulate human evolution? (40:28)

So that's counterintuitive. We humans think that it's pretty trivial. Being able to pick up a cup, being able to write with a pen, like in the physical space, we think that's trivial. We give ourselves respect for being great artists and great mathematicians and all that kind of stuff. And that seems to be much easier than the physical space. Our bodies are really cool. There is a, I don't know, it's probably asthma or something. There was some science fiction writer that had a short story and it was like an alien that had landed on Earth and it was describing our bodies from a totally alien perspective. And when you think about all the things we can do, it's pretty cool. We can climb through a whole multitude of environments, we can exist in a multitude of temperatures, we can manipulate things just with our hands and the way that we can interact with things around us. And yeah, we're very capable on a physical level. Even though, like you said, we think about ourselves like, "Oh, well, human beings have really big brains." And we do. We're really intelligent as well. But our bodies are pretty cool too. And it's a fascinating hierarchical biological system that made up of a bunch of different living organisms that all don't know about the big picture of our body. And it's all functioning, it's all a little local world and it's doing its thing. But together as it forms a super resilient system, all of that comes from a very compressed encoding of what makes a human. You start with the DNA and it builds up from a single cell to a giant organism. And because of the DNA, through the evolution process, you can constantly create new humans and new living organisms that adopted the environment. Like that resilience to the physical world, it seems like running the whole earth over again, the whole evolutionary process over again, is might be the only way to do it. So to create a robot that actually adapts is as resilient to the dynamic world, might be a really difficult problem. Possibly. Well, it's going to say like in a programming environment, you can do things on time scales that are impossible in the real world, right? Like the benefit to AI and computers is a computation where they can compute so much data so quickly.

Michaels Personal DNA and Evolution Simulations on Earth (42:45)

Whereas on human timetables, we have to wait when you talk about evolution, it's generation after generation after generation, maybe in a virtual environment that could be simulated. And then those changes could happen a lot quicker. Well, that's in a human time scale, but you have to look at earth as a quantum mechanical system, the computation is happening super fast. This is a giant computer doing a giant simulation. So just because for us humans, it's slow, there's trillions of organisms involved in you, destiny being you. Sure. But the next iteration of from human to human, even if on the quantum level, it's a lot of stuff going on, you talk about changes in DNA, for instance, right? That's happening from a generation to generation time scale, like in a virtual environment, that could theoretically happen. Well, it already is, there's like protein folding, huge cloud computing, probably ML stuff that's working on doing all that stuff. And it'll run trillions and trillions of simulations every second and stuff, maybe not every second, but still slower than the actual protein folding, much slower. That's for the problem of solving protein folding to estimate the 3D structure, but the actual body does the actual protein folding way faster. So like where the question is, can we shortcut the simulation of human evolution, try to figure out how to build up an organism without simulating all the details? Because we have to simulate all the details of biology, we're screwed. We don't have... Oh, sure. We'd have to put something in a pond and then watch it for a billion years. That's what the universe most likely is. It's a kind of simulation created by a teenager in their basement to try to see what happens. It's a computer game. That might be the most efficient way to create interesting organisms. But within the system, it's perhaps possible to create other robots that will be of use and will entertain us in the way that other humans entertain us. And that's a really interesting, of course, problem, but it's surprising how difficult it has been to create systems that operate in the physical world and operate in that physical world in a way that's safe to humans and interesting to humans. Because there's also the human factor, the human robot interaction. To me, that's like the most interesting problem, to figure out how to do that well. And so Yomask and others, Boston Dynamics have worked on legged robots. So I really care about legged robots. Those are super interesting how to make them such that they're able to operate successfully in dynamic environment. It's super tricky. They're like the dumbest of dogs, speaking of which is a dog barking outside. It's really tricky to create those kinds of organisms that live in the human world. Then again, if more and more of us move into the digital world, so you stream a lot, like part of who you are, exist in the digital space.

Having a Parallel Identity Online (45:36)

The fact you have a physical representation also, maybe more and more will become not important. I hope that's the case because I bought a lot of stock in meta and man, it's down a lot. Meta the company. Is there some degree, like can you look at yourself, like Steven, the physical meat vehicle, and then the destiny of this digital space, like digital avatar? Do you sense that in a certain way you're the digital avatar? I've always tried to keep my on stream personality as genuine as possible. So they're one and the same to me. I don't really view them as two separate entities. But I mean, I always be myself with Steven, the real life person. My destiny is my online name. But because your social network is established in the digital space, like so many people know you through the digital space, can we swap out another person that looks like you in the AI system? And then that entity known as destiny will continue existing. I mean, there must be some level of sophistication that could emulate a human brain, I would imagine, right? Probably the text not there yet, but... Well, the question is, what's the level of sophistication of the audience that would recognize that something has changed? Like it's the touring test. How hard is it to trick your audience? You're your large audience of fans that watch your streams, that when you swap out in the AI that emulates you, that nothing has changed. And the question is, do you have to really simulate so much of the human brain for that? I don't think so. Probably not. And so, I mean, like you said, a lot of political discourses are just walking down the tree together. So you can probably emulate a lot of that discussion. Yeah, it would depend on if you're doing old datasets and you're training on that and I'm having conversations about abortion and your crannied vaccines. I imagine it could do it for quite a while. The only thing that would be weird is when novel issues pop up, then you probably need a more sophisticated resemblance of the inner brain. You have to keep training on the internet, so how the language models, and that's the most incredible breakthroughs, is the language models. You just have to keep retraining the system on Reddit, which is actually what a lot of it is trained on, which is hilarious. I do think it's really interesting that like kind of like funny problems, like the trolley problem that we can kind of work through our normative ethical systems on are now like real questions. Or like if you're driving a Tesla and it's an autopilot and you're going to hit somebody, but it can swerve and hit somebody else like what what ought the system do? Like we went very quickly from fun kind of like project in philosophy class to we need to solve this for insurance purposes like as quickly as possible. It's kind of interesting to think about. Well, I actually have a bring up the trolley problem with you later. There's a fascinating version of it that I find hilarious. Okay, let's return to your low point.

Playing video games, balancing personal life & still working (48:30)

Oh yeah. You started playing video games. That was a lucky break. You did text-based ones. That was a lucky break because you got to be pretty good at learning. And then you started thinking about going to college and so on. What happened next? I mean, I went to like a prep school. So you kind of have to go to college after. That's like the point, right? I was also millennial. All of us had to go to college. That's always what they told us. So my life was kind of it's hard to describe. I didn't really think much of the future. I was just kind of enjoying the day to day because everything in my life was pretty weird. Both my parents had moved to Florida by the time I was 16, 17. I was like, grandma was working. I had a girlfriend moved out. We got a place. Did college. By the time I got into college, I had transitioned from working at McDonald's to I was like working at a casino restaurant basically. And I was really good at that job. So high level of patience for drunk people and insane people. And I was doing music in school because I've really grown to love music. And my kind of thought process was, my thought process was I can do music as a hobby, I guess, unless I get really good and maybe I can make money with that. But otherwise, I love music and I'm okay going to school for music, getting good at it and then just doing that on the side. And then my main job would kind of be this career I was building at the casino. And basically the trying to balance personal life plus graveyard shift, six-dara weeks at a casino and then a full-time music degree was not possible for me. And eventually I had to drop school after I think it was like three years. And after I dropped school to maintain my casino job, after a few months, I got fired from my casino job. So I'd essentially just throw on away like the past like three or four years of my life. Why did you get fired from the casino job? I heard there's a story behind that. Yeah, there's a story. Basically, I was just really dumb when it came to understanding corporate politics. And this is funny because the same attitude kind of followed me into the streaming world. My thought process has kind of always been that like, as long as I'm really good at what I do, I should be untouchable. If I'm really good, you can't do anything to me. I don't have to play any dumb games or whatever. And at the casino, I think I was the youngest. It was originally, shift, leave, unsupervised position at the casino. And when I started to get my own shifts, there were problems that I would run into on graveyard shift because of carryover from the swing shift. And one of these problems was underneath the soda machine, they weren't cleaning it properly and fruit flies were showing up. And I, the manager came in one morning and she was like, Hey, what's going on with the machine? And I told her, like, listen, I can't do, I can't take everything from swing shift and do everything in grave shift. I can't do this. They need to figure out their stuff better or I need more in place. It's not possible for me. And she's like, what did you tell anybody else? Like, yeah, I complained to the supervisor on the swing shift all the time. And she told me, if you're not getting the answer that you like, then it's your responsibility to email the next person up. And I was like, Oh, okay, that's interesting. And some months went on. And I ran into more problems because on graveyard, here's how I don't know if it's everywhere. But morning shift is the easiest. And that's when you're the most overstaffed because that's when all the VPs are in. And that's when all the managers are there and everybody blah, blah, blah. Swing shift is the most challenging. That's where your highest flow of customers is. You're also decently staffed there. But there's a lot of stuff going on in graveyard. Nobody cares at all about you. They don't give you any employees. You might get swamped. You might not who cares. Make sure it's clean for day shift. That's the only thing that matters. Quick question first of the clarification. So this is 24 hour. 24 hour down.

Streaming Career Reflections

Graveyard Shift Training (51:44)

Yeah, it's a casino. So the dining and casino. Oh, by the way, I had an amazing moment dining at casino recently. It's a special place. A dining and casino is a place of magic. There's a lot of magic. There's a lot of otherworldly stuff going on. There's characters. There's and I had an interaction with the waitress that was the sweetest waitress in the world. And I was just like, I don't know, made me feel less alone in this cruel world of ours. So graveyard begins when? For me, my shift was 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. Or sometimes I got called in early, so it'd be 8 p.m. to 6 a.m. That's no love for that shift. No, especially not trying to do school at the same time. Absolutely not. But yeah, basically, long story short, I ran into a problem with myself where I didn't have enough employees on my shift. VPs were coming in the morning. They were like, hey, the diner's kind of dirty. And I'm like, you've cut all my employees past 4 a.m. Like on some nights, I'm literally cooking and doing front of house, like all of my own. Like, I can't do this. And my manager, Pam, told me, well, you've got to figure it out. And so I remembered her advice. So I emailed the VP food and beverage, and I see see to her. And I said, I'm not getting the help I need on my restaurant. Now, I didn't know at the time that I was basically completely throwing her under the bus because of that email. But retroactively, when I look back on things, or retrospectively, I see that was the moment that I got like marked for deletion. And I didn't really understand it, even though I had heard terminology about paper, I think somebody out the door. But after that point, I started to get written up for like a lot of little random things. Like, I'd missed one day of work in my three years at the casino. And I started getting written up for like, showing up like one or two minutes late. That's kind of weird. I don't know, whatever. Or written up for random ways about filing paperwork. And then eventually, there came a situation with another employee where they were, it's complicated, it has to like call it stuff. But basically, they wanted to come or they wanted to call out. And I told them if they called out, they were going to get fired because they were at like 10 points. They were at nine points and 10 points is firing blah, blah, blah. Pam told me, you can tell that she's going to get a point, but you can't tell if she's going to get fired. I don't know what that meant. And then I told her that if you call out, you're going to get, you know, you're fucked, you're going to get fired. Or you're going to be at 10 points. And then I got called in early, like three days later. And Pam was like, you inappropriately communicated with an employee, because you said the F word in a text message. And I'm like, really? There's no shot. And she's like, well, you also tried to fire the employee. And it's like, no, I told her she was going to get 10 points. She's like, well, you use the F word. I'm like, this is insane. And I didn't, just because I was such a, such a high performing applause, like there's no way I'm getting fired. And then I did. And I was like, yeah, cash out my 401k and moped for like three months, because I had thrown away school for this casino job. And then I got fired from this job that like, yeah, nobody believed I got fired. It was just insane. So if you look back, if you were allowed to not just look back to your own memory, but actually watch yourself, like somebody who recorded video that whole time, do you think you would be surprised? You would notice some things like potentially of not having a self awareness, not having like social, like a civility and social etiquette that's played in the human relations. Yeah, absolutely. So is that is that at the core of it, essentially? Yeah, I think so. I mean, it follows me even to this day, there's a lot of, I don't know if you're recording or not, but when we spoke early about like meta conversations, I have to think a lot sometimes about meta conversations, because the way that I want to drive a conversation will sometimes be way different than what is like the best way to have a conversation, whereas I just want to like go really hard on like some itty bitty, like some idiosyncrasy, some factor figure, whatever. But that's not like the human conversation I need to have, you know? So you got fired, left that job, and that took you to the job that would be the lowest point.

Why was the carpet cleaning job a low point? (55:11)

Yeah. Because there was a huge downgrade in pay. I went from getting like, I think of the casino, because I worked so much over time, I was getting like 22, 15 hour on all my over time, 15. This was back in 2008, 2009 as like a college student, like it's amazing pay. The I had benefits, like everything was good. And then the carpet cleaning was like, I was probably getting my paycheck, like every other week was maybe 1500 bucks or 1000 dollars, and I'm working like 13 day stretches, like I have every other Sunday off, and it's so many hours, like I have to show up at the shop at like seven or six, and then I go home at like eight or nine, depending on when my jobs are throughout the day. You doing businesses or residential or what are you doing? Everything. Everything. Are you working for a company that's covered? Yeah. Or you do? Okay. So like there's a schedule thing, you have to go to it and so on. Yeah, but so like this is why the schedule would suck is sometimes I'd show up at, I think we had to be in the shop at, I think it was seven a.m. We show up at the shop at seven a.m. First job might be at eight or nine, but that job might be like a one hour job. So I might show up at seven a.m. and have a job from eight 30 to nine 30. Then my next job might not be from until like say 11. So from eight 30 to nine 30, I'll do one job. And then I've got a job from like 11 to 12 or something. Then I might have like a decent job from like five to eight, but like my whole day is destroyed. And I'm doing like three smallish jobs. So I'm getting like 30 bucks maybe for being in the shop or you know, my job for like 10 or 11 hours and it's just like horrible. So here's somebody that seems to be extremely good at thinking and conversation. And so I have a bit of an ego perhaps in both the negative and the positive sense of that word. Was there some aspect of working on McDonald's and then working at the casino and working for the as a carpet cleaner that was humbling? No, never. I had a. The ego burned bright through it all. The well. Or no, you can push back on the ego. Yeah, no, I understand. I totally get what you mean. I had a really close friend growing up whose name was Chris. And I think we probably met when he was like four or five, I think he lived behind me. And I grew up with him and I'd always been kind of an outsider to the world that I was in once I got to high school for sure because all of those kids were incredibly wealthy, you know, Corvettes and Mustangs when they turned 16. It was a prep school. And I was doing the they had like a work study program there where you could stay after school from two, three to five every day to kind of like work to pay for your tuition. So I've been working like throughout all of high school. I got another job at McDonald's when I was 18, worked at the casino. Like I'd always been doing that kind of work. I never really viewed it as like beneath me or anything. That's not like I don't have like a family of doctors or lawyers or anything. And then me and my other friend, Chris, we'd always make fun of everybody else for being kind of like, you know, like preppy kids and everything. So there is a there's some pride to that sort of hard work. Yeah, I guess a little bit. Yeah. Because yeah, looking especially my dad, like the solution to every problem was just throw more hours of work at it basically. So that was always my yeah, go to and I never am. What was psychologically the low point? I think psychologically the low point was that as I'm doing this carpet cleaning job, driving around my city, there's like this feeling of I guess for a lot of people, it's probably college, but there's a feeling when you're in high school that everything is like so exciting and the whole world is kind of in front of you. And there are a trillion, trillion different branching paths of possibilities. And you know, even through high school, you're thinking like, am I going to be a doctor or a lawyer or can I join the MBA or can I do this or that? There's all these things in front of you. And when I especially felt when I was doing these carpet cleaning jobs and I think it was in the fall, I'd be outside some of these houses and I just kind of look around. And I'd recognize a lot of these neighborhoods that I drive around with friends in or I'd you know, be walking through. I ran cross country. Some of them I'd be running through these neighborhoods. And it was just kind of like this feeling of looking around and it was like, when I was here in the past, this is like kind of like a transitionary phase of my life, where I'm doing this and it's so fun and exciting and then I'm going to move on to something else and it's going to be fun and exciting and awesome. And then like, you know, two years later, my whole life is collapsed. Like I'm in a house that I can't afford anymore. My ex that I hate is pregnant with my kid and I have no money. I've got no upward mobility. I failed college. My job is horrible. Like just every single like this is like my all of those, the way function had collapsed into one thing and that one thing was the worst thing that could have possibly been at the time for me. Yeah, like everything was gone in horrible. So yeah, that was the feeling that out of the time. Do you ever come to play suicide? I thought about thinking about it, but I've just never been that kind of person. So I mean, basically as a way to escape from the hardship, something that I'm so incredibly lucky. I don't know why or how I'm just going to chalk it up to biology. I've always had really high mental baseline. I've like depression and all of that. There have been a few short stints of doubt with it past 30 because I did a lot of drugs. But other than that, my mental baseline is just so high. And even in the carpet cleaning days, like if you, man, the videos might still be there. I think on my old YouTube channel, where I'll be like playing Starcraft when I first started getting an streaming and I'll be calling up customers like this is Steve from Guaranteed Clean. We had to move your job back one hour. Is it okay if I show up instead of 230 and then I hang up and I was like, all right, guys, we got three more games and I was like, let's go like stuff like that. So my, my baseline has always been like really high for mental function. So even in a lot of pointers that you had strength, is there, is there anything you can give by way of advice from people that for whom the wave function collapses as it does for many of us, like, holy fuck, the world is not full of opportunity and you're kind of a failure. Like I've, I've been there. Yeah, I don't know. It's rough because like I usually ask for compassion from people that have it better off because like once you're down there, like the only reason I say I got lucky, but it wasn't even really lucky. Like, or it was lucky, but it was more lucky. It wasn't just lucky that I got into streaming. It was lucky that I was into computers at an early age. It was lucky that I played video games at an early age. It was lucky that all the tech came up at exactly that right point in time. Like I was a pretty smart guy, but it was definitely a preparation meets opportunity. And that opportunity was like at the exact precise moment of my life. If anything had gone differently, then I would just be cleaning carpets today. So in the many worlds, interpretation of quantum mechanics, this is like one out of like, there's many, many Stevens, they're just still carpet cleaning and they're full of pain and resentment. Yeah. The one piece of advice that I give, I hate that I have to push back against all these crypto bros and everybody online for decently intelligent people that are successful. I've never heard anybody give a contradiction to this. Maybe you will. You can tell me if you disagree. I always look at kids in high school and I'm like, just try a little bit harder like 30 minutes a night.

What Stephen would say to an ambitious high school kid who wants to get into streaming today (01:01:50)

If you don't study, just do 30 minutes, just do a little bit more. It is you're laying the foundation for the rest of your life and you can't appreciate it in high school and college. But oh my god, when you get out, everything in your life is so much easier.

Investing in school (01:02:00)

You have probably more responsibility over the direction of your life when you're like 13, 14 years old than you ever will once you're like 25 and older. Because this is like when you're determining the foundations that everything's going to build. Yeah, 100%. First of all, it does seem that the liberating aspect of being young is like anything you learn. So working hard at learning something will pay off in like nonlinear ways, like you said with video games. I feel like people who are like, I hate school. All right, well, fine. But find something where you're challenging yourself, you're growing, you're learning, you're learning a skill, you're learning about a thing. Of course, you know, you could push back and say, well, there's some trajectories that might not be productive. Like if you spend the entirety of your teen years playing, I don't know, legal legends, a game of love and hate relationship with. No, just a hate and hate relationship. Okay, well, we'll talk about, I think you have a love, hate relationship with hate in general. We'll just and love, we'll try to de-complexify that one. I think in general, just investing yourself fully with passion, it really does pay off. But that said, also school, I feel like doesn't get enough credit, like high school in particular, middle school in high school, because it's general education. I think if you're, especially if you're lucky to have good teachers, but honestly, I haven't mostly the textbooks themselves with good teachers. It's a one chance in life you have to really explore a subject. Fuck grades, like getting good grades is at tension, I would say, with actual learning. That is true. But just get a biology textbook and to explore ideas and biology and allowing yourself to be inspired by the beauty of it. Yeah, I don't know. I think that really, really, really pays off and you never get a chance to do that again. And maybe not even textbooks, like reading, straight up reading. I think if you read, this is a one time in life, you get a chance to read, really read, like read a book a day read. You can really invest, you can really grow by reading. I mean, I'm going to ask all those guys, talk about it. It's very, very rare that you meet a dumb person who reads a lot. I don't know if that's ever happened in my life. Dumb or not successful. And the cool thing is, it seems like the reading, this is like investment. The reading you do early on in high school pays off way more than the reading you do later. So like the really influential reading is doing those high school years because you're basically learning from others the mistakes they've made, the solutions to problems. You're basically learning the shortcuts to life. Like whatever the hell you want to do, music, read from the best people that the music theory, like learn music theory, learn the read biographies about jazz musicians, blues musicians, see all the mistakes, see what they did, see the shortcuts. If you want to do podcasting, read about other podcasts, if you want to do streaming, read about the streamers, physicists and so on. And I feel like you figure out all the mistakes and get through a shortcut through life, because most people show up to college without having done that. And now you get a chance to shortcut your way past them. Yeah, 100%. But nobody really teaches you that. They're like, go to school from this time to that time. You're shut up. This is just what you do each abruptly. I think there's two huge problems. One is now that I'm older, because you don't know anything as a kid. You can't really criticize as adults as a kid, because you're a kid. You're ages, if I'm super ages. As I get older, I get even more ages. There are a lot of people who are arguments like, man, dude, you're really 22, aren't you? I can tell every word you say, just seems of like 22 year old, but that's okay. I love that for you. No, I could just say, because you mentioned this, your wife is a fellow streamer, Molina. You mentioned that this is a source of fights for the two of you that, and I could just feel that there is truth to what you're saying, which is like, all right, you're saying that because you're 22, just wait until you're 25, and you won't be saying that anymore.

Streamers in their 20's vs 30's (01:06:17)

Sure. No, that is the most annoying thing for people to hear. Yeah, you can't ever say that of commercial. Because it's actually usually true, because we do go through phases in life, and you can understand that most things are phases. So just in general, you can say, just wait, just wait. You won't feel this way again. I could say that to you. You could say that to yourself, just wait, whatever you're feeling like, just wait. If I have 10 years, it'd be a different person, and you will laugh at the things you take seriously now, that they're causing you pain now, all that kind of stuff. But people hate hearing that. Absolutely. I think the joke that I always say is that if I could literally step into a time machine, and I could come back out and see myself as a 17 year old, and I could say, hey, I am literally you from the future. You see the time machine, and I would look at me, and I would see the time machine, and I would give myself the best advice in the world. I mean, the most successful person, I would ignore all of it. Even knowing it came for myself, I'd be like, this guy sold out. This dude doesn't know what the fuck he's talking about. Like, now I'll figure it out better. Like, he must have made some of this. That's what I would think is a 17 year old. I knew it was myself in the future. I would just 100% never believe it. And knowing that is very frustrating. But I keep that in mind when I deal with younger people. That's why I never, I always stay on stream when I'm talking to, like, there's been stuff with like, sneakers, another girl on a stream called Lab. Like, when I see the way the, I see the mistakes they're making, oftentimes, because I've made all of these mistakes, sometimes in the most public and horrible fashion ever. But I'm never like a mentor. I'm not gonna sit there and like, tell you like, oh, do this or that or that, because like, I don't know if you're gonna listen to me. And I don't want to kind of send to you. And you know, you figure stuff out, I'll be here if you want to talk about it. But yeah, there was a one of those stories. There was a company that didn't work with me because I was very adamant on defending like very radical notions about language and racial slurs and everything. And I was like 22 or whatever. And there was a company and they said, well, we don't want to work with this guy for an event. And after they'd said that, I'd written an article on my website called the company was Gigabyte. They make motherboards. I said, fuck Gigabyte in the ass. That was the title to my article. And it was like, well, they don't want to work with me. I'm gonna blow them up and never do anything ever with them again. And it was just like, like looking back at it now, obviously, as an older person, like, hey, you need to pump the brakes and chill. You're destroying yourself. But yeah, as a young person, it's like, yeah, you're 22. Of course, you think that you can say whatever and do whatever. And as long as you're good at what you're doing, you've got the whole world behind you. And yeah, Chase, well, let's go there.

On his offensive language history (01:08:39)

You have a history of using offensive language, like the R word, the N word, including the N word with a hard R, calling women bitches, talking about rape in a nonchalant way. What part of that do you regret? And what part of that do you not? Language is very complicated. When it comes to stuff relating to slurs, there's been like a whole trajectory of feelings on everything related to language. So my for you personally and for the Internet as a whole. Yeah, I don't care about the Internet, almost for me personally. In my early 20s, I'll say like 22, 23, I think probably when I first started streaming, my feeling is that any word is just a word. And if it hurts you, that's your fault, take responsibility for yourself. This probably came from my background of being like a really independent person. So that's just kind of like the mind that I had for everything. And there were basically there were like a collection of experiences that I had that as I grew, I started to realize like, okay, well, I feel differently about some of these words, depending on the context. And I can see how they can affect other people depending on the context. So as a kind of like grown, I think I've developed a more sophisticated understanding of how different words are used and how they affect people, whether they like it or not. And more importantly, whether I like it or not. And that words can, even if I don't want it to be, they can be a vehicle for emboldening certain types of ideas that I don't want to embolden. And yeah, that's kind of been the whole like growth. I've been lucky that in the time that I came up on the internet, I was able to learn these lessons because if I was trying to learn those same lessons today, I would have been completely destroyed because I had insane views on language like 10 years ago. We could talk about the past, we could talk about the present, let's talk about the past first. So how do you deal with the fact that there's videos of you in the past saying the N word, including the N word with a hard R? So generally, what's the contest? Can you give me like, yeah, what would be the context usually? When I lay out this defense, it's not because I wouldn't have used the N word. Generally, whenever I said the N word, it was usually in an example of like, this is something that like a racist person would say, I don't think I've ever, on the internet, I think I've ever called anybody like the N word with a hard R. Not because I wouldn't have, but just because it wasn't in my vocabulary, I played RTS real time strategy and we use the F slur for gay people. That's what I use that one a ton. I call people that a ton in the past. So I should actually just as a small tangent. And this is what I like to explore with you. There's a ruthlessness to the language in the gaming world. And there's different communities, they have different flavors of language of hate speech essentially. And there's also a humor to it, which really bothers me in a dark way that I haven't been able to really think through because humor seems to be a kind of catalyst for hate. It seems to normalize hate. Like you say, basically, it's like Lucy K says a lot of edgy things, but you take something Lucy K says and do it in a non funny way and do it over and over and over and keep increasing the hatefulness of it. The vitriol and somehow you find yourself like Alice in Wonderland in a world full of hate, where there is no good and evil. It's all the same. In fact, the good is to be mocked and the evil is to be celebrated for the humor of it, basically not taking the ideas of evil seriously. And I don't know what it reveals something about human nature that you can let go. The moral of relativism that can happen when you do that kind of stuff. At the same time, I'm a fan of dark humor when done well. Anyway, for people who are not familiar, I just wanted to mention that some of the worst hate speech that ends in LOL happens in gaming communities. And that's where you come from in certain parts. So a lot of people don't remember this or don't know this because they're younger, but way back in the day, in the late 90s, early mid 2000s of the internet, the way that online kind of like shit talk work was you were just trying to ramp up to the most insanely edgy, crazy stuff you could say to like provoke a reaction. Have you ever heard of something called the aristocrats? It's like a joke, the joke? Oh, yeah, the joke. Yeah, there's a movie on it. Yeah. Okay. Basically every single like shit talk back and forth in the internet was like that. Like what is the most increasingly depraved and back then you didn't get banned for slurs or anything on any of these chat rooms. So it was just like insane world to walk into. And I was fully 100% a part of a product of and a contributor to that world. So that probably still goes on on the internet in some way, and that probably still goes on the internet in maybe more pacified way. Only in darker parts of the internet. I'd say for the most part, most well compared to back then compared to 20 years ago, the internet is way cleaned up now. There are still going to be boards you can go on or parts of the internet where you see that type of humor, but not nowhere near as mainstream. Like back then you could open your mic on Xbox live and hear some insane stuff when that first started nowhere near what you hear today. Although, there's still elements of escalation that happened that just seems to be part of human nature on the internet. Because we don't get the feedback of actually hurting people directly. So the trolling, for the laws, you'll do like, you will still escalate within the bounds. You're just saying that there's more bounds now on Reddit, there's more bounds and so on. So there's moderators that kind of yell at you that ban you and so on if you cross those bounds.

Offensive Language And Humor

On dark humor making fun of dark situations (01:14:26)

But overall, that basic human instinct to escalate, especially under the veil of anonymity is still there. I don't know, it's dark. It's dark. Yeah, there's a lot of different ways to look at it. And there's different ways you can break that art. For instance, you mentioned dark humor and you say that sometimes dark humor is funny and sometimes it's not. I think that it's really important to dig in to and figure out why certain things are funny and why certain things. Give me an example. Yeah, go. It's from your subreddit. Oh boy. No, that made me laugh and I felt wrong about it. Oh no. So this is a... I'm not, I already know what this is. Yeah. So this is a trolley problem. To me, it connects because I think about the... It keeps... Because I worked on autonomous vehicles, the trolley problem, the philosophical thought experiment keeps brought up a lot. When AI is part of making the decision, do I kill three people here or five people here and AI makes that decision. How do you do that calculus? And this particular... There's a deep satire to reveal some kind of flaw in society. I feel like that's what dark humor does. Successful dark humor does. And I love this flaw. I feel like certain... There's a certain brand of dark humor and I think the reason... I think the reason is why it's good or why it is good humor. I think it's because I don't think it necessarily reveals a flaw. Sometimes I feel like it reveals like a kind of virtue, I think. Like if you look at this particular thing... Can I explain what we're looking for? Yeah, go for it. Oh yeah, sure. Just listening. The title of the verteposes, you know what to pick. And it says five people are going to die either way, but if you flip the lever, the trolley will do a sick fucking loop first. And also the top comment is a question saying, which I think is also part of the dark humor that's successful. Man. Can I get the gender and ethnic backgrounds of the groups first? And the top answer is both groups are each comprised of five white orphaned cis male heavy meth users who are consistently in and out of drug rehab, all who identifies right wing extremists. Humor is such a sophisticated thing that we engage in. Humor is like really complicated. But I would argue that like hopefully the humor here shows the virtue of like this is obviously horrible, but that's kind of why it's funny.


It's funny because it's such a horrible question to ask. Like do we kill five people in a boring way or in a really entertaining way? And it's like that's really, that's really... And then when you ask even more like what are the ethnic backgrounds? Like that's even worse to say that, you know? So I feel like that's like the type of... There's a way that you can engage with dark humor where it's like oof, like it's funny because it's so wrong and so taboo. And we all know that it's wrong and taboo and that's kind of where the shared laugh comes from. So for me, the question that asking the diversity question is a sophisticated way of revealing the absurdity of asking about diversity when it's talking about human life. Oh interesting because the way that I took that was, I think it reveals the absurdity of how people will weigh different ethnic backgrounds so differently when it comes to value of human life. Like I'm actually thinking of that in terms of like a an immigration related question where people are really keen and quick to dehumanize like black or brown people. So like the question is like, well if five of them are brown and five are white, well I know which one I'm gonna pull the lever for. That's how I read that. But it's satirizing that aspect. Yeah exactly. Yes of course. But that's what I mean. That's the flaw. To me at least it showed that humanity or social networks that are easy to be outraged and love the outrage and the chaos that Twitter and social networks will pull that lever. Like they would always try to maximize the fun. And there's like there's a sick aspect to all the atrocities, all the tragedies that happen in the world that we kind of always lean towards the outrageous narrative we've drowned it. The one that leads to sort of the most clicks to the most attention to the most outraged to all the kinds of stuff. So that's almost like a satire of society when they are faced with tragedy, they will maximize trying to think of a word that's not fun. But entertainment. Maximize the entertainment. Yeah. There's a big criticism I give especially to conservative crowds. You know left-leaning people, everybody doesn't. I don't like when people blame the media for the state of the media today. I very much believe that everything in society is a feedback loop and that if you're really unhappy with the state of the media, I think that the media is a good reflection for what people want to see. Because there is a room right now in the United States where somebody could start a company where all they do is completely factual reporting. They don't have a political slant and they're not giving you these like sensationalist narratives or stories and that media company would fail in two weeks because people don't want to see that. Generally, people really want to see the like show me the guy that really believes in what I say that calls the other guy an idiot, the guy that are screaming on TV or on the radio like this is what I really want. And people will engage in that and that feedback loop will continue for generations. And then all of a sudden people are like, "Why is the media so biased? Why is the media driving so many narratives?" And it's like, "Well, what do you mean? This is exactly what you want to see?" And that's frustrating for me. That's one of my big kind of when I defend establishments or when I talk about like the interplay between citizen and all these institutions we have that the institutions are very much a reflection of the population, at least in democratic societies. And I think that people very much try to elude the personal responsibility or the country's responsibility to why some of them look the way that they do. But that takes us back to the N word with a hard R. Sure.


Why? For the particular examples that I was giving, for the particular conversations that I was having, if you're going to have challenging conversations around certain words, I think you should probably be able to say them otherwise it feels really ridiculous to me. That's like why- You still believe that. For- Yes, and not like calling people those words, but in having conversations about those words, I would say that I still believe I am. But don't you think, as you said, that using those words actually gives motivation and strength to people who have hate in their hearts? I think depending on the context of what's going on, I think that that's going to be a big driver in terms of how people are going to perceive R. Tech. So in a conversation about the N word, and I don't think I would normally say the N word, we would just talk about the word much the same way that like in a movie, like in Django, people use the N word. Should that be censored in that movie or in the context of that movie, is it being employed in a way where these aren't good people, you're not supposed to like them and that's what the audience walks away with. Yeah, but that context is different than conversation. It feels like in conversation, you using that word normalizes it. And that normalizing that word is going to make it easier for people who use that word in a hateful way to use it. Same with the F word, the F slur. If you use that casually and normalize it in a way that's not hateful, you use it in a way that's not hateful, but the side effect is it normalizes it than people who do use it in a hateful way will be more likely to use it. Therefore, the mathematically looking at the equation of the number of times the N word or the F word is used throughout the world, it increases the number of times it's used in a hateful way. Yeah, I think that you're part of that problem, Stephen. I don't agree. I understand the thought process, but I don't know if using certain words within different contexts is going to necessarily normalize like the hateful use of that word. That is an argument that I've heard people use. Somebody will say like, okay, well, hold on, that should never be used ever because by virtue of you normalizing it, even in an inoffensive environment, you increase the proclivity for people to use it in a potentially more offensive environment. My argument is always like, no, I don't think that crossover exists, but if you did want to take that argument and maybe you do feel this way, I think that you get really problematic when you run into communities that do use certain words that people would say, well, they should be allowed to do it. For instance, if you think that any utterance of the N word at all is highly problematic and might increase hatred, then the entire wrap industry has to dramatically change the way that they engage with the N word. Obviously, a lot of people that criticize people's use of the N word aren't going to turn to rappers and say, well, you guys can't say it either. No, it's who uses the N word. It's not just the word. It is context dependent, but I would say that you as a white person, having conversations, the context there is the kind that would lead to any increase in hate. Do you think the N word should be censored in the dictionary? No, and I believe there's a Wikipedia page on it and it's not censored. Yeah, I don't know. I think it should be in the dictionary. I think the context of casual conversation, like I said, I just believe that on the internet, having humor, having fun conversations as you have on your streams, that leads to the normalization of the word without any educational value. I would agree with that. I think I would agree with that. No, sorry. There's a difference between F's learned N word and both, I think, should not be used in a fun way, but the F word was used in a fun way for a long time.

Critiquing the Casual Use of Offensive Language (01:23:42)

I'll tell you something that bothers me about your streams, your streams and basically every other stream is the casual use of the R word. Oh, the ableism, yeah. I don't know if it's about the able. I don't even know. Listen, it's complicated. I'm not like virtue signaling here. No, ableism isn't virtue signal. I mean, it's a legitimate, like I get emails from fans that say like, Hey, like I deal with this particular issue. Every time you use this word, kind of feels like you're attacking me. Like just like, so it's not, it's a valid concept. Yeah. It's just something cuts wrong for me. Like, for example, I'm not bothered by, I am bothered by the excessive use of the word fuck. Okay. But not in the same way that moderate use of the word fuck. What is it I'm curious in? When somebody calls somebody in R word, what is it that what is the feeling that you get that makes you feel bad about it? It's signals to me that you don't give a damn about people who are struggling in ways that you are not struggling. Like that, that signals to me, like about the experience of others. Do you think that there are other words also that could convey like a similar feeling to your wife? Because it feels like you've drawn a pretty special circle around, because like I imagine I go, Oh, this guy's you're an uneducated dumb fucker. You're a networker. Like those were that that's circle keeps changing, which you can, which is fine. I think that's what the whole point with the culture. So I'm trying to feel my feeling is a kind of, you know, I'm a human being that exists in a social context that we're all evolving that language together and just feels wrong. Like, you know, word bitch, for example, it really, I've heard on your streams and in general, calling a woman a stupid bitch really bothers me. But it's not just the word bitch, it's context. Like, for example, me person, I'm speaking to me personally, like badass bitch is different than stupid bitch. Sure. Like a bad bitch or something is different than, yeah, of course. Way different. Sure. I think it speaks to a bigger sense of civility and respect for human beings that are not like you. That's what that's, that's the feeling that I'm bothering. And so I guess what what I'm trying to say here is, just because people speak in this kind of way in the gaming world and streams, doesn't mean that you, like a lot of people look up to you. It doesn't mean young people, especially. It doesn't mean that you don't have the responsibility to sort of stand alone from the crowd because you're somebody that values the power of effective discourse. And to be effective discourse, there's some level of civility. So you can be the sort of the beacon of civility in that world versus giving into the derogatory words. Because like, you have to, you have to lift people out of that world, out of the muck of what I would say is like drama in an ineffective discourse. It's like, I think that's one of your missions, right, is like, to inspire the world through conversation, through debate, through effective discourse. Yeah. So I guess I'm just calling out that I think using our word for me personally, as a fan that, that believes in your mission, it just makes you look ineffective and bad and uninspiring to young people that look up to you. Because those young people are going to use those words that you're using and they'll do it much less effectively. Sure.

Are Neurons and Language Evolving at Equal Paces? (01:27:30)

This is the problem. Yeah, I guess the challenge is always just finding the line. My vocabulary shifted dramatically from, even from two or three years ago, I think my vocabulary shifted quite a bit as we've gotten rid of some words and some things are kind of coming out. The R word is one that has kind of gone out and come back and gone out and come back. That one we've definitely gone back and forth on. I know there are different thoughts about it and different communities on the internet. This isn't, I mean, I'm just telling you, for me, it cuts, and I'm not a social justice warrior type. It cuts pretty hard. So you're saying that I'm going to lose a subscriber if I'm... No, it's not a subscriber. I know, I'm just kidding. I actually have to empathize harder because I'm like, maybe this is not a very good person. That's what I feel. If you're so carelessly using that word, then maybe you're not actually thinking deeply about the suffering in the world. To be a student of human nature, you really have to think about other humans and other experiences that are unlike your own. Yeah, of course. And so that's the sense I get. But at the same time, you're also the grandpa, I mean, ages, who's trying to be cool with young kids. A lot of the reason young kids look up to you is you also know the language of the internet. Yeah, but I mean, that's not an excuse to use words that we think shouldn't be used. I guess the question that I would have, because it's always a struggle, and to some extent, it's kind of happened, is let's say that like three years ago, I would have said I'm no longer saying the artwork. I'm just going to get rid of that in my vocabulary. Like, is there a chance that today we would be having a conversation about like, why do you call people dumbfucks? Is that really appropriate? Like, this is a tack at the core of like somebody's like level of intelligence, education, opportunities in life?

What is the purpose of derogatory words? (01:29:07)

Like, is that a worthy? You don't think so? I think that's a, as the kids say, cope. You really think so? I think that's because the words have definitely moved in a way where it's like, this was okay, now it's not this. So you're standing your ground by using, listen, you could, you could, you could, but I think it's better to use those words if you want to defend the ground word stand on, to use them rarely and deliberately versus how you currently use them, which is to express an emotion. Like, you, I'm going to be honest, you use our word, not when you're at your best. True. And so that's not, that's generally that can be true for a lot of swearing to that, but yeah, I know, but like, you know that our word is offensive, you know, and there's part of it is like, the, you tell yourself that like, you're still kind of fighting political correctness by using it a little bit when you say it. No, I don't think so. I think, I'm trying, I try not to think in terms of like, where is the virtue where like, there's a whole bunch of arguments for why some words are okay, some words are okay, or whatever. And I try to like, think more along those lines rather than, but um, like, there's going to be like a lot of phrases where like, if the R word has come out, the conversation is over. Like, I know that like things, my brain is shut down the person sometimes is, but there's like a, there's a lot of words also in terms of like, it like, if you ever hear me say like fucking moron in a debate, it's like, it's done like this conversation is over. There's no way that anything productive is happening past that point. I think fucking moron is not, I think it's ineffective. It's not civil, but it's not, it doesn't bother me in the way. It's basically when you speak in a way that I know there's a group that's going to be heard by that. Not only do I think about the hurt that group experiences, I think of you as a lesser intellectual, like as a lesser person who's thinking about the world. What bothers me the most is just what kind of mindset that inspires in young people, or especially when you're in a public figuring a lot of people look up to you. So I definitely don't think sort of this idea, the R word is not the battleground of expanding the Orton window of discourse. Okay, like I don't think it'll lead to dumb fuck being canceled two years later, unless that word is hurting people's experience, which I don't foresee that happening. I think legitimately our word and F slur and calling women bitches, context matters here too, like of course, but just the way I've heard you use it, it is not it's from emotion and it's from frustration and it ultimately is rooted in disrespect. I don't, I think it's ineffective. And of course, like who gets to say, I don't know, but I'm saying somebody who would like I admire effective conversations and I admire great humor, dark humor, wit. To me, oftentimes the use of the R word in the way you've used it in the way I see the community use it is none of those things. It contributes not at all to the humor and so on. Now I could see it might contribute to the to the camaraderie of that particular group, especially when they normalize the use of that word. You kind of take some of the edge off, but you forget that there's a large number of other people that don't have the chemistry, that don't hear the music of the friendship that you have, the relationship you have. And instead they hear the normalization of a hateful word and it ultimately has an impact that's hateful. And then people like me who show up, you know, I haven't watched much of your stuff. It turns me off from like a couple of times your content came before me, like, and I listened to it a little bit, turned me off completely. I didn't understand how good your heart is. I didn't understand how your mission of actually de-radicalized people help people like you're and increased the level of good faith discourse in the world. I didn't understand any of that because like what I was hearing is pretty rough, like the R word type of stuff. And I just feel like the benefit cost analysis is heavy on the cost. I just have to sort of call this out. I think and straight up think it's wrong, but that's my own. Why do you think it's wrong? Because it's hurting people without any benefit to you whatsoever. When you say hurting people, do you mean the person I'm using it at or do you think there's like the third group? It's good feedback, right? I always consider everything, especially I respect you like you're a really smart guy. Something that I always kind of like fight over in terms of like language or like who to attack or what to attack or what to do is that it's very hard to draw like what boxes are okay to insult people on versus one aren't. So for instance, if I call somebody like a Nazi with a lot of vitriol, I am okay with every single Nazi being negatively affected by that because that category intrinsically calls upon at some level of more condemnation for me, right? Whereas like if I'm out there, I try not to do like image related jokes, right? I don't want to call you like, oh, you're a fat fucking loser because there's a lot of people that are fat that are overweight, where I don't want them to feel bad. I don't want them. I'm not trying to call you out or like insult you. So there's like a lot of, you say cost benefit. I like a lot of collateral damage from a word like that where there's no purpose in doing that. So certain words are easy to get rid of. They're off the table, right? Eppsler and word like these are not words you call people because there's so much collateral. It's not worth it. We've got some words where it's like if you have some form of like mental thing, it is a bad thing. You're not a bad person, but just using that word could feel like a collateral damage to those people. And then there's other categories of words. So like if I say that like this person is like, they're a stupid fucking Republican, right? There's probably some Republicans that aren't dumb that I don't want to feel called out by that. Like are those types of phrases that you think should be completely removed as well? Or I'm kind of curious. So this completely removed just so we're clear. Yeah. I'm not referring to censorship. Oh, no, I'm not even talking about this. I'm just a person like emotionally like removed is the wrong word though. Like I care about like, I'm not trying to listen to people on the internet saying like you shouldn't say that word.

Discourse And Empathy

Can swearing good for us? (01:35:32)

That's not good. I mean, I'm trying to look to your mind and heart. What you're talking today is you're betraying your gift. You're better than this. You think it's indicative of like a more flip and thought process where it's like the only way you can say that word is if you're ignoring the hurt and suffering of those people. And if you're somebody that says those people, you're ignoring the state of language. Because I think you're getting to the point because it's not about a single word. It's about like a it's music. And I just feel like there's all no, it's a it's a strong note that ruins the melody. Gotcha. And I don't think I can say, you know, you shouldn't use the R word or whatever. I'm just speaking to I'm just listening to music and reviewing the final result. It's not necessarily because maybe one use of the word the R word strategically or part of an actual like, when you've built up a camaraderie that's sandwiched in like some love, but then you try to reveal there. I guess you're talking about a lot of there's a bunch of drama. You have friends with whom you're worrying and stuff. And they're all a little bit beautifully insane. And you've said that you are becoming more and more insane. It's beautiful to watch. It's the human condition laid before us. Wonderful. And some of that is swearing and so on. So it's a tricky thing. But the whole skill of discourse, just like it is with dark humor is walking that line and just feel like it's a overuse of the R word. And I don't want to die in that groggers. I don't think it's that represent like there's certain things like that. It feels like it ruins the music. And I don't, you know, it's just saying like a dumb Republican or dumb Democrat.

Why calling people bots ruins discourse (01:37:20)

I don't. Yeah, that ruins it too a little bit depends on how you use it. You can be lazy with that. You know, like even overuse of the word, I think bots is what's used for people who don't think or something. I don't actually know the definition. I'm offended on the on behalf of robots. And that might be a compliment soon. Right. Yeah. Exactly. What I guess bot means you don't think. Yeah, you're like an NPC. You just copy and see. Again, I'm a fan of behalf of NPCs. I come myself as one. But there's a sense if you say bots too much that you're just dismissing people like everything I say is right. And anyone that disagrees when he's a bot. That's lazy too. Sometimes funny. Sometimes it's effective. Basically saying a lot of people in the mainstream media or something like that are bots. Okay, that's a little bit of that is effective. But too much it becomes ineffective. And I'm trying to speak to that. Yeah. And I'm just the reason we're highlighting clear examples like the N word. Joe Rogan had to contend with that. Hi, yeah. I think it's ineffective. It makes you less effective at discourse. But like you've talked about me a ton as language is a tricky one. It's always hard because you talk about like constructing a melody. There's not one melody that sounds good to everyone. But there are probably certain notes that like if you got rid of them, everybody's still going to like it about as much. And you don't really lose anything. There's a whole other part of an audience that might be more willing to listen. Yeah, of course. And it's not about losing the magic of that melody. Like you don't want to be vanilla. I just feel like there's stuff that doesn't need to be there. Yeah, for sure. It's fat. But then again, the other thing that people should understand that might be listening to this, you're streaming many hours a day for many years. I don't know. 11 or 12, I think. Yeah. It started in 2010. And so one of the things that people can do is just clip out anything. You're going through the full human experience of emotion. Anger, fear, frustration, all of it. So of course, there's going to be moments when you're not the best version of yourself. Anything else to say about the language? It's complicated. I'm still always trying to figure it out. There are opinions that I have that have changed throughout the years. It's possible that the artwork has always been the next one on the chopping block that we're all kind of looking at. But people always worried about that treadmill. But it's possible in a year to have a different view on it or all have changed away some of the words I use. And yeah, it's definitely like a it's always like a work in progress. There's always like different communities that feel different ways about different words. Yeah. But do you acknowledge that there's people out there that are never going to talk to you? They're never going to think of you as a good man because you use the on and word with a hard R. Probably in the past.

How to meet in the middle about controversial language (01:40:06)

I mean, yeah, those people exist. But I mean, there are some people that are beyond my reach, which I'm okay with. Like there's going to be some people because of things that have been involved or even ideas that I have now that might make them beyond my reach. Something you said earlier is very true. I think the goal is to like identify what are the elements that you can cut out that aren't integral to your message, but could be alienating to more people. And those are probably the things that you identify. But I think that you can get lost in yourself or lost in the internet or lost in the outside of yourself if you're trying to appeal to every single person. It's just never going to be the case. And for I actually, I like that I've had the journey that I've had on the internet that you can find me saying and defending a lot of insane stuff 10 years ago, because I think it shows like a level of progress. And I think I do get a lot of respect and buy into certain communities, where it's like, I'm not just some random dude telling you that like, oh, you shouldn't say, you know, the F word or the N word, like, I'm a guy that's been there that's done it, that's defended it. And you can see my whole past, my whole history has laid bare for you to watch every of thousands of hours of it. But I can show that like there's growth and evolution and change that can happen in a person. So yeah, and you're honest about that growth. It's tricky thing, because people just call, bring up stuff from your past. For sure. I hope we figure out as a civilization, a mechanism to clearly say this was, this was me two years ago, this was me five years ago, I'm a different person. And like, because Twitter doesn't care about that, these social mechanisms that bring stuff up doesn't care about that. It's like one stupid thing you say, it becomes like a scarlet letter. And I don't know how to fight that, it's tricky to fight that. Have you ever seen men in black? Yes. When Kane Jair on the bench, and he says a person is smart, but people are stupid, dumb finicky animals or whatever, there's something that changes for human dynamics when there is a group of people that make it so hard to control. Like, I think one on one, anybody can sit across on somebody and admit to some horrible stuff. I used to be, you know, I abused my husband when I was, you know, 20 and 35 and I see it's wrong. I did this, I was addicted to whatever and you know, I made these mistakes of one on one, it's always easy. But in group environments that in group, out group, tribalistic thing of like identifying one thing and then coming to destroy a person's life is like, it's such a huge, like impulse we have. And I think probably when we were like hunter gatherers in the forest, it's probably good because you really want to push weird people out or anything like that. But now on the internet, when we can hunt for any dissenting opinion and just with ruthless precision, destroy somebody's life over it, it's a pretty scary dynamic. I think one of the mechanisms that could fix it is make it super easy for each individual person to analyze all the stupid shit they themselves have said in the past, like a full recording. Because I think people are just honestly paying to very rosy picture to their own brain of who they have been in the past. Yeah, of course. If we can have empathy for the fact that we've said stupid shit, or we're drunk, the ridiculous things you say, the offensive things you might have said, the offensive things you might have done, I just feel like that would give us the ammunition to have empathy for others that are like, okay, yeah, this guy five years ago said this. Maybe that doesn't represent them who doesn't represent who they are anymore than stuff I said five years ago represents who I am today. I feel like technology can actually enable that. Maybe, although you're talking about more recording and more stuff, which people already wear, yeah, but it's a double edged sword. I think there is going to be more and more recording. We have to figure out how to do that in the way that respects people privacy and gives them ownership of their data and so on. I've looked at the search history I've done on Google, which for most people is available, like your Google search history. And it's fascinating to watch the evolution of a human being. Like it doesn't seem like the same person, like a different person. For sure. It's weird. It's also hard to with the internet today. I'm going to be ages again, but like now all of the people are thrown together, you know, whereas like, like I don't want a 27 year old judging. There you go again. Like a 15 or 16 year old, like obviously he's in high school. Like there is that story that came out of the, there was a kid that saved the recording of, I think it was like some white girl. I think that she like got her driver's license and she's like, I can drive now and words with the A or whatever, dumb, she shouldn't have said it. But I think she was like 15 or 16 when she tick tock this or whatever. And he held on and that recording until she applied and got accepted to college three years later. And then he released it to get her kicked out of college. And I'm like, damn, everything that I had ever said as like a 15, 16 year old was like immortalized on the internet. My life wouldn't have even begun. Because those are insanely high standards to hold people to. Not that like obviously you shouldn't be saying those, you shouldn't be saying certain words or whatever, but you have to be able to make mistakes and out of lessons like everybody does. We all did. Everybody did it growing up, you know. What do you think there's so much misogyny in the streaming community? And how can you fight it?

Would Destiny change his mind on this now? (01:45:07)

Because you've shown a lot of interest in fighting it, trying to decrease or eliminate misogyny from your community. I think it's really difficult. I think that eliminating racism is easier than eliminating misogyny. Because I'm the intern that you mean on anywhere. Because I think fundamentally, I don't think there's that much difference between like white people and black people and brown people and Asian people or whatever. You know, we have different cultures to stop at the end of the day, we're all people. But I think there are differences between men and women, like throughout all of history and time, and then even today and every culture. And when real differences do exist, it's harder to account for them in a way that can we have conversations with each other without it becoming very gendered in a negative way, right? Negative way of generating something, be like a misogynistic way of doing it. Of course, it's unclear to me that it's so difficult to avoid the negative gendering versus the positive. Because there's a lot of positive to the tension, the dance between the different genders and so on. Maybe in this particular moment in history, it's not, but it's not trivial to me that racism is easier to eliminate. It's an interesting hypothesis just because there's more biological difference between men and women. That means it's harder to eliminate, but I don't know if this is true. I hear this a lot. I feel like I read this more, but I need to get a better source of our repeated everywhere. I've heard that in the US military, for instance, they've gotten exceedingly well, they do an exceedingly good job at getting different people of different races to integrate. And it's not a huge problem once you're through basic training and all the training, everything. But for a different sex, as it still represents a significant problem, the military hasn't figured out. And I actually looked at what's the military doing? Because if something was solvable, like, can we sleep for four hours tonight and be healthy? If we could, I bet the military would know. So I kind of look sometimes to them to see their integration. But it might be that there are other issues there that make it... Yeah, it feels like the military is a very particular kind of... For sure. Yeah, it could be. The actual task and hand might bias the difficulty of the process. Potentially, yeah. There's been a lot of interesting talk about women integrating into male groups. And how do you do this in a way where everybody is happy with the outcome? And there's not issues. I think Jordan Peterson spoke about this a little bit. And then workplace culture speaks about this a bit. Would you happen to remember? I want to say it was like five or 10 years ago, there was a big tech conference. And there were two guys behind a woman, and they made a joke about a USB dongle. Like dongle was a dick. And this woman turned around, she tweeted pictures of them, spoke about misogyny of them. And then that blew up into a huge ordeal that there was this interesting phenomenon that in a less misogynistic and more inclusive workplace environment, some women might end up feeling worse because in a more misogynistic environment, you're thinking like, "Okay, that's a woman. She doesn't get our humor. I'm going to treat her in a very indifferent, very dispassionate, cold way, and whatever. And then I'm going to have my boys over here." And then you've got these environments where they're a little bit more warmer, and it's like, "Oh, cool. We're going to bring this woman into our environment, and we're going to make all the same types of like crash jokes we did before." And it's actually worse now. Another woman feels even more otherwise because like, "Oh my God, why do you talk like this?" I think that internet communities, especially online ones that do like political debate and video games, are very much like big boys clubs. So it's not enough to just say, "You can't be misogynistic to get rid of misogyny. There's always going to be an othering effect on women." There's a lot of like behaviors that are unintuitive that you have to account for, and you've got to try to like push that back. And that's just a very, very challenging thing to do. So like, I like to deal with concrete examples more. So here's a concrete example. And this is like a recent initiative in my community because I'm trying to like be because misogyny hasn't been fixed anywhere in the internet. I'm curious, well, there are ways that I can push my community to do this. I don't think you should almost ever make a comment on a woman's appearance ever if they're appearing in like some political or professional manner. Even if it's a positive comment, I think it's equally bad to a negative comment. It's just never good to do. And that's kind of an unintuitive thing because it's like, well, a woman appears, "Wow, she's really cute." It seems like a nice comment. You're being nice, you know? She looks cute at her, but it's like, it's not at all the point of why she's there. And just by saying that you're kind of like, "Otherizing her is like a person to like think she looks good rather than listening to anything she has to say." You know? Well, there's a lot of stuff that you're saying and that is a part of massaging. It's almost like obvious. Like any woman will tell you that. Woman will, yeah, but they're not in these spaces and a lot of the guidance don't know. But I think what that requires is just empathy. You don't need to consider the female experience. That's it. You have to either read about or talk with women. You learn like the low-hanging food is very easy to learn. It feels like just the level of social skill oftentimes in internet communities is quite low. I disagree. I don't like to say, here's the problem with empathy is it's very hard to have empathy for experiences that are so outside of your own. Well, maybe some people, there might be some people that can do it. I can't. There's a lot of stuff that I had to learn. Women are half the population, but they're women. They're totally different. So here, we talk about, yeah, yeah. This is not totally different. So here's an ex, okay? So, especially for me, my archetype makes up a lot of the internet. White man. There's never been a point, the name of a beautiful woman who might be a dancer.

Empathy (01:50:20)

What's the backstory from New Orleans or? I haven't thought that through yet. Yeah. It's ambiguous. Okay. Like an open world. It's an open world. I want you to project whatever you want destiny the dancer to be from. That's in your mind. Okay. All right. I'll save that for later tonight. Yeah. Okay. As a white guy, I don't know if there's ever been a spot that I've been in, where I've been made to feel like I don't belong there just by virtue of who I am. I don't, I actually don't, it's impossible for me to empathize that because I don't even have that experience. If you go back eight, nine years, one of the big issues that came up was harassment and gaming against women. And I was one of the big debaters against that saying that like, sure, women might get harassment, but everybody gets harassment. If you're a woman and you're in gaming and you get harassed, congratulations, you're being treated like a man. What you're actually asking for is for us to actually treat you differently. You don't want to be insulted. You don't want to be treated like a man. And that's actually misogyny is women making that argument. You still stand by that? Is that a problem if I do? No, I'm just kidding. Well, okay. Well, hold on a little. So a little while I disagree with it. Sure. Okay. That's good. You should. A little while later, I had a friend, Jessica, super cool girl. We go to play games. She was between jobs. And she's like, I've got like two months and we're going to grind CSGO. And I'm like, okay, this is awesome. Let's do it. CSGO counter strike, global offensive shooter game, FPS microphones. First day we start playing, okay, hop into our first game. Obviously she talks. Everybody's making is out of 12 year old boy. Why aren't you making sandwiches? Blah, blah, blah. Yeah. Okay, whatever. Play our first game, play our second game, same jokes, third game, fourth game. By like the fourth or fifth game, I was actually starting to feel triggered. Like every time the game started, I was like, can you just like talk so we can get over like the stupid fucking jokes is so fucking stupid. And you hear the same fucking joke every single time. And it took one day of that experience for me to realize it's not about being insulted. It's like this othering feeling that you don't belong. I've never felt that because I'm a white guy. Like it's just not to be like virtue singular. But like there's just there's no places where it's like, you're white, you don't belong here, you're a guy, you don't belong here. Like I've never felt that non-inclusion. And playing with her, there's a different feeling when it's the same types of jokes coming from a group of people to make you feel like you don't belong there. Where I was like, damn, this actually feels really bad.

Writing Insults for Random People (01:52:42)

And it feels bad in a different way where it's like if you call me like an F slur or any other type of swear word or insult, like yeah, you can call me that. But at the end of the day, like we're all kind of the same, we're all white dudes and we call each other names. But like this is a woman. And this is not her place and she doesn't belong here. Kind of the analogy that I would make, because I after getting these experiences, I would learn this afterwards. If I tell you that there's another guy in a room and you need to think of the worst insults ever for that person, without ever knowing anything about them or meeting them, if I tell you that it's like a white straight guy and you have to write insults, you're fucked. Maybe you can do like school shooter, but there's not really much you can say at the end of the day. But if I tell you it's a woman, whoa, we could, there are so many different jokes on your right. If it's a black person, so many different races, things we can set it. Sure. I can come up with a lot of stuff for a white guy. In terms of stuff that is just intrinsic to him being a white guy. Yeah, like there's... Really? Wait a minute. What are you talking about? There's a lot. The internet has sharpened that sword. In terms of like jokes that are targeted at his sex or problems. Incel, virgin, weak. Some of the incel virgin, maybe. Yeah, that's getting there. Sure. That's for sure. That's recent though. Sorry, I'm older on the internet. We didn't have those words way back then. That wasn't the best game. When I was making these analogies, that incel and virgin, it was like, "That's my day. We didn't have a general relativity." We didn't, there were no incels back then. None of us had sex. We just accepted it. We were all computer gamers. Nobody had sex to play video games back then. Okay? People don't remember that. There wasn't the Big Bang Theory. You were just a loser that was stuck. I guess you even know sex exists as weakly. Exactly. Yeah. We had to download sexual pictures in like two minutes. And you didn't even know if you were going to get the right thing by the time it finished loading. But what I'm saying is that like, okay, I think you agree that like, if somebody gives you like a race, like a black person who's a woman, we can write like very cutting, scathing like insults for that person that are very other rising. Oh, words that would really hurt. Yeah, that are very cutting to the person. But like for a white guy, it's kind of hard because it's like, that's like the default. There's not as much other rising of those people. Yeah. So the insults you have from white guy to white guy, the insults are much harsher. So when you start to apply the same kind of harshness to other groups, you can make them feel like they really don't belong. And that other rising effect is something that's very hard for me. I can't really empathize it because I never felt it. So I have to intellectualize it and then sympathize with it. It's like a whole process I have to go through. And then I try to walk other people through that because if you're a white guy on the internet, which is a lot of the internet, you really don't know what that feels like. You've never felt like that before.

Institutional Bias And Power

Attacks on the Internet are Gendered (01:55:01)

Well, so you're now in a leadership position, grandpa destiny. So that's a lot of people who come to you for that, for that sort of pathway to empathy. Yeah. I'm not to otherwise. I mean, you have felt otherwise. And you mentioned high school people like not being. Yeah, but those are always for things that like it's different to insult somebody for an unamutable characteristic. Like, okay, you think poorly about me because I'm not enough money, or I don't have money, but I could get more money and I could change that. But it's different for somebody to really attack you for your gender or attack you for your race. A lot of the attacks that hit the hardest is not about gender. I do think that the way women are attacked on the internet, it's the same kind of attacks you would do towards other guys, but you go harsher. I feel like they're fundamentally different. I feel like when we're attacking guys, I'm not usually attacking you on like the virtue of you being a guy. But like, if it's a woman and she's typing, saying like, oh, did your boyfriend type that for you? Or like, what are you even doing here? Like, don't you? Shouldn't you be trying to find a husband or like, oh, you're like a stupid kind of like, go start an only fans or whatever. No, but the stupidity, the intelligence aspect is what's attacked. Yeah, but it's so much different. Like you can call a guy stupid, but that's because he's a guy that's being stupid. But when you call a woman stupid, she's stupid because she's a woman. Yeah, but I honestly think that women are called stupid more than men on the internet. Mm-hmm. But I've nothing to do. Like the attack is not gendered. It's the gender inspires an increased level of attack. I feel like it is gendered. I wish we had data on this. Have you ever heard of the XKCD comics? Yes. It's a really good comic where, and this is something that I've dealt with a lot in my community, okay? There's a guy at a board and he fucks up a math equation and it's like, wow, you suck at math. And then the next panelist, there's a girl that does it and she fucks it up and it's like, wow, women suck at math. And there's like that feeling that happens where when I bring on, I won't use names, but there are like YouTube people that I've brought on that have crazy opinions. And when they're men, that person is crazy. Oh my god. He said the crazy stuff. He's so dumb. He's so crazy. He's so stupid. But when it's a woman, it's like, oh my god, why do you always bring dumb women here? Why do so many women on the internet have crazy opinions? There's a different minority character that has to like stand it and like represent like their whole group where like white men don't typically have to. Speaking of groups versus individuals, yes. But then what I feel happens is then another person from that group comes, another woman comes and people before she says anything will already feel like they're ready with that attack. For sure. But they're ready for the attack because she's a woman. They're going to call her she stupid because she's a woman, not because she says something they're just because she's a woman. So like the group in their brain accumulates all the negative characteristics of the individuals they've met, not the positive, the negative. And it becomes like this ball of stickiness. And then that becomes the bias for their judgment of a new person that comes with white men. There's more of a blank slate in terms of bias of how they analyze the person. With any, any of the minority group, they're basically make a judgment based on the negative characteristics of the individuals that men in the past. That leads to a system where you're just harsher towards minority groups and towards women.

How do you solve institutional bias? (01:58:21)

How do you solve that? The first, the most important thing for any problem ever is step one is to be aware of it. If you're not aware of it, then you're hopelessly lost at sea. But the first thing I like to say is she's like be aware of it. Like I've had, there's a girl that I've had on recently and she says a lot of, in my opinion, kind of crazy things. But people will use her as like, this is why women shouldn't be here. This is like, she's crazy and she's a woman and blah, blah, blah. But I can bring on a guy who's just similarly dumb things and he's evaluated on his own merits because it's a guy. There's never ever ever been a case where I brought a stupid guy on stream and everybody's like, this guy makes me hate men. This guy makes me hate white people. That has never happened. But then there's like other women that come on and it's like, now I know why insults exist or I totally understand where red pill ideology comes from. And even if the statements are kind of true, when you're making these observations over and over and over and over again, it damages your ability to individually perceive somebody. And then two people that make the same statements, one can be perceived more harshly just because of that group bias you've got built up. I think there's something about streaming that just brings that out of people. Like, because you have to talk for like seven hours. So you're like, all right, well, whatever psychological issues and complexities I have, I'm going to explore that. They're going to be magnified magnified in the work. And then it's the, as you talked about the memetic theories or Girardian, like whatever the things that are very similar in that you're going to magnify the conflicts that you have and you're going to explore the all the different perspectives on those different conflicts. And I mean, I don't know if it's just anecdotal, but it's nice to have women on stream. I think the dynamic that you guys have is wonderful. It's really interesting. So it's just the female voice in general. I love having women on the podcast. The female voice I feel like is under heard on the internet. For sure. And I would love the internet to be a place where women feel safe to speak.

Case for Institutions, Bureaucracy, and Government (02:00:12)

All right. Given that you're, like we talked about, a progressive with non-standard progressive views, so your very pro-free speech, pro-capitalism. So given that, it's very interesting that you're also pro-establishment and pro-institutions. So right now, if you look at the world, there's a significant distrust of institutions, at least in sort of public intellectual discourse. What is the nature of your support for government and institutions? Can you make the case for and against them? Broadly speaking, there is a synergistic effect when two humans come together. If I can speak very broadly in terms of, we'll say, utility. Okay. My happiness with one person might be 10. The happiness with one person might be 10. When they come together, it's like 50 between the two of them. There's like the synergistic effect when humans work together that the sum is greater than all the individual parts of it, or there's like an emergent thing that happens there. There's a possibility of that. Yeah. A possibility, sure. Things could go really wrong. There could be a cannibalistic tribe that all eats each other. Sure. But for the purposes of this, there's all their failure modes. Okay. Sure. Yeah. But I think broadly speaking, are you going to be the well-actually guy? Okay. If you want to, well, okay. Well, actually. Sometimes cannibalism. Yeah. They're actually good for both. Yeah. Sometimes things do going. But I think broadly speaking, the fact that you're sitting here and clothing that you didn't make, and I'm sitting here on an airplane that I don't know how to fly a bill, like, right, there's a lot of cool stuff that happens when people come together and they make civilizations. And part of that civilization building is the fact that we can specialize, and it's the fact that we can offload a bunch of trust onto third parties that we delegate the power to make important decisions about our lives, right? I don't know anything about how to like build like a combustion engine, but I know that when I push the button on my car, it's going to drive around and the fumes aren't going to kill me, and I can park it in garages and the building is not going to collapse. And the only reason all of this works is because I've offloaded a lot of trust onto these third party things. And I would say that the pillars of these third party things that society is built on are roughly speaking institutions. So that might be the institution of peer review for scientific articles. It might be the institution of voting for government, right, or the ability for us to vote in that whole process. It might be, yeah, all the FDA, like all of the institutions are things that they need to exist because we don't have the time or the capability to individually sort through all of these things individually. We have to rely on some third party to do it. Okay. So you believe at scale, when we're together, we're greater than the sum of our parts. That's the case for institutions. Absolutely. What about the inefficiencies of bureaucracy? Is there some aspect when at scale different dynamics come into play than they do when there's two people together, two people that love each other, the birds and the bees? Is there some aspect that leads more to cannibalism at scale? So the corruption inefficiencies that do to bureaucracy and so on. Bureaucracy, which is not, I hate it when people try to say bureaucracy is government because bureaucracy exists a ton in private environments as well, right, in businesses and everything. Bureaucracy introduces its own set of problems. But I mean, a bureaucracy is necessary because it's coordinating all of the underlying things in order to create something that's greater than the sum of its parts, right? Like all of the software developers in the world are useless without being paired with good designers in order to make their products usable by a person. And the coordination of those people and the coordination of increasingly more and more things necessitate some level of bureaucracy. I think we always say bureaucracy when it's like a bat, it's like a sluramos, like you're a bureaucratic, the bureaucracy is slowing everything down. It's like, sure, the bureaucracy slows things down. But bureaucracy also gives us things like, you know, safe medicine and safe water to drink for most of the US or safe buildings to live in or safe cars to drive. So the managers in institution versus like the software developers and the designers, the managers is the bureaucracy. The reason bureaucracy is used as a slur is that something about human nature leads to bureaucracy often growing, growing indefinitely, becoming less and less efficient without a, I mean, this is what capitalism can come in, that capitalism puts a pressure on the bureaucracy not to grow too much because you want the bureaucracy to be useful, but not large. Yeah. And to be a certain size, you have to be the minimum size to get the job done. And so capitalism provides that mechanism. Government does not always. And so that's the criticism of government of institutions where it can grow without a significant mechanism that says there's a cost to bureaucracy that's not being accounted for here, which is paying for the increasing size of government without the benefit. Yeah. Government is a special institution because it doesn't have to show itself to be financially viable. And we kind of live in a capitalist economy where that's generally the case. So government gets its powers from votes from the people, which introduces a whole new set of possible positives and possible negatives, right? Having something, for instance, that gives food or sheltered homeless people, maybe you don't want that to have to run at a profit. But giving an organization that can self justify its budgets perpetually and indefinitely growing, maybe that's not the best thing. Yeah, we always have to figure out how to do the constraints there.

Constraints on Power (02:05:45)

What about the corrupting nature of power that comes with institutions as well? Absolutely. So then you better pick your style of institution very carefully. I think that the democratic institution we have in the United States today, I think works very well. But I mean, there are other styles of government that have been tried in the past that I think lend themselves more to corruption. Not to say that by the way, there's not corruption in the United States. Of course, there's going to be varying levels of corruption at like all, at all levels. But you run into this interesting problem where authoritarian regimes can act with ruthless precision and swiftness, because they don't have to ask any questions. They just do, do, do, do, do. And that's it. But the problem is, is it's an authoritarian regime. They're prone to missteps. They're slow to respond to changing or evolving needs. There was an interesting study that was put out a while ago that showed that like every single famine that happened around the world, almost 98% of them happen under authoritarian regimes where like freedom of speech is very limited, very rare for a famine to happen under democracy, because press and everything makes the government more responsive to the needs of the people. Power can corrupt their levels of corruption, but you have to have like a system of checks and balances on all of those different levels to make sure it doesn't run off the rails, I guess, and do a sick loop de-loop and you know, half the population gets. Nice call back. There's a lot of people that will listen to you say that the democracy in the United States is working pretty damn well and they will spit out the drink if they're drinking a drink and be very upset. Can you make the case that they're right and you're wrong? Can I make the case that- Can you steal men? They're right. Yeah. Well, the steal man for them is that people have a lot of problems on the day to day and when they look and they see what government is doing, they might see potholes outside their house, homeless people all over their downtown, and the United States just approved another ex-billion amount of dollars for Ukraine. Or they might be living in a city where half the factors are shut down. A lot of their people are out of work, but the president is on the TV talking about how to find jobs for immigrants coming in from Mexico. And for these people, they have problems that exist in their lives. Some of them are paying taxes to alleviate these problems and then when they listen to the government talk, it feels like the government is not responding to the needs that they have. And then that's one problem. Then on top of that, you've got all of these people working in alternative media that can show you, "Well, look at this politician wasting this much money or look at him double speaking here or there. Look at Hillary Clinton saying she's got a private position and a public position. Look at how all of these politicians have family members that are getting rich because of their relationships with people in Congress. Look at the revolving door between capitalist companies and the government. How can you look at all of that, take into account that the government's not responding to your needs and then really feel like it's a government by the people and for the people?" Yeah, this was very good. Good statement and good question. How can you? How can you tell that they're not just politicians that care more about continuously winning the elections versus being a running government effectively? They should care about winning the elections. That's the first misconception. A lot of people say this guy only cares about getting voted in. This guy, he doesn't even believe about in fracking or abortion. He just changes his opinion to get voted in. Anytime somebody says that, you should say, "That's really good. You want them to change their opinions so they get voted in." That's the whole point of the democracy. You don't want them to be remained obstinate. You don't want them to say, "I'm not changing my opinion no matter what the people want." You want them to evolve and adopt new opinions based on what the population, their constituents are voting for. The cynical take is that on the surface they're changing their opinion, but that there's a boys club where boys means the elite that under in the smoke field rooms in secret they actually have their own agenda and they're following that agenda and they're just saying anything publicly to placate the public based on whatever the new trends are. Here's the cynical take a pull-up of the Senate. Somebody asked me this question and it flipped. I won 80 completely. I was a Bernie Sanders supporter in 2016 and my single issue voting thing was lobbying. I thought that lobbying, the government's corrupt, they weren't responding to these people. It was completely destroyed, my faith in government and everything. I had one question posed to me by a conservative that used to come on my streaming channel and he said, "Can you think of any popular opinion that the American public has that the government is unresponsive to? Is there some big piece of legislation or policy or whatever that people want that the government isn't doing?" They asked me that. I couldn't think of a single good answer. I'm like, "Oh, geez." There's drugs. There's not legalization. Legalization or drug, hold on. I was like, "Yeah, go for it." You're doing the Joe Rogan thing. You're pushing back because I brought up weed. Go ahead. I'm sorry. I have become meme. I don't want to interrupt your call. No, you're good. Because there's memes upon memes upon memes I can go with here. But no, because people bring up, okay, there's no issues that the government is not representing of the public.

What People Want (02:10:39)

Here's the issue. Somebody will bring up, well, what about the legalization of drugs? The first issue people have is, one, they look at national polling. Very few things are decided on a national level. That's the first huge mistake. Arguably, a lot of BLM made mistakes in this arena where they're saying, "Why isn't the government doing anything about policing? Federal government can't do anything about policing." Sometimes they're your state government. Sometimes you're local city government. The people that elect your chief of police, your police commissioner, that's coming from your mayor. You've got people looking, one, at the wrong parts of the government even figure out the solution to the problem. Two, oftentimes for polling, the questions are vague enough that you can poll very high. But when you get into the weeds on things, no pun intended, you start to realize, "Oh, shoot, this is more complicated than I thought." I don't know the numbers in particular for legalization of marijuana, but this is what I'm going to guess is the case. If you poll and you say, "Should we legalize marijuana?" That number might poll at like 65, 70 percent. But that's including people that are in favor of medical marijuana. If you were to poll, should we decriminalize recreational use of marijuana? That number might drop to like 52 percent. And then if you poll should we completely legalize, not just decriminalize, but completely legalize recreationalism or whatever on it, that never might drop to like 40 percent. There's like all these different ways you can poll around issues where people are like, "Oh no, we broadly agree on this topic. When you really figure out, well, do you, do we really agree? Or is it just like broad consensus around a thing that's never going to show up like in a piece of legislation?" A really good example, one example I do know is socialized healthcare. I think if you poll, there was a time a few years ago where if you poll America, do you think every American citizen should have access to like free healthcare? I think that answered that poll at like 74 percent, yes. But when you asked, "Should the government be the sole provider of healthcare?" It dropped to like 26 percent. It dropped 50 points. And you could see, it was both asking questions about single payer, but the way that it was asked was so different. That even if you all, it looks like there's consensus, there's not nearly as much consensus as people think around certain ideas. Yeah, go. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. That polls, the way you ask the polls really matters, when you ask, "Should the government be in charge of a thing?" That also biases the answer. Because there's such a negative experience with government creating a .gov site that runs the thing. But sometimes, I think if you dig in, if you have a one-hour conversation with each individual citizen, I think you will understand that yes, there is support for socialized medicine. It's not-- The argument has to be made though. What do you mean? The argument has to be made? Like if you just ask a conservative, like, "What about single payer?" They're going to tell you no. You might be able to build up to an argument for it, but you're going to have to make the case for it. No, but I thought we were talking about the feeling deep inside your mind and heart. Does the government represent that? Oh. So it's not like some shallow surface layer public opinion.

Does the government effectively represent what the people want? Not a shallow survey, but deeply what they want. I'm not actually that familiar with the debates over health care, but let's maybe look at an easier one. Maybe you'll say it's harder. War. War is a really good example where the government was very responsive, I think, to the people. You think so? So Iraq, Afghanistan, the government didn't manipulate public opinion. There is an argument to be made that they did in terms of WMD and everything, but after 9/11-- were you in the United States after 9/11? After 9/11. It seems accusatory. Like, where were you in 9/11? He's checking, okay. All right, cool. I have evidence and witnesses. No, okay. I'm very defensive right now. It's very strange. Look into it. I think after 9/11, we could have gone to country. We could have gone to war with any country in the world. We were ready because all of America was like, "Oh my God." And they pointed to Iraq. The reasons for the WMDs was kind of dumb, but I don't think we even needed WMDs to go to Iraq. We could have just said, I'm saying was giving medical aid to Taliban, Al Qaeda, Iraq, let's go, and we would have gone for it. But post-Iraq, Iraq was for a while popular and then became obviously deeply unpopular Iraq and Afghanistan. And I think you could see that influence other foreign policy that the United States had. For instance, we opted more towards drone warfare than troops on the ground for places like Yemen. We opted more towards sending money and help instead of boots on the ground for places like Syria. And I think that a lot of that was in response to how unpopular the Iraq stuff had become. And when you looked at a lot of elections afterwards, even for Obama, one of the defining characteristics of a lot of campaigns where I'm going to close Guantanamo Bay, I'm going to get us out of foreign wars, even up to Trump. I'm not going to stop doing all this weird stuff in the Middle East. But they didn't still withdraw from Afghanistan. They didn't withdraw, but they definitely tapered off and weren't as aggressively pushing those types of conflicts because they knew it was unpopular. But I think if you also consider perfect information or good information, if you ask a lot of people, are you okay spending this amount of money for this purpose, so military conflict in Iraq and Afghanistan? I think almost from the very beginning, they would say no. After 9/11, I feel like maybe like a few days after 9/11. I remember freedom of eyes. We were so mad at it. Well, there's some memes and so on, yes. But the nature of the public support for the war, was there public support in 2003, which is when the invasion happened? I feel like initially there was a lot I remember seeing it on, but then I also looked in a Republican household and I was not very like media savvy of that. I was on my own. I don't know if the nature of that public support had to do with WMDs or with 9/11. Because the weird- We came about WMDs. But I wonder what is the nature of the world to poll people and let's say hypothetically, there was above 50% support for the war. What would be the nature of that support? And to what degrees the government actually representing the will of the people versus some complex mechanism, like the military industrial complex, is manipulating the narrative that's controlling public opinion. And then there's the media that gets a lot of attention by being divided and how they're shaping the narrative through the mechanism of division. There's a lot of complicated things happening. Yes. It's not just like the people and then the government. For sure, I agree that there are going to be different elements at play.

Political Divides And Institutions

The Influence of Different Institutions (02:17:05)

And how much of those elements that lead us astray can be attributed to the largeness of the different systems and the different institutions, like the media institutions and government. The institutions that have a monopoly on violence, let's put it this way, which is what along the way to define government. Sure. It's complicated. There's definitely going to be different institutions at play. But I think that all I would say is in reverence to my original point, when there becomes like broad consensus around a thing, I think the government will usually follow. It's not going to fight. It's going to follow more often than not. But I think that a lot of times I think Americans think that there's more consensus around certain issues than there actually are. So like a really good example, we're on that war point too. What caused like the lowest dip in Biden's approval rating? I'm pretty sure it was right after we pulled out of Afghanistan, which I think if I would have asked people like a year before, like let's assume that we could pull out of Afghanistan. The government's probably going to collapse after we leave because they just don't have the will to fight, they don't have the support, they don't have whatever, it's just not going to work. But like no Americans are going to die. It might be a couple of people go, but like no Americans are going to die, we're going to go Afghanistan. Would you support that? I think broadly speaking, I think like more than 60 or 70 percent of Americans are like, yeah, that would be fine. But then when it actually plays on TV, when we see the people hanging onto the planes, when we see like helicopter embassies, some of the courts and politicians, well now it's like, oh my god, this was horrible and it was so botched. And it was so like it could have gone so much better. It's like, well could it have gone better? Like maybe, maybe not, but I mean it seems like you can have consensus around it's an opinion, but the way that things play out and the way that people actually feel, it's actually way, way, way more complicated. And there's not usually this broad consensus opinion. I'd like to believe that. I mean, just to lay my cars on the table, I have faith in the power of effective government. I just have a lot of concern about what happens as institutions grow in size. For sure. And I just have a lot of worry about the natural corrupting influence on the individuals and on the system as a whole, like the boys club nature of it. I don't know, there must be a better term. But basically they agree to the game and they play the game and there's a generational aspect, momentum to the game. And they more and more stop being responsive to the people that they represent. I just feel like there is that mechanism. And I think the nice thing, democracy, elections are resistance to that natural human mechanism. Also the balance is a power is a resistance to that mechanism. In some ways, the media that reveals the bullshit of politicians is also a resistance to that mechanism. It's hard to be full of shit as a politician, because people will try to catch you on it. So there's an honesty method there that keeps you honest. It's to some degree. But it still feels like it still feels like politicians are going to politician. Yeah, they definitely play their games. That is true. There's probably always going to be that meta narrative over like governance that just develops as like you have to form relationships and play games to legate legislation past and everything. The only reason why I don't like it when people attack institutions is because one, institutions are incredibly important, arguably paramount. No, they are to keeping society running. And two, I think sometimes when we shift the blame onto institutions too much, I think that we lose sight of what the real problems are. So for instance, in the United States today, people might be very critical of the government not getting much done. But then everybody turns their eyes to the government for being ineffective. But what I would argue is I would say the government is actually incredibly effective, and it's showcasing the will of the American people really well right now, which is we are historically more divided than we have ever been. And if I were to just look at the people, and I would say we have a historic divide that is getting like rapidly blown apart by things like the internet and the media, right? If that exists, well, what would I expect that government to look like? I wouldn't expect that government to be governing very effective. I would expect that government to show that legitimate divide in people. Do you think that divide, we have a perception of a large divide between left and right? Do you think that's a real divide that's in this country?

Political divide in America (02:21:21)

Narrow the language. What do you mean by real divide? Do you think there is that divide in ideology that there's a large number of people that believe a certain set of policies and other different set of policies? I think it's like the perception of the on Twitter. No, I think there is a large divide in terms of belief. I don't think there's very much divide between any people in terms of like what they like on the most fundamental levels want in terms of human beings. But in terms of like Democrat versus Republican right now, I think there is a huge divide in terms of the direction they want to see the country go, and what they believe really and what they even believe is reality, right? Unfortunately, that's what we've gotten to. Can I just speak about the mechanism of the left and right here, maybe on the memetic rivalry aspect? Is there some aspect to the left on which you're a part of that attacks their own for ideological impurity more than the right does? Is it the bigotry of small differences? There's a concept where when you're near somebody who is very slightly different than you, you want to destroy it, but when you're with somebody that's way different than you, you don't. I think the left does it, but I think the right does it too. I didn't realize until I started dipping more into conservative communities, but oh my god, the people from the daily wire and the people from Turning Point and the America First, but all these different groups of people hate each other and they fight each other so much. They hire and fire sometimes employees. They smack about each other. I think there's a lot of political division between both sides. I think that the left just gets highlighted more because it's like the internet and a lot of the internet spaces have a lot of left-leaning people. You see the crazy communists and the crazy progressives and the crazy center-left liberals and the crazy blah, blah, blah. Whereas a lot of the right-leaning people have been pushed off of the main areas of the internet now. Interesting. My sense was that it's hard to exist on the center left, but maybe because I just don't have the full spectrum view of the political divide. It felt like central left is a difficult position to occupy. Yeah, I would definitely say so. I don't know if it's that difficult to be center-right. It's very difficult to be center-right. I think actually maybe even more difficult because a center-right person might be somebody who's conservative but not a fan of Trump and you're like over. Look at Liz Cheney. You've had politicians that are just like they didn't back the Trump stuff and now they're gone. Or you might be like center-right, but you don't think the election was stolen and now you're half the Republican party is looking at you like you're crazy. That's true. I think there's a Ben Shapiro I'm talking with. I think he publicly spoke against Trump. He did initially, but I felt like he softened his language up on him pretty significantly. So there's a significant pressure to kind of couch out to a certain kind of messaging. Which the whole Republican party is feeling right now. Geez, that two years from now, that election is going to be insane. It's just hard. Okay, so to generalize, it's hard to be in the center. It feels like for sure. This center and then like do like a random walk among the policies around that. I don't know what that mechanism is. I mean, it makes people like me not feel good being in the center. It seems like people are just not nice to people in the center. Like the public, the Twitter machine is not nice to the people who are open-minded in the center. Is that- there's some truth to that. Two reasons for that. One is because I think a lot of people that market themselves as center are legitimately spineless cowards and deserve to be called out. I've never killed a man, but today might be my first. I'll take over. Like I told you, I'll take over your stream with the AI. Is that guy going to be streaming in the background? Hey, fellas. Okay, gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Lots of gotchas. Okay, gotcha. Okay, gotcha. And decrease them, which already is a pretty low level of emotion. Just decrease it completely. When people are screaming at you and accusing stuff, just remain calm. Absolutely. Emotionless. The gas lighter strategy. Okay, so what we're talking about. So I don't- I don't even- I don't ever identify a center anything because it's got such a bad reputation because some of that I stand center with a spine. It's called being open-minded and it's not center left and right. Those are just labels. Here's a really good quote my mom said to me when I was really young. She said, "Stevey, don't ever let your mind be so open that your brain falls out." And that's what I find that a lot of center people do. It's not what she told me last night. Sorry. Why are you like this? I'm sorry. Okay, I'm glad I can- I'm glad I can bring that. I'm glad you feel like this is a safe space. Like I said, people are- It's not judgmental. If you want to talk about fucking my mom, you know what, you're totally within your rights. I didn't say that guy. You said that. I didn't say that. I didn't say that. I support that. She's a beautiful woman. Her husband probably wouldn't be too happy about it, but you know. I didn't say those any sexual relations. It was just that having a conversation with her. You projected that. That says more by you than me. Anyway, go ahead about Spinalis Center.

Trap of anti-establishment (02:26:02)

There is some aspect to that, which is like amorphous. To me, center means you think freely about each individual policy without being stuck to a case. Some ideal- Yeah, but a lot of people don't do that. They'll call them so centrist, but then they're just- they're anti-establishment, essentially, on everything. I don't know your position on vaccines or anything. I met a lot of free and open thinkers who were like, "You know what? I'm open to everything and it's an experimental vaccine. I'm going to eat hydroxychloroquine and Ivermectin because that's what the institutions are telling me not to take. I think Fauci got too much money from that company and these are, but I'm an open thinker. I'm an MIT. What do you think about position of vaccines is exactly?

Demetri's position on vaccines (02:26:42)

I hear a lot of crazy things from a lot of people. You might be from MIT, but I know you're from the internet. People from the internet are weird and crazy. Who knows? I don't like arrogance and I have criticized scientists during COVID. A lot of people, but scientists included, having arrogance. Which is fair. I think there's a lot of good criticism to be made of different scientific and medical establishments over a lot of stuff, but nobody can make those good criticisms because they're too obsessed over just trying to have the anti-establishment answer. That is what is upsetting me the most. I think there are good conversations to be had about a lot of stuff related to how we handled the coronavirus. We're locked down as effective. Was there enough data to support the huge measures we took? Why didn't we have the option to show? I was infected a month ago. Why do I need to be vaccinated? Why wasn't that option everything in the United States? I don't think it was. There are really good questions to be asked there, but all the people asking the questions are also trying to tell you that Ivermectin and monoclonal antibodies are the way to go for everything and the vaccine is evil and they're just going to turn you gay like the frogs. It's like Jesus. There's no place to reasonably criticize from because all of the people that are criticizing aren't doing it with an open mind or they're not reading studies or doing anything. They're saying, "I do my own research," which means they listen to whatever the last guy on Joe Rogan said and now they are parroting that opinion 100%. The last guy on Joe Rogan, not Joe Rogan. That Robert Malone guy on Joe Rogan got me real far. That's one guess. People see him as the father of mRNA technology. He published one paper. What do you mean people? Which people think that? Joe Rogan fans, I run into these people. I start arguing with people and they start sending me, "What about you?" I'm a Joe Rogan fan and I appreciate the vaccine. That's good. I'm glad you do. But there's definitely like a... Sorry, but you said there's a type... What's the type of Joe Rogan fan? Anti-establishment. I think that's not Joe Rogan. That's a general public discourse. There's a default anti-establishment on the right and the left. That's the default easy thing to go to. I think Joe Rogan fans are definitely a certain type of anti-establishment though. I could guess the Joe Rogan fan. If I would have to do general population versus Joe Rogan fan, who do you think is more likely to be anti-vaccine? Do you have data on this? Are you just guessing? Just guessing. I think you are actually judging. I am. I think you're judging. Because I think you're also... The beautiful thing about podcasting, this could be similar to streaming. There's a large number of people that just listen. What does it mean to be a Joe Rogan fan? I don't think you just listen. I think people listen and absorb the information. I would say that Joe Rogan fan base is as divided in the vaccine as the general public. Gotcha. Man, I'm gonna look for polling data on that. I'm sure somebody's got to have done it out there. But... No, but you're basically revealing the fact they have no data. You're using your own judgment. For sure. Based on how he's had conversations about his experience with the coronavirus and then based on the guests that have come on that have talked and echoed a lot of anti-vax talking points and been completely unchallenged. And then based on statements he's made about myocarditis and the vaccine and everything as well. So it's the level of challenge or not that he's doing? Well, yeah. And then what his true positions are. And then the types of guests he typically chooses to bring on to talk about the vaccines. But that represents somehow a deep anti-establishment feeling versus just a vaccine. I mean, I've seen the vaccine and other things being... I think that broke people. I think all the coronavirus, that whole one or two years broke. A lot of people. Because there's a lot of emotion and emotion quickly solidified into an opinion that almost had nothing to do with thinking through and updating your knowledge and so on. You just made up your mind. Yeah, but I think a lot of it comes from that anti-establishment place. The vaccine represents the ultimate of establishment. It was a huge private company backed by a huge public government. And there's Fauci and there's Biden and there's Pfizer and there's all these countries locking us up in our homes, telling us to do a thing. The vaccine was the ultimate submission tool to show you that the government owns you. Not only have you got injected once, it's a series. And then you got to get boosters and it's like they're trying to keep you under their thumb. And that's the control. I feel like that vaccine became like the ultimate rallying cry between like, do you support, are you a sellout that is going to believe whatever the government tells the sheep to take? Or are you going to be like the guy that stands against the crowd and gets fired from his job and pulls his kids from school because they're not going to let the evil Fauci medicine jab them in the arm? And the funny thing is the crowd that stands against the institution is not larger than the crowd of sheep.

How do we defend institutions? (02:31:09)

There's like one sheep standing there. Sure. Yeah. Or it feels that way sometimes. One vaccine sheep. Well, okay. What's the defensive institutions? How do you regain the trust of institutions? Like, first of all, do you think that there's ways in which WHO CDC failed? And do you think there's criticism towards Pfizer and the big pharma companies that's deserved? Damn, the pharma companies, I'm not sure. For CDC and WHO, so here's a criticism that I have of all of academia and I feel it's stronger, stronger every day. I don't think it's enough to be a researcher or to be correct about issues. Academia needs to increase its ability to communicate. It is just an unbelievable, unmitigated failure that academics are unwilling to wade into the complicated topics that exist today because other people are, you know. First, you call me spineless and then you call me a bad communicator. But no, look, you're here. You're doing it. So you get props for me. Okay. Good job. That mother. But there are like so many, but I'm sure you've, I'm sure that you must have heard another fellow academic, a fellow colleague, expressed some amount of frustration about, like in their specific discipline, they know something to be true and they know that like, a lot of the messaging is like wrong or bad and the public about it, but they're never going to step out and say anything because either one, they're very measured and careful with their take, which they feel is incompatible with what people want to hear, or two, they're really worried that they might be incorrect. So they're going to be cautious while everybody else is going out in like hardcore. And they also don't have the support of institutions for them to go out on an olim. Yeah, that too. So like to take risks. For example, I've heard that with lab leak theory. I've had a lot of biologists, virologist friends that are like, yeah, it's obviously leaked from a lab early on. Oh, maybe. Okay. We can fight over this one. But sorry. Let's go. We can fight over this. Well, like they, okay, I should sort of backstep and say like, that's like you talk about shooting a shit, you haven't really investigated, but it's your gut. Like this doesn't make any sense. They would never say that publicly, of course, mostly because you're saying like, what they would all say is like, we want to see data. Yeah, which would be good, which is fine. So they're going with like, like, this is too many coincidence in the same place. That's the logic, but they don't want to say anything because there's no data. You need to have evidence. You need to have actual evidence to say one way or the other. There's that. But there's also just like you said, I mean, effective, effective communication.

Gotcha (02:33:39)

You're a fan of Sean Carroll. Oh, yes. He's like one of the only people in this whole planet that I like besides you. I love Sean Carroll. Anytime Sean Carroll is brought up as evidenced, there's a smile that comes over your face of like joy of like a little kid thinking about Santa Claus. Okay, I love Sean Carroll too. I love Sean Carroll because I hate this divide between like, you're either STEM or you're like philosophy arts and all that other stuff. And the two worlds kind of across. And I love that it was so good at physics, but like explores and pays attention to all of the like sociological stuff too. It's so rare to find that quality in a person. He's legit one of the really, really, really specialized, but you don't have to be a Sean Carroll. You can be just a little better at educating another person in the, in the medical in the health space is somebody named Andrew Huberman, a friend of mine from Stanford. He's an incredible educator. There's the kind of process and science that you should call like review or survey papers where you basically summarize all that's going on, integrate it and like draw wisdom from it and also project like, where is the discipline headed? And Andrew does that basically on all these sub components of the different stuff going on and in neuroscience and biology and your biology, all that. He's able to, he does a podcast called Human Lab where he just summarizes on and is able to explain like, what does that actually mean for your, for your life in terms of protocols of how to make your life better? I feel like people should be able to do that more and more. But with viral virology and boy, that's a tricky one. That's a really tricky one. I wish that people could have honest conversations. Like I attack a lot of people that do the lab leak theory stuff, but truly, we should be able to have that conversation publicly. It just always because like the people that are having the conversation don't ever really want to have the conversation, they're not being honest. Like, I'm a guy that like does his own research and it's so boring reading studies and a lot of it, I can only do abstracts and like, it's so much work, but I'll never ever say that about myself. I'm a guy that does his own research because every time I hear somebody say that, they don't do any research. When they say they do their own research where they mean as they've seen one podcast and their opinion on this podcast is that definitely not mine because it was mine. I wouldn't be criticizing anything they say. But yeah, so like lab leak is another one where it's like, well, how do you know it's lab leak? How do I know it's lab leak? Because Fauci lied and Hunter Biden, lab, and it's like, okay, come on, you haven't engaged with it at all. There's really interesting research that shows this a really strong study that shows that there's like a high degree of certainty that it came from the wet markets. Very, very high degree of certainty. And there was an article that came out recently where it's like Senate concludes that virus actually came from the Wuhan virology lab or whatever. And that whole article, if you actually read it, it never says that in the article. I don't know why they tweeted it, but that headline. But yeah, to back up, I'm sorry. I think we should have good. You should be sorry. Yeah, I'm not sorry, actually. I get to ramble here. Okay, I'm here for a long time. I rescind my apology. Okay, I actually rescind my apology. We should be able to have challenging conversations about things. But you gotta man, be well right on both sides. Not not this like I do my own research. So I don't believe anything that Fauci says like, come on, dude, do you think you can do better than that? Not you personally, but got you. How does that feel? So if people who don't know, that's the catchphrase. Got you through all tragedy and triumph, through all the rollercoaster of life, your response to it is got you. Yeah. It's election. Let me jump to that before I continue to with political discourse. Psychologically, you are in a lot of heated debates, and you're usually super calm under fire until you're not. Sometimes you lose your temper completely very rarely. But that's like your opinion, man. Let me ask about your psychology. What are psychologically your strengths and weaknesses that you're self aware about? I think I'm very non judgmental. So I can entertain a lot of different thoughts without agreeing with them or condoning them. I think that's a really big benefit to me. For whatever reason, I seem to be like pretty calm and dealing with annoying people. It's why I got promoted at the casino so fast. I could deal with like drunks or whatever. Like it just didn't affect me that much. What percent of the population is annoying? Depends on how you're engaging with them. Most people aren't really annoying ever. That's what I mean. But if you're doing like political debate, what percentage is annoying? I guess it depends on who I'm debating and what the topic is. I guess I'm trying to point out the fact that sometimes you can say that reveals something about you if you think a large percent of people are annoying. Well, I would say working graveyard shift when alcohol is involved, that percentage of people goes very, very, very high. Or to be more fair, actually. It's not a high percentage truly. But if you're a server, one bad customer can ruin the rest of your shift. So you only need like one or two people acting in that manner to just like totally throw you off. And you're able to at least these days not allow that one customer to throw you off. Yeah. Very much like I noticed especially after having a son, there's something about like six year old kids or whatever where it's like, if they get mad, they're never going to be mad for that long. Like they'll move on. Like that's my mentality. I'm like a six year old kid. Like I might be mad about something about I'll get over it like 30 minutes or an hour. Like, yeah, I'm pretty good about not caring that through it. It's very rare that I'll like hold a grudge against anybody or like be angry about something or really disaffected by something over the long term. That almost never happens to me. What are your weaknesses psychologically? I just say, I still have a problem with projecting. I think we all probably do, but like my mind onto others, it's like if I understand this and I've said this, you should understand it. And if you're not, you're dumb. That's like an issue that I still have that where I project too much. What about like holding grudges and stuff like that? I never hold grudges. I'm like the least grudgy person ever. It's kind of a meme on my community because anybody can always like come back as long as they're acting different. What about that? As long as they're acting different. As long as they're acting different. All right. The reason why I say that is because so friends, nobody likes this better. I have a strong stance on apologies and then I hate them. I don't ever want to hear an apology. I don't care about them ever. They don't mean anything to me. If you did something bad as long as you've fixed the behavior and you're not doing that thing, then we're generally chill. There's been a lot of people that have been involved in weird stuff with me, but then they go off, they do the thing and they come back and it's like, "Okay, cool." As long as you don't do it again, we're fine. It's all good. I'm sorry. I feel that way. It's not your fault, Steven. It's not your fault. Okay. Gotcha. You've said plenty of negative stuff, positive stuff, negative stuff about Hassan. Yeah. This is my podcast. I get to get you to force you to say positive things. What do you love? I'm all about love. Let's go back to girl on me on the R-word stuff. You're going to make me compliment Hassan. This is going to be a harder conversation than that. All right. We're going to get you to feel emotions.

The Hasan Piker Discussion

Hasan part I (02:40:19)

Okay. For people who don't know, he's another popular political streamer. I think you had, as the kids call it, a bridge burning over Bernie Sanders. I don't know. My research is very limited on this. But what do you respect and love most about Hassan? He puts in a lot of work when he was growing his stream from 2000 to 15,000. He was streaming 12 hours a day every single day. That was Adam. I did a lot of work. He does seem to be pretty good at networking and socializing and making the correct friends and connections to continue to build his business. What about him as a political thinker? I know you don't think I live him on that regard. Really? I think that's unfair. I honestly want to push back on that because... I have zero respect for him as a political thinker. There's not going to be almost anything. Oh, I will say, I admire the fact that through no actual capability or ability of his own, he manages to wind up at some of the correct answers just because he's towing the line. That is good job for him on that. He's got a lot of correct opinions. He has no idea why. I think that's undeserved. I think that's too harsh, man. The reason I bring that up is I feel like there is a deep grudge in there somehow. You're the father now, since you're so old, the grandfather of the political debate on stream, unless stream political debate. There could be some grudge about that split that happened or not enough credit given, all that kind of stuff. I just think he's somebody that has a left-leaning ideology that's different than yours. He was a Bernie supporter. I guess you were not. Can you explain to me where the division is? He exemplifies everything that I absolutely hate about politics, which is shallow engagement, heavily ideologically driven. You're not ideologically different. Absolutely not. That's what we're talking about, like the free thinker in the real meaning of that word. Let me qualify. Let me qualify what I mean when I say that. I spend a lot of time, unfortunate time, delving into the boring world of philosophy. I spend a lot of time thinking about what are my ethical positions? How do I feel about myself, the people around me, and how that relates to the world around me? From all of these positions, I think you might have used the phrase "first principles" earlier. From these first principles, out of that is where all of my political positions are built out of. Full stop. If you ask me a question, like, how do you feel about the right to own a firearm, or how do you feel about social health care? We can walk through, "Well, this is how I feel about it." It's like a thing from the government. This is where the government gets its power. This is ethically how groups of people are supposed to function. This is morally how we relate to each other. Personally, this is how I feel like I'll be able to do every single political belief back there. It's not like I'm telling you, like, if I were to ask Hassan, what do you feel about this political topic, he's going to tell me what progressives are supposed to say. I don't know what he thinks about it. I don't know what he thinks about it. Don't you think that's a cynical take? Why is he just because his views coincide with the mainstream narrative, mainstream viewpoints of progressive thinkers? Why does that mean he's not thinking? Because his engagement with every subject is incredibly shallow, 100% predictable. I could probably program a script to give you every single potential answer you could have to any single question you could give him. Again, I think that's a pretty cynical take. Okay, it could be the case that his brain perfectly aligns with every single man's story. No, but I don't know if you know it as perfectly aligns, because I think you're just taking a very select, just like streamers do with each other, a very select slice that represents the perfect alignment as opposed to looking at a person struggling with ideas and thinking through ideas and then giving him a pass, like a lot of people, like I give you a pass on just the fact that you say a lot of crazy shit on stream for drama, which is why don't say things for drama. It might be dramatic, but you've evolved as a fish evolves legs. You've evolved a mechanism boat which creates controversy.

Hasan part II (02:44:05)

Sure. You could say it's not intention, but it happens. Okay, sure. The extreme is kind of learn that kind of thing. And so I'm sure Hassan does the same kind of stuff. And so like underneath it, there's still thinking being that's contending with political ideas. You don't think so. That's a really good job at hiding it. There are other political figures that I really don't like that I wouldn't say the same thing about. So like, I don't know if you have Voschrit in there. Like, okay, it's that's a person that Vosch. He also split out of my community and grew to something and now he hates me and he's an anti fan community and they all hate it. Tell me something you love above. I can tell you a lot of things about Vosch. I think Vosch legitimately thinks through a lot of his political positions. I admire or did admire that he has like his own like position, so he would take someone's country to people further left than him. He's got some positions that don't fit his ideology kind of at all. Like he's his own intimate thinker. Rhetorically, he's very effective. He was willing to sit down and do research for like his debates and everything. He would spend a lot of time practicing like his rhetorical effectiveness and navigating conversations. He intentionally and purposefully built like a community that exemplified his values. Yeah, I've got a lot. I don't we are completely split and hate each other now. But like I have a lot of why why why first of all hate is a strong what why the hate? Okay, I don't hate him, but he hates me because we had a couple of really big debates. What happened? Well, one had to do with whether or not you should live your values. And can you give me the story that's a charitable interpretation? I always give charitable interpretation. You don't. I absolutely do. You don't. Wait, name one time it happened. Five minutes ago, you talking about Hassan. Everything else about Hassan is true. There is no steel man there. Okay. That's not charitable. I'm sorry. If you can if you can prove me wrong, I would love you to do it. Okay. I'm using my gut instinct. Usually when somebody feels strongly about another person in that way, it's not coming from a place of data and reason. It's coming from a place of emotion. It's coming from a place of resentment and garage and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, I got to understand. There's emotions deep in there. So the got you is hiding the got you is a surface of an iceberg and there's a deep ocean underneath it. You yourself have not explored. I disagree, but I understand my love is actually a doorway. The young lav is a door for you to explore the depths of that ocean to find my fish, my pre-vault form. Yeah. I understand why you think the way you do and you should. You shouldn't believe me. And I understand that because if somebody told me the same thing, I'd think you probably just really don't like this person for a reason or two. I understand what you think that way. Okay. The reality is though, for any political person that I disagree with, like I can give them a fair shake. It's one of the few things I think I do exceedingly well on my stream. Even with Hassan, there's been drama that he's been involved in and I've like very when I'm involved in drama, he'll always throw me out of the bus. But when he's involved in stuff, always like, oh, like I think Hassan was right here or I think that he meant this. There was a there was a thing that came up once, Brian, livestream fail, he was getting roasted because he referred to somebody. He used expression shit skin to refer to somebody's like the way they looked. And I have only ever heard that in the context of four-chan people talking about like Indians or like black people. Like it's a racial thing. But I could tell the context and everything that he was saying, he was insulting some guy. I think it was kind of like in cell virgin or whatever. He was going for like acne skin. I think that's what he met when he said it. And there were a whole bunch of people that were insulting, like, oh my god, did he just say racist term? And I was like, no, I don't think he was racist. I think he was like, he was just reaching for words and that's what came out. So like that's an example of me being chair. But okay, but didn't you criticize him for something? I was trying to like Google, why the hell you guys split out? Because I thought your friends, you should be like, instead of a work Kamala Harris video about go ahead.

Starts the conversation about Hasan Piker. (02:47:47)

Is that what is that? So so did you, I feel like you criticized them over something. And I am okay, this is very vague memory, but you criticized them over something. And I felt that criticism wasn't charitable. Was it Pete Buttigieg stuff? Yeah, Pete Buttigieg. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. So I said this a million times, but there's no amount of context or no amount of nuances is ever acceptable people. I don't think Hassan is homophobic, but I think the comments made about Pete. Booty judge were really homophobic. That's what he said. Yeah. And there were a lot of people making a lot of comments that made me really uncomfortable about Pete Buttigieg that was insane to me. Spurred by the comments of Hassan? No, but it was an environment of progressives, all the progressives were attacking Pete. And I felt like his gayness became like the subject. You have a white, white throw Hassan under the bus for that. He was jumping along with all of those types of like insults. You don't think you've done the same kind of stuff? If I do, call me out of it and I'll try with you. That's what the R word was about. That's a good call out. No, but like your friend, like you should privately tell him, right? Like, hey, well, no, by then we were sworn enemies. So that wasn't the reason. No, no, no. It was over a Kamala Harris video. Sworn enemies. He hates me. What am I? Listen, for all of these people, I will accept them back into my life if they ever want to come back in at any point in time. But usually they're the ones that they correct themselves, right? No, not. I'm not expecting anybody to hear. So here's a deal with Vash and Hassan. These are like the three, we're the three guys online. None of us will talk to each other. Hassan, because he won't give clout to anybody and Vash because he thinks I'm bad faith. And then neither of them will talk to me because they both hate me. You guys should go look on a camping trip together. It's like broke back, modern, but three way and just like rejoin, refine, refine the function for each other. Honestly, just from the internet perspective, for me as a just stepping into this world, there's some aspect to which you have a responsibility.

Callow says Joe, Hasan, and Vaush should team up. (02:49:31)

You have an opportunity. I wish you guys would kind of be the beacon of like, forgiveness and friendship and like camaraderie and that kind of stuff. Yeah, I agree. And even if we disagree, it would be really good content. Yeah, shit talk like friends, shit talk. Sure. Versus not like the fact that you guys don't talk to each other. Like I would love for you to shit talk publicly. With the camaraderie, I was there. Like there's love in the beginning, love in the end, but you beat the shit out of each other in the middle. And that's what last stream is for the political discourse. That's great political discourse. Versus, I think what underlines it is some jealousy and so on with this, you get this many I just want to make sure you're clear to your audience. I'm sure you have flaws that I'm just not in this dynamic. Hard to find, you know, because I'm your only flaws. You're too modest.

The beef with Hasanabi (02:50:32)

Yeah. So why did you guys split up? Because I would love it honestly. Just let me just put that idea out there for you guys to make up and. Yeah, it's out there. Of course, as everybody talks, Mi Vash Anasana, it's crazy that like the three largest like political debate left, leading people online, like can't do any type of content or collaboration at all. It's so stupid. What was the reason you guys split up the common Harris? So Hassan's entry into kind of like the Twitch political debate world was in I think 2018, I think he did the debate with Charlie Kirk and he reached out to me to kind of like review that debate to like go on to go over it on stream and he came on, we went over it and then we kind of friendship developed. We hung out in real life. I think when I came to LA, I think I slept on a couch, we played with his dog. We were like kind of friends. And as time went on and then he was a little bit more, he was farther left than he let on. So like I was a social Democrat, he was a social Democrat, but back in those days, like 2018, when people said they were a social Democrat, they really met socialists, but they just didn't want to say it. So he was farther left than me and we had a lot of deep divides in our approach to politics. Whereas like I was very much like a first principles, this is my whole political position. And he was very much kind of like a, this is like the political ideology I'm involved in. And this is kind of like the field that I kind of like navigate in. So there were a couple instances where these divides would be laid very bare. One was when I it was either him or the young Turks. I think it was him. There was a shooting in a neighborhood where very young black child gets killed by a white shooter. And they did a video about like hate crimes and how hate crimes are on the rise between races and white people are evil and blah, blah, blah, not that, but like white people, white people, many hate crimes against black people. And I remember saying to him, I was like, Hey, we don't have all the data yet for this feels really bad to make videos about this beforehand. Because it's the same type of shit that happens at airports. You know, is there a thing going on? Was it a brown person? Are they Muslim? It's Islamic extremism. We see this played out so many times in recent history, probably not a good idea to jump to conclusions. And he's like, Well, no, you don't understand, like it's not that big a deal, whatever. And obviously, as the story goes, tale as old as time, the data comes out. It was just an errant shot. There was like gang violence, shot goes out of nowhere, hits a kid in the car. It wasn't like a hate crime. The guy was trying to kill a kid. But yeah, we basically we bump up against a few kind of political disagreements like this. And an annoying thing is happening in my community where Hassan is like the serious political figure because he's from the young Turks. And I'm just kind of like, I do politics, but I also game. And anytime I criticize Hassan, people like Destiny, you need to be more respectful. He does this full time. If you're going to bring criticisms, you need to be like really well read and researched because he's got a, you know, more serious, whatever, which I thought was ridiculous. So by the way, people don't know he worked at the young Turks, which is like the largest left-leaning YouTube channel probably, or you said the time, yeah. So finally, he did a video on Skip ahead to some more minor disagreements. He does a video on Kamala Harris because of Kamala Harris. And it's like seven or eight horrible things about Kamala Harris. And I'm like, okay, I know at least one or two of these things are not fully accurate. So I'm going to do all the research. I'm going to have all the sources and we're going to have a long conversation about it so that now when I provide criticism to him, it's not going to be like this horrible, like just me saying something flippantly or whatever, it's going to be like substantial criticism. So I was on a plane ride, JFK to Orlando, whatever, flying to Sweden, visit my wife. And on the plane, I review all of the video, all the data, do all the research and I write everything. I'm like, okay, I get to my wife's dad's house and I'm at the table, we're having a conversation like, hey, we should talk about the Kamala Harris stuff. And he's like, okay, well, let's do it. And we go over it. And I'll leave to the audience to watch the video. Enough people will say this. I feel pretty confident in this. I was pretty reasonable, pretty measured, pretty calm the whole time. And I think he started to get increasingly irritated that I was levying like more, more serious criticisms at like the quality of work that he did. Probably because he felt a little bit intimidated, I think by my willingness to like dive through political stuff, there'd been a couple of awkward blobs where like on, there's like a show called the Raj Royale, where sometimes politics would come up and Hassan would kind of try to explain something. And there was another person one time in the show that made the joke, it's like, instead of Hassan taking 10 minutes to explain this contest, he just come here and explain it 30 seconds. And he like exploded it. He got so fucking mad at that. So yeah, I think that when I made that kind of call out or critique of him over the Kamal Harris stuff, he's probably feeling like increasingly irritated, threatened, agitated, and then that's kind of what began the huge split from our... So you don't think you were a dick at all? I don't think so in that conversation. Especially given that like at that point, because this is still 2018 or 2020, this might be 2019, I'm still known at that point as being very aggressive towards conservatives or all writers. Yeah, so and with lefties, is what I call them. I think I'm being like very general. Like my conversation with conservatives is like, you're so dumb. Like that's how I'm like doing. So like with him, I'm like, well, don't you think that like this is like a little bit of like an inconsistent presentation about like a feeling to be nice? But I always leave to the audience, they can go and watch that Kamal Harris video, the Kamal Harris video, Destiny of Hassan, if they think that I was being a dickhead. But a lot of people watch and said I was being pretty gentle. Well, let me say as a new fan of this space, I hope you guys make up and I hope you guys fight it out in the space of discourse and ideas. Me too. And also with the empathy, understanding what the strength of the other person is, what their buttons are. And you know, there's like an unspoken role that you don't press the buttons that you do. Unless you're doing it mutually and it's fun, because you know, you get to find a piece of each other off. So that's kind of like what friends do. You don't cross a certain line. But then other than that, you fight it out. Okay, let's step back. One other super interesting aspect of your worldview is your big supporter of Biden. Can you explain what you love about Biden? Do you love Biden more than Sean Carroll or less?

Why Theo is a MAGA defender (02:56:09)

Sean Carroll is just like in another world of admiration. I feel like I'm culturally appropriating you by saying gotcha now. But it's so convenient. It's an easy word. You decide now we're on the same wavelength. Okay, we're synchronizing. That's good. I mean, it is really interesting because even the people that support Biden usually don't say they love sort of they don't support it strongly, you know, ideologically, philosophically, the reason why I like Biden is because he's really committed to this bringing the left and right together, which is something we so desperately need in the country. And his, you know, statements over and over again of like, I'm not a the Democrat president or the Republican president. I'm the president of the United States. His desire to bring Republicans together to work on things like the infrastructure bill. That's so incredibly needed. And I have a huge amount of respect and admiration for him for trying to push through on that message. Do you think then it's unfortunate that he made that comment about MAGA? MAGA Republicans? Yeah. I mean, I figured what the comment was, but it's MAGA Republicans are not good people kind of. There, I watched the full video and he's right. There is this toxic aspect and it's hard to call out because they're always going to spend like, oh, he hates our Republicans. He's not. If you watch the quote, he's very specifically calling out like this group of people that think that the election was fraudulent. Is it clear? It is what he meant by we can bring it up. All right. This is, oh, oh, that I remember watching our stream was like, if you said it, yeah, that's bad. You can probably like YouTube MAGA Republicans Biden, but like it feels like it's pretty clear he's talking about the people that are like election denying too much of what's happening in our country today is not normal. Donald Trump and the MAGA Republicans represented extremism that threatens the very foundations of our Republic. Now, I want to be very clear. Let's hear this part. Very clear up front. Not every Republican, not even the majority Republicans are MAGA Republicans. Not every Republican embraces their extreme ideology. I know because I've been able to work with these mainstream Republicans, but there's no question that the Republican party today is dominated, driven and intimidated by Donald Trump and the MAGA Republicans. And that is a threat to this country. I disagree with that, man. He didn't clearly say extreme this ideology. He didn't say the people that dial out the validity of the election. I mean, that's Donald Trump. No, but there's that's all the candidates that Donald Trump is supporting. How many, what is it like 40, 50? How many candidates right now that are MAGA candidates are election no, but there's 80 million or whatever people voted for Donald Trump. You could say that's the MAGA Republicans. So to me, it sounded like he was referring to not even the majority. I mean, that's one nice helpful clarifying statement. But basically, there's the mainstream Republicans, and then there's those that voted for Donald Trump. That's the way I heard it. Okay. And so maybe should have done a better job at clarifying, but yeah, I feel like there's like a clear, there is a huge problem with this group of Americans that think that the election is stolen. It feels like it's what he's trying to call. No matter if that's what he meant, even flirting with that line is not a person who's bringing people together. I feel like the extending a hand to the most I've worked with Republicans in Congress, not even a majority of Republicans are like this. No, but why say not the majority of Republicans that like this say, like we're one country, we believe a sentence. So like focus on the uniting part versus saying, he does before and after that was 50 seconds.

Miscellaneous Discussions

Biden's favorite speech (02:59:56)

Okay. But that you never, the point is you never say something like that. Listen, like that, you've spoken about the Bosnia speech, which is your favorite of his. Yeah. I went back to it and listened to it. Before I moved to that, just on this, it's really hard for him to call out that group of like election and I as I think without it always feeling like why call him out, because it's arguably one of the most destructive forces that exists in this country today. Did it destroy anything? They're trying to. Did it though? It didn't. Did it. So does that mean we don't call it out? We wait until next time? No, because calling it out is giving fuel to the division. Like the people that doubted the validity of the election, that's anger, that's frustration with the other side, you heal that as opposed to saying all those people that believed that at any time are idiots. They're un-American. I mean, they don't think the election was real. I don't know if Biden has the ears of these people at all. I don't know what he can do for... There's people that believe the same thing in 2016 with the Russian hacking, right? Hold on. Yes. That is a super not fair comparison. There are definitely the mainstream Democrat opinion was that Russian intrusion in terms of social media and stuff happened, but there was never a claim that the election was stolen. No, or at least I don't know of any mainstream Democrat that supported that. Donald Trump is not just saying there was interference. Donald Trump is literally saying the election was literally stolen. That ballot boxes were hidden, that vote tallies were manipulated, that I think the claim is there's a huge gulf of difference in the two. So you can attack Donald Trump for that? Yeah. I believe it's not the words of the United to attack people that believe that. You could argue maybe it's okay, but especially not being super clear about that, about who you're referring to when you say MAGA Republicans. Because MAGA is a hat and a slogan that refers to whatever the number is, 70 million people, whoever that voted for Donald Trump. Like if all the Republicans that consider those MAGA Republicans, what percentage of them do you think believe the election was stolen? I feel like that number is, I don't have the poll, but I feel like a number is probably more than 70%. What's a MAGA Republican? Maybe I'm not... Like Trump's supporting Republican, a MAGA Republican. They're there for Trump. What's the difference between somebody that voted for Trump and a MAGA Republican and a MAGA Republican? So my mom is a MAGA Republican. If Trump ran independently and DeSantis ran under the Republican ticket, my mom would vote for Trump. She'll follow him to the end of the earth. That's like a MAGA Republican. I think it's easy to mistake that distinction in these kinds of political speeches. To me, anybody who voted for Trump can easily the context of the speech be interpreted as a MAGA Republican. Gotcha. I understand what you're saying. Maybe you could have been more clear, but I think in listening to that, I think it's pretty obvious who he's talking about. But I guess if you have an emotional response to it, I can understand the emotional response. I don't have an emotional response. I just don't like... I think I'm with what is it? Michelle Obama, they go low, we go high, meaning to me, a Uniter doesn't participate in derision. Sure. Uniter might not, but a leader has to be able to accurately assess the situation before him and make people aware of what's going on. You mean all the impeachment trials, all the censoring from social media, all of that didn't do the job? That's not his job. I don't know about censoring any of that. That mechanism, his job is to inspire a nation to unite a nation. How can he do that when half the people don't believe that he was even legitimately elected? I think he's done a good job at working on legislation and doing stuff that hopefully benefits all Americans. But I think it's important to recognize that there is a contingent of Americans that don't even believe that this is really crazy. Plenty of people that recognize that and are fighting that and are constantly screaming that from the rooftops. His job is to be the inspiring figure that makes the majority of Americans be proud for him to be a president of the nation they love. And that's what the uniting aspect is. You remind people that we are one and we love this country, we love the ideas that are represented. Sure. Does that another part of that speech? It's like a 20 minute speech, isn't it? But that's a fuck up. You just don't participate in that division.

Incumbent advantage (03:04:21)

Anyway, I understand. I just wanted to push back on the saying. Sure. One of the strengths is that he's uniting. But yes, that is an ideal. That is a goal, is a great one. And he is one that espoused that goal for a long time. Do you think, what else? So from policy perspective and so on. I thought the way he's handled Ukraine and everything thus far has been almost perfect. I think he did a really good job at the political maneuvering and bringing other countries into the fold at establishing clearly what our mission was in relation to Ukraine. I thought he did a good job there. I admire him for pulling out of Afghanistan. Even it was a little bit rough around the edges. We got out and we're gone. No American laws are lost. The domestic policies pass more major legislation than I think anybody thought possible. The green energy stuff for the last bill, the infrastructure bill, a lot of the coronavirus relief I thought was really good, especially the expansion of the child tax credit. So from a policy perspective, foreign and domestic, I think he's been successful rhetorically. I think he's generally been above board in terms of not attacking people, being too divisive. He's trying to bring people together and work on them. What do you think about the popular and the media criticism of his mental decline? Do you think he's experiencing much of that? No, he's an okay. But do you think, I mean, yeah, maybe a little bit, but he's still doing a good job. Not from a speech perspective, you mean from a policy perspective? Yeah, I'm analyzing it as a job. Yeah, from a speech perspective, maybe not the greatest. But yeah, I mean, he's definitely, what is he like, 80, 81? How old is he? I lose track after so many years. But you did say that he's probably going to run in 2024 and he's probably going to win. Did I say that? He's probably going to win? No way did I say that somewhere. He's probably going to run. Who knows who will win? But I think I feel like the incumbent advantage is so strong. You're really going to throw that away. Like, I think it's been like one or two times in history in the US, right? Where like the non-encompent, the parties put somebody else up? Yeah, I mean, the concern is like just the age and the mental decline, just the wear and tear of the campaign, all of that kind of stuff. All of the speech you have to make, the debates and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, I guess we see what happens. What? The least excited. I mean, two years from now is a long time. And his current mental state, he could run and do it. He could do a passable job. And two years, man, I don't know, I've seen videos of Bill Clinton recently. He's looking pretty rough. Biden is looking a lot more rough, worse for wearing two years than maybe they actually do have to dig out another person for running on us. What do you think about Trump when he won in 2016, I think is when you came to fruition politically speaking? So what do you think his winning the 2016 election represents? So for me, the reason why I got into politics was Trump was like this new epistemic force in American politics that like you kind of have to like flirt with facts before, even if you wanted to be nonfactual, he super didn't care. Lying was like a first language to him, just like and speaking in terms of like the way that he used language to just say to you what he felt like you needed to hear to support him and not care at all about what is going on about. Yeah, that's that's what Trump represented to me in terms of like things that I cared about. He also represents a lot more obviously that there was this undercurrent of American opinion that a lot of people didn't know still existed and it did he got elected that the over 10 window was misidentified by even a large amount of the Republican Party that populism was a lot more popular than a lot of people figured, you know, yeah, there's a lot that I guess he represented. Do you think Trump should have been banned from Twitter? Can you make the case foreign against it? So you're a big supporter of free speech. Yeah, so the case in favor of it. Do you think he should be brought back? Is Elon two? Yeah, because if he gets brought back, there's a higher chance that I'll be brought back. So I'm supporting that all the way. Thank you, Elon, unbanned my account. So because you called me week spine, I'm going to have to message Elon. Okay, at Omni Destiny, it was verified Twitter account. Omni Destiny. No, I'm just kidding. Why'd you get banned from Twitter Destiny? I don't know. I'll add that to Elon. I saw that there was a screenshot of you referring to the rape of somebody. Okay, that was on an older Twitter account and that was a bad tweet. You have multiple Twitter accounts. You're trying to go around the bans that you keep getting. Okay, hold on. You're slandering me a lot right now. Okay, let's get the facts straight. Okay, and I don't even remember why my first kind of got banned, but it was a wild account. I tweeted some widely inappropriate things. Do you regret? I don't like that word. I'm going to give the answer to most people.

Elon, unban my account! (03:09:04)

I don't regret it because I learned a lot. So I'm glad I had the bad experiences that I did. Why don't you like the word for good? I think if we look at where we are, how do you feel about determinism? I believe in hard the hardest of determinism. That's who I am. Okay, so who I am today is the culmination of everything that's occurred in the past. I believe you speaking, sorry, it's interrupt. I believe in you speaking about regret is a nice way to communicate that in this deterministic world, you've analyzed the acts of the past and you're no longer that person. Yeah, of course, for sure. That's what regret usually means. Okay, thanks for giving me the human explanation. Okay, true. So in that sense, there's a lot of things I've done that I regret. Oh, what are you? You're not human? You're a bot? NPC is my preferred. Okay, all right. Those are your components. I wish I would have been smart enough at the time to not have to have had made those mistakes. Okay, there we go. Good job. But yeah, obviously really dumb, really crazy off the wall tweets. But that account got banned, but then I made another account called, I can't believe I'm giving you a history of Twitter accounts, but another account called Omni Destiny. It's an honor. And that was my, I got verified, I was cool. They let me have that account because originally abandoned, I said appeal and I was like, oh, let me have one more. And back then Twitter was cool. And they're like, okay, go for it. And that account lasts for a long time. And I don't actually know 100% why that account got banned. I believe that the tweet that showed up in the final, I got banned for hate speech. And it was because I was, there was a picture that I tweeted with three different alt writers that are kind of like neo-Nazi people. And they were all like mixed race people. And I said like the new alt right looks like a Disney Channel original movie in terms of racial composition. And somehow they got flagged for instigating violence against minorities, I think. And I think that's a tweet that got me banned because I think that's what showed up in the final report. But I don't know. There may be other reasons because nobody ever communicates. But ever since that account went under, it's just been banivating ever since. Oh, ban evading ever since. So all my new accounts that I got banned just get banned because they finally figure out it's me and then they ban a bit. There's like one dude at Twitter HQ who's like constantly looking for my new accounts and they get me. Yeah. Anyway, yeah. So post Trump world. Do you think, okay, I mean, this? Oh, should he be banned? Oh, you asked me to make both cases. Should he be banned? I mean, damn, dude, when you're tweeting out shit that's arguably leading stuff like January 6th, I can understand why because it's like, what else is this while do you go to tweet out? Like, is he going to start instigating other violent events? So I'm sympathetic towards the like, okay, well, he can't just be here saying stuff like this. That's insane. We're going to ban him. I'm some of those. It's instigating. Yeah, you're instigating violence in the physical world. Yeah. Like if I would tweet stuff like that, I would get banned probably. On the flip side, this is the president of the United States.

Private Companies Taking Down the President (03:11:50)

It seems like he's like doing presidential decree by social media sometimes. Like, is it really right that one public or private? I should say one private company can like erase the president of the United States words from the eyes of a lot of Americans that are using these social media feeds. And one big one, which I for sure am against is the permanent ban. Yeah, I don't like that. I hate that. Even in my community, if somebody comes back over like a year, like, I mean, did you just compare yourself to the president of the United States? No, I can't myself to Twitter banning the president of the United States. Let me go to this way. If I banned Donald Trump in my chatroom, I'd abandon him in a year. A year? Yeah. What's the process for unbaning Donald Trump? What would he have to do? Usually people send me an email and they're like, listen, I did this stuff. I'm sorry, I was dumb. I'll give him another chance. But a year, what if they send an email a month later? Usually I'll abandon him. That's actually my part. I banned pretty quickly in my community, but if you ever ask me to come back. You're a big softie. Yeah, usually I'm back. Yeah. I'm very well because I used to be the worst type of internet person. And I think I'm a little bit better than I used to be. So not that you're older. Yeah. Now that I'm matured. Yeah, of course. Age bestows a wisdom that just can't be gotten any other way. What's your sense in general? Is there something interesting you could say about your view on free speech? It seems like one of those terms that's also overused to mean a lot of different things. What does it mean to you? If you have a democratic style of governance, you are entrusting people with one of the most awesome and radical of responsibilities. And that's saying that you're going to pick the people that are going to make some of the hardest decisions in all of human history. If you're going to trust people to vote correctly, you have to be able to trust and have open an honest dialogue with each other. Whether that's Nazis or KKK people or whoever talking, you have to believe that your people are going to be able to rise above and make the correct determinations when they hear these types of speeches. And if you're so worried that somebody's going to hear a certain political figure and they're going to be completely radicalized instantly, then what that tells me is that you don't have enough faith in humans for democracy to be a viable institution, which is fine. You can be anti-democratic, but I don't think you can be pro-democracy and anti-free speech within reason. So what's the within reason? I mean, you can't post a child porn or something on Twitter, people try to get you on that stuff, or direct calls to violence are probably not. You shouldn't be tweeting it like, "We're going to meet up tomorrow and go bomb, blah, blah, problem." So do you think it's okay to allow racism and anti-Semitism and hate speech? Hate speech, yes, because that can be very broadly defined. I can understand there being some basic rules of no slurs on a platform that gets into acceptable forms of moderation, or excess of harassment and bullying, I can understand. But when the moderation becomes ideological, I get a little bit nervous because there's a whole other post- reality from CPN, and nevertheless is able to create a platform that has healthy conversations. Because if you have one guy who's just screaming nonsense, nonstop, it has this effect where the quiet voices at the back of the room are silenced. So that's what you usually don't talk about. If you let one annoying, loud person in, that's actually censoring the voice of a lot of people that would like to speak, but they don't get a chance. That's one of the things, especially around trans discourse, I have to constantly do that reminder from my audiences. When I'm dealing with these types of people on the internet, a lot of them might seem really crazy, a lot of these types of people might seem insane, but in the real world, outside of the crazy Twitter activist world, the vast majority of people you're meeting from LGBT communities are the coolest, normalist people. All they want is to write to live their life in the way they want to, and to be unobstructed. But people will get this impression of an online activist, like a vegan or LGBT person or whatever. And then they think that every single person in real life is like that, and it's a really negative stereotype. And then even the other people in that group.

Maria the Streamer (03:15:51)

Oh, is Malena coming over? Oh, yeah, I don't know if that's her. Okay, Malena just joined us. What were we talking about? Was it interesting? You were saying that you were going to talk to Elon about getting at Omni Destiny, the verified Twitter account on Bandai. So that sounds like a lot. That's so gracious of you. I can't even believe you would do that for me. And then you admitted that you tried to evade the band multiple times, which I'm sure would be very looked upon. You know, I heard that in Norway in their prison system, they don't actually punish you for trying to escape jail because that's like the natural human thing to do. How do you? What are they? I don't know if they, but they don't punish you because of course, you're trying to be free. That's all I'm trying to be on Twitter. I'm just trying to be free. Oh, that's the natural humanistic. Yeah, that's the natural humanistic. Yeah, of course, it's the band event. You're not a destructive force. You're just a positive. I'm a force for good. That's why all my accounts only get banned for banning, banning, don't get banned for doing bad things. And I'm a progressive show. I'm like far left. I love like progressive process. This is what you criticize us on for being. I show them from a place of first principles, not from a mindless AI echoing kind of thing. You know, okay, so you're free thinking, but I got exactly. All right, cool. Well, I'm sure we'll return to some politics. That was beautiful. Maria, can you tell us about yourself? You also follow streamer. Yes, I stream and I started streaming because I met him, basically, kind of, but I don't do the politics. I do like travels, we're talking about relationships, talk to my audience, basically. You're from that part of the world, right? Yeah, exactly. So did you escape from prison? And they didn't. That was Norway. It was different. I actually really I've been to Sweden a bunch of times. I love it. There's a tech sector that that's really like flourishing. Where did you go? Where did you city? I went to Stockholm. I think I gave a few lectures there. There's a vibrant tech sector in school and people are super nice. Yeah, we're friendly. We're not like very deep. Like we're not really how much deep conversation is like a meta. Oh, there's not many intellectuals that come from Sweden. We don't really speak very highly ourselves. We kind of like just chill all the time. We don't make a scene. We don't we're just like, you know, you know, the name for that is there's a specific name for it. It's a login. Yeah, the login. Yeah, yeah, the login. Oh, there's a philosophy behind it. When you're part of like Sweden or Norway, you're like, you don't talk to highly of yourself because it's seen as kind of like rude. Like think of like America is the exact opposite. You don't even really want to like you don't want to make yourself into a victim too much. You don't want to be too much of anything. You're just like stick into the to the group to make big scene about yourself. But that said, you came here and you were you put yourself in front of a camera and became a streamer. Yeah, do you understand how weird that is for my friends in Sweden? Do you have a society? I just didn't talk about myself and just like make a big deal about myself for hours every day. Was that like terrifying? Did you have anxiety about that? No, because I don't see them. But then I come back and I'm like, oh, what do you feel like when you're actually streaming? You feel like you're just alone in a room? One on one type of thing. No, I see. I see Chad. I'm thinking, oh, they're like a little fairies. They're not really real. They're just like out there. I don't know what they look like. I just see little names and they're just cute and just colors, you know, you're talking to little fairies inside your head.

Chad (03:18:47)

Yeah, I do. Is that how you feel about chat? They're demons for me. They're demons. Okay, my own fairies. Are they so is Chad a source of stress or happiness? Like is there a communication? No, for me, it's a source of happiness. I've been very intentional with like the construction of my community. So I'm really happy with where it's at. Are you able to actually have deep political discourse while playing a video game at the same time? I have a really good chat room in terms of like the way that people engage in conversations. Like I was one of the earliest people to embrace the philosophy of like, I am in total control of what people watch me think, that like I have a high level of responsibility for how they conduct themselves. And then if I conduct myself in a certain way, I can expect a certain level of conduct from them. And for the most part, it's like worked pretty well for the past, you know, nine or ten years. Yeah. What about the actual playing of the game? Like you're able to parallelize the brain like, oh, like it seems like factory seems like a super complex game. Yeah, I don't actually think that's possible. I don't think multitasking for a human brain is possible. If you see me playing a game, usually what's happening is the conversation is like, I've had it a million times. So I'm not thinking about it. I've automated that. Or if the conversation is very challenging, then if you watch me, if you really watch what's happening again, I'm probably just running around in circles, because I have to think about the conversation. Okay. Because with factory, it looks like a lot of stuff is going on. Sometimes, yeah. So I guess hard for a person has to play the game to detect that you're not actually talking about. Your super intelligent multitask, or does a common of is like, he's not interested in this conversation at all. Yeah. Yeah, there's a cool ness to it. Like when you're not paying attention, like if you're looking elsewhere, like you're checking your phone, you're too cool for this conversation. There's a sense like that. Yeah, the reality is, though, is if you watch, it was easier to see in Minecraft, because in Minecraft, when there was a challenging conversation, if you watch me play, I'm literally just running around and jumping in circles, because I have to think about the conversation 100%. I can't do a complicated task and think about the conversation. Or like that people always joke in my chat, like, oh no, the notepad came out. If it's a really challenging conversation, I'll get rid of the game and I'll bring out a notepad and I'll start writing stuff down to keep track of what's going on. Yeah. So what kind of stuff do you stream? So advice? You talk about a relationship? Yeah, like either I talk to chatter, I travel around, basically. Like, I could have a conversation or we like, go to countries. I've been to like Italy, I was in Italy for like one and a half months, just like traveling around the alone, going to cities, like having like my camera with me and like streaming for hours. Where's the coolest place you've been to? Ever. It's probably New Zealand. New Zealand? I think so. Yeah. After it is probably going to be Italy, I think. Big set like history. Also both history because New Zealand is also beautiful. It is both natural beauty and historical beauty.

Relationship Matters

Home (03:21:19)

Yeah, for sure. I think it's just really like the like the pollination sort of culture. I think it's very interesting. Like the ocean people and it's just really beautiful. People are very relaxed, chill. They're very far away, which is interesting as well because whenever they talk about politics, so they talk about just like the world, it feels really far away. So where's home for you? Is Austin home? Did you? Home for me. So a human being is home? Yeah. We travel. We've lived in a lot of different places and traveled around. Yeah. So that's what you think of home is like human. I think so. Yeah. I mean, if they're going to be a place, it's probably going to be like my childhood places probably. Yeah. Like my old country house or something like that. We don't have it anymore, but like that's like home for me, I guess. So how'd you guys meet each other? You're currently married. Yes. To each other, yeah. Yeah. To each other. Just making sure all the time. All right, cool. How'd you guys meet? I was watching his YouTube stuff like 2018, I think, like because it was this featured election around that time and I was interested in politics. And then I think he said in one of his videos that he had an Instagram and that he needed people to stop DMing him. That wasn't PewDiePie's. And then I messaged him and said, am I a PewDiePie? And then you're applied in like two minutes. And then that's when I was in New Zealand. And I guess you wanted to escape America or like LA for a little bit and include New Zealand. Where were you mentally there? Because we've talked to this timeline. Where's 2018? Was it 1819? Where was the low point? That was way early. Low point, Carver cleaning. That was like 2010. Oh, okay. 2018 was probably your peak. Every day now is my peak. What do you mean? That was my peak. Why would you say that? No, nobody ever admits being past their prime. Just, just see. Well, I mean, my prime is probably around the time where you were getting a lot of lefties through your community and you were really like thinking about that they would go too far. Maybe that was, I think that was still one of his son and Vash were both in my community. Exactly. So I would say it feels like there was not really like much issues when it come to your stuff or like your work stuff back then.

Old Twitch (03:23:29)

Oh, something we didn't talk about is that like, there were no politics on Twitch. I exclusively inhabited that place for like two years because nobody else did it because it was a really toxic environment for politics. So for a couple of years as it grew, like the, I kind of grew the whole space because it wasn't nobody was doing it. What does that look like? You're having like political debates, political discourse. Yeah, mainly like going into YouTube people to try to argue with them or just doing politics on stream, like reading stories, researching stuff, talking about stuff. But there's not like other people on Twitch to debate about politics because there was no politics. It was, yeah. Was there a debate in the space of communism, socialism, social democrats, kind of like this? Are you trying to outline your own position during that time? I think it was mainly me fighting against conservatives because it was like Trump stuff. And then it was coming off the back of like, there was this movement called Gamer Gate and there was all this anti-SJW stuff on the internet. And I was like the SJW, like the progressive that was fighting on the progressive side of things. So I think that's what I was known for. But I was fighting with people off of Twitch because on Twitch, there weren't very many political discussions happening. So you were holding the SJW flag? Yeah. To what degree do you still hold it? Like what's the best? What's the steelman case for SJW? I mean, like I'm still very much that SJW from 2018, 2019, but the positions have moved so much farther left that some people may not call me that anymore. I'm not sure. It depends on who I'm talking to. It was basically what is social justice where like being sensitive to the experience of others. Yeah. Being sensitive and empathetic towards the experience of others and then trying to build a better world that suits as many different types of people as possible while being like aware of like their names. Okay. So you guys met, from your perspective, she telling why is it accurate? No, it's pretty accurate. Okay. When you guys actually meet. I flew out in 2019. I had a new in February. Yeah. Basically, there was like weird stuff happening in LA. I just come off of kind of a weird, not kind of sort of relationship. And I just wanted to like go away for a while. Another company reached out to me and they had like a fun streaming device and they said they'd sponsor a trip if I went somewhere and I was like, oh, well, I know this person. I know a couple of people in New Zealand, Molina was one of them. It's like, I'll go to New Zealand. New Zealand, it'll be fun. And yeah, I did that for two weeks. Do you guys believe in love? I feel like you lack the gotcha, got us into this. I'm not sure to just agree to which you have human emotions. I have quite a few. Okay. From your perspective, when did you when did you fall in love with me? When you fall in love with Melly Mel? The minute I saw her, I don't know. We, our first two weeks together were a lot of fun. We had a lot of chemistry in person. I was kind of shocked. I wasn't thinking about it because it was like we spent like a week together and you said, I really want to tell you something and you really, I don't remember that. You were like, stalling that for the longest time. I think she was. Oh, she said, like, I love you. No, he basically just said, like, I really like you and it never really happens. That's what he said. And I was like, no, and I thought, hey, I thought. But let's still run. We said Trump getting banned from Twitter. Is that what we were talking about before? Oh, yeah. Hey, you agree to me coming on here? Of course, I'm going to be doing those. How long? So how long did I take two weeks? He said, like two, like a week. No, I don't know. I think it was just like thing is my mind processes like information so quickly. Two weeks to somebody like you was actually like years for me. So, like me. Yeah, there was like a lot of like factorial type of strategic thinking. Yeah, going on. I was seeing like all the events, like Dr. Strange or whatever in the Avengers when he's like seeing into all the futures. I was like, you saw me, you just saw the future. Yeah, I was looking at all of them. Yeah. You're doing like some game theoretic simulation of all the possible outcomes. Exactly. Okay. But no, yeah, it was probably pretty soon.

Dating Melina (03:27:01)

I realized that we had a lot of chemistry. Yeah. I think before I left after my two weeks there, I was like, we need to make sure you got like a ticket to come visit me in the United States because it'll be fun and everything. And then I kind of decided that last minute too. It was like really like five hours before you fly back. We kind of realized because it was kind of like men is just like a one-time thing. And then I was like, oh no, this is a lot of fun. We should probably hang out again. Oh, so you realized you would miss each other? Yeah. Yeah. This is one time thing. The melancholy side of love. Okay, what did you fall in lowest, dude? I thought he like hated me. I don't know. I thought not hated me. She still thinks I hated it. But no. No, I remember like what he said that he really liked me. I was kind of a little shocked about that because I don't know. There was a lot of like random things happening in New Zealand. It was a lot of fun, but it was definitely like very interesting like things that happen because I I was like around a lot of other people as well. So I thought he might have had like a really bad time. But when he said that I was thinking about it more and then we spent like more time together like a week after then and it felt like that was more like real. And I think when he was about to leave, I kind of realized like, no, I really like him. Do you guys ever say love to each other? Like I love you? Yeah, of course. Yeah. Okay. All right. I wasn't sure. Why would you ask that? What has he said before? Because I haven't I haven't I don't think I've heard you speak. The only time I've heard to talk about love is when you're like criticizing the the right pill community saying they don't ever talk about love and relationships. Almost all the time I'm giving criticism to people. Like I said, I'm kind of stepping in. I'm very disconnected from my own emotional experience because I'm trying to talk with him there. So it's pretty rare that I'll talk about what is your own emotional experience exactly? Highly blunted, I guess. There's a lot. Okay. I mean, what's the what's deep in there? Are you is this just who you are, genetically? Or are you running for something? I think I have a pretty good understanding of myself. A lot of people make that accusation of me, but I don't think I am. Okay. This is just who you are. It's just who I am. Okay. There's not childhood stuff like trauma. It's all sorted and done. You figured it all out? Yeah. In your old age, as I grow every year, I figure out more and more. He did mention, I think I heard this somewhere that this is a source of fights for the two of you, the age thing. I felt the ageism throughout this whole conversation. He's saying that it gambles with time. He's just like, I think she will be good later. And then just like, like an investment. Yeah. That's like what he's doing. When this treasure bond matures, I'm going to be able to cash out for a good idea. What do you think so far as the stocks going up or? It's tumultuous. It's like Bitcoin. Yeah, like Bitcoin.

Talia's open and long-distance relationship (03:29:30)

All right. If you guys don't mind, what an interesting aspect of your relationship is your end and open relationship. What's that like? From a game theoretic simulation perspective, what went into that calculation? And like, how does that like how that started or how did that started? Sure. The only relationships I've ever done has been open relationships since I was like in high school, because I didn't really understand like why wouldn't you be able to like do other things but other people, but then just like have your main partner, basically. So what is an open relationship? Generally speaking, that means you have one main partner? Not a monogamous relationship. Like you're somehow allowed like in different ways. You can see other people sexually. Sexually. But like, there's one main doesn't have to be there for some people. But like, I think it's probably easier and we probably don't really have time or the energy for like more than like one person to like really like. What about like emotional? It's really complicated. There's a lot of complicated stuff going on under the hood there. Yeah. I think broadly speaking, you've got like polyamorous relationships and you've got like open relationships where polyamorous is like, oh, I've got like three different girlfriends and we all hang out or sometimes even live together or three boyfriends or whatever. And then you've got like open relationships, which is like, oh, you know, like you can basically hook up with other people and then you've got like your main relationship and that's it. I think ours is probably somewhere in the middle of that to where like we've got like long-term friends, some of them we hook up with. And that's kind of how we, yeah, it's a delicate dance that explodes every six months on itself. So it does explode. You guys fight over it? We fight over some things. Yeah. It thinks about it. I think it's mostly because a lot of people can handle it and they agree to something and then they realize that we're way too cool. And then they get really obsessed and they think that they can like get in there and then it gets really dramatic. Have you figured it out? Like, I feel like we figure out things more and more like when it comes to like, what's a good person for us to hang out and what's not a good person for us to hang out with? Or like, I probably have more opinions on like who he hangs out with because he likes the fucking psychos. Yeah. So you like the sort of, you like the not like the crazy ones, like the baby traps sort of women. That's the ones and I don't like that because that affects me. That affects your game theoretic. Yeah, obviously. Right. You like to surround yourself like in general, you've talked about with crazy people. I say crazy and I really shouldn't. It's a humor. It's like, yeah, it's very unstable. Very can be unstable. But people that are very unique. Like, when I meet this person, that's like, not boring. Yeah, not boring. Yeah. And do you say that you're progressively becoming not boring yourself? No, I think I'm pretty stable. I don't love them. I think my mind should. So you don't think they affect your not that if I've said that, I said a joke and I think I've like, I've got my stuff like really well figured out. It's what allows me to engage with people like this so easily because I can engage. I can make them feel seen and heard. And then if it gets insane, I can cut off and I can be chill. Like very few things affect me in the long term. Do you guys experience jealousy? Usually, like whenever I feel like he's not spending the like the amount of time that I'm asking for, and he spends it on his video games or his stream or like he sees someone else like more than he sees me or something like that, that would like not be good. Because then it affects like our relationship. Do you have a good sense of like, is it literally time or is it the energy put into the? It's probably like if like if he's with me that like the attention in the time, like when he hangs out with me and then there's also probably the time. So if I feel like something else is distracting too much, like it could be work or it could be a friend or it could be anything. Like if I feel like it starts to take away from like me, then I'm having an issue with it. I don't think he really cares much. I guess the only jealousy you experience is probably when you feel like like if I get upset about him seeing someone too much and then I go see someone more and then he's like why can I go see my friend more like as much as you. So like that's the sort of like thing that we're trying to navigate on I guess. I think we are like diametrically opposed sometimes in terms of how we view like engagement with people or engagement with the world sometimes. So like on her end of the spectrum, like a perfect week for her might be like being in a cabin, watching like fireflies at night, going hiking every morning, going swimming at the beach, because it's like you're taking in like the grandeur of nature, you're like connected with yourself, you're like very at peace, everything is like chill and cool, there's the wind, the feeling of nature, everything. That's like her peak living experience. And like being present. Yeah. And like my peak experiences are like people trying to destroy my life, like the challenge of like navigating really complicated discussion, like you know, several different dramatic events unfolding that my and my career like these things are like very, I like the stress and the action and the entertainment and everything is like very cool for me. So when we're together, she generally wants me to be like more chill, but if I don't feel like I'm being like stimulated a lot, then it's easy for like my mind to wander or like my life. To wander somewhere else or yeah, that's kind of the issue. Yeah, we have a very different way of like engaging with the world. So how can you find happiness and stillness? I feel like if we're just like aware of it, and we're trying our best like whenever we like we're supposed to do this one thing. So let's say that we want to go to New York and I'm like we should just like go out and do this one specific thing, we try to find something that he enjoys doing. Like now that we're in Texas, we can go shooting or do something fun that he enjoys that we can do it. And then I think like just like for me also to be aware that like when he spends a lot of time on crazy people, it's not because he like loves them or wants to be with them. It's just because he likes being like having having his life destroyed. Like you said, which I don't really do, it's a completely different thing. So like for me to like understand more like how he's thinking because it's so different from mine and for him to understand how I'm thinking about things and like what I prioritize in my life. I think that's like how we navigate. But I think it's good. I think the differences can be good like when we're finding a way. Well, I think you're relatable. More of a universe. I'm definitely very difficult to get along with. Like I always tell people that like if you're dating me for like more than a few years, like you get like an award for that. It's like a war zone that you've survived. Absolutely. You're like a veteran, you get a medals and stuff. And it's always like I think there's probably been like six different. I don't think she says it anymore. But there are like six different times in our relationship where she's like, is it always like this? Is this actually? And like every next year, it's like, you were relying about that. Well, it got worse. You were like, no, it's just like right now I'm having a huge argument online about saying that and we're in private. It's just gonna be like this and I'm gonna be streaming 24 hours a day. And I'm like, we're like, why are you gonna come to bed? It's been a week.

Has Talia ever become one of the "crazy" people... (03:35:53)

I did playing league coming into this a little bit. I'm clean of league like six months right now. What do you hate about legal aid? I never got the humans. Well, speaking of which, I my participation in league involved on the robot side. Good. Because that's an improvement. Because both the star guard too and and legal legends because opening AI and deep mind both participate in creating bots in those I was a professional sucker of two players. So I remember when the AI started to play, it's interesting the types of restrictions that you would have to put on like a gaming robot to make it like functional and not totally unfair to the other side. Yeah, to make a human like. Yeah, was that interesting to you to see AI be able to play those video games? I think in some ways, people think things are more complicated than they actually are. And I think video games is one of those things are like, Oh my God, there's like a million possibilities at every second and who not. And it's like, no, there's like three or four things going at any point in time. And I'm willing to bet that like an AI could probably solve some of these games, like pretty easily, especially if there are no constraints on how they can learn. Can I talk to you about relationships? Yeah, we already have. So yeah, I know. But more generally speaking, we didn't get a chance to talk about the red pill community.

Red Pill Community (03:37:01)

Oh, sure. Well, first of all, what is the red pill community, the atmosphere in general? I'd love to get both of your opinions on this share. I know, I know you're probably not as opinionated on that. What do you think I am? Like probably not as you like as much as you, but I do have opinions. You do? Okay. And you should really don't like speak out too much on it, because I feel like there's like a language barrier. I don't know. That's why I don't really do politics because there's my second language. Yeah, that's right. You have to know the a lot of it. A lot of it like, you know, how to use have to use derogatory terms every other sentence. So they understand you, right? Exactly. I don't know anything about that. It's too bad. It's like a good like you need to be able to like speak really well for people to take your seriously, I think. And like, that's a thing. Like if I don't have like the words and I don't have that, like I can't pronounce things correctly. Yeah. And it gets all person searching for words look stupid. Essentially, that's how people view it. Tell me about it. I have a podcast that people listen to and I mumble and they yeah. Wait, is your what's your first language? Russian. Okay. But I speak both languages horribly. I just not, I'm not like, there is definitely a big disconnect between my brain and my mouth module. Like, I'm not able to generate the thoughts efficiently. Like the things you're able to do like that, like speak like that. I'm not. It's very, very tough. Plus there's huge amount of anxiety and social interaction that I have, which makes speaking even harder. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's tough. I understand. Gotcha. I can make sense. Yeah. The gotcha is both a symbol of compassion and derision at once. I'm just letting you know, I understand what you say. I'm just going to sit there and start you. No, you can just say like, yeah, get it. Like, yeah, I get it. I gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. No, it's so, it's so short. I got you. Say, say it's longer sentence, but that means the same thing. I understand you. That's good. That's like not chills. You know, you get chills. So like, you understand me. Yeah. It feels good. Yeah. I hear you. I hear you. And like, if you just like hold the other person's hand, let's see if I'm bad. Maybe I got to put in some emotion there. Okay. Show that you have some. I understand. What do you think about? Gotcha. What do you think about Red Pill? What, sorry, what is it, first of all, for people? I don't know. Yeah. The Red Pill community, obviously, it's the matrix reference. The Red Pill that you take is when you realize what dating standards and norms really are in the world, that men are providers and have to become some great thing to hunt and attract, you know, the woman who are just kind of there, floating around looking for people to give them the most resources. And it's like coming to a realization of what the world of dating really is broken away from the Hollywood standards and the romantic stuff that they try to sell you in, you know, stores. So there was kind of, maybe you can kind of educate men this, but Red Pill used to be associated with just maybe anti-establishment use. I don't know. Maybe Republican conservative viewpoints. People use red pill a lot in like different communities. Like when you say the Red Pill community, yeah, that usually means dating. The dating thing. But a lot of people say, "Oh, Trump voters, they're red pill. Are you red pill on like politics?" Whatever people say stuff like that. Yeah. Okay. Cool. And then there's like the Manosphere, that's all the similar type of stuff. And Andrew Tate is somebody that represents kind of the figurehead of the Manosphere, like the Red Pill stuff. Yeah, I would say so. I'm pretty sure. All right. Cool. So what are some ideas that they represent and what do you think about them? I think they do a good job at speaking to disaffected young men who feel like the rest of the world has kind of left them behind or isn't willing to speak to them. And they do identify some true and real problems. Feels like on the left, we have a really hard time doing like self-improvement or telling people how to better themselves. We focus too much on like structural or systemic issues rather than what can an individual do to uplift or empower themselves. And it also feels like they do a good job at speaking to some of the positive aspects of masculinity, that it's okay to be like strong and brave and a soldier and a warrior and provide for your family and blah, blah, so I would say those are like positive messages, like self-improvement and everything that come from the Red Pill community. What's the negative? I think the analysis on how men and women interact is a way to transactional. All of like the romanticism and love and chemistry is totally sucked out of it. Everything is very like sex based, like how do you basically have sex with the most amount of women possible and that's going to make you happy. And then I think people's motivations sometimes are just spoken about in such a shallow, derogatory way that I don't think it's always reflective of reality. Like women only want you because you make six figures and you're tall and a guy only wants you because he wants to have sex with you and blah, it feels like there's a lot of that going on a lot. Yeah, and that misses some fundamental aspect about relationships, about meaningful relationships and so on. I don't think I've never heard Red Pill people ever, ever talk about like meaningful relationships. It's always just how to get in one or how to have sex really. Mel, we'll bother you about some of that philosophy. I feel like the people that are like the Red Pill people, I feel like their solution is something that doesn't actually work out. Like where it works out for some people, people that makes a lot of money is like really successful and that's right away. But it's not going to help most men out there. So I feel like it's just like a pointless like speech to give to these like really lost guys. And they really do believe that they can like they can become successful, they can get money and like when they get all these things that can get girls, but most of them is not going to achieve that ever. To get the money part or become successful. Just become a billionaire, you know, like and you will get all the girls and which is true, but not everyone can do that. So I feel like when these guys are speaking to these men and they're just like, we just care about these men out there, you know, they need to hear this. It doesn't really help a lot of them. And it doesn't inspire them to develop compassion towards the opposite sex, which is probably something required to have a relationship. And also like they seem to complain a lot about women, like only wanting men that have money and that's tall and that's muscular, whatever, you know, all those things. But they complain about that, but that's like also kind of what they're trying to make the men try to do for themselves. So they kind of like falling to the same sort of behavior. And it seems like they're kind of unaware of that as well. They're just playing a part of the game instead of trying to find a woman that doesn't look for those things and that are looking for not those things. Yeah. I actually would love to have like straight up data on people in that world versus not in that world, how often they get laid. Yeah. Like literally, so I think for sure, people in that world have fewer meaningful long term relationships that are fulfilling, that actually helped them succeed in life, that helped them be happy and content and all that kind of stuff. But just even the straight up the shallow goal of getting laid, I wonder, because it's very possible that like just the roughness with which they treat intellectually women that might lead to lower success, not higher success. It's very adversarial, which I think is always disappointing. Anything that talks about men and women, I think it's good to acknowledge differences. But when it becomes like adversarial, especially when you talk about sex, sex is something that men are getting and it's in that women are giving and that type of trade off and the way they talk about it is like, yeah, it sets people against each other in a really toxic way, I think. How do you talk to people from that world, from the red pill world? Like would you ever talk to somebody like Andrew Tate?

Viewer Influence And Relationship Dynamics

Can you encourage a different mindset in people who watch you? (03:44:23)

Oh, yeah, I had the chance to. I've been on the Fresh and Fit podcast every time. And then I've got a friend, Snico, who's like very red pill, that stuff. If I'm trying to talk to them, usually it's kind of like approaching a scared cat. The first thing you have to do is like be very gentle and say like, I understand your issues, I understand your complaints. I know that you're I'm scary because you think I'm going to say like toxic masculinity and feminism and all these scary words at you. So the first thing is always to recognize it like a lot of what they talk about. There are like true aspects to what they're talking about that people on the left won't recognize. So I think it's good to acknowledge those things that like men and women are kind of different. We do look for different things in general when it comes to relationships. It's okay to say that. It's not there's something bad there. And then it'll usually be like once I've got your trust and I'm in your bubble, like let's talk about the things that you want and maybe some of the strategies that you're employing aren't necessarily going to get you some of the things that you want. So for instance, if you're really worried about like shallow girls like ruining your life, like Malina said, it's probably not best to build your entire worldview around trying to get shallow girls that are going to ruin your life. Like if you're a way of attracting a girl is to go to the gym, get a whole bunch of money and try to like flaunt your wealth as much as possible, you're going to be attracting the very same type of women that you're here like decrying on your stream. I think we talked about that on the podcast. Like you probably want to have a woman that's going to be there if you lose your job. It's still there. Like that cares about the things that's not just your job. It's more stable. And also I don't help you become a great man or a great like grow. Like I feel like a great friendship and a partnership. Like it helps me make you a better person. Some of the most successful people I know and they have families and there's clearly a dynamic there that's like that makes them they wouldn't be that without. They're not an island. Yeah. And the kids actually are a big part of that too. Like for most people, if you're like a good parent, they make you step up somehow in life. You have to take responsibility for getting your shit together and excelling in ways that I guess the philosophy of the Red Bull does not quite get to. That's always an interesting thing. I've asked that a couple times where it's like, would you let your daughter date and your date? And it's always funny to watch them kind of like squirm around those answers sometimes. But see if they if they don't have a daughter, like I don't have a daughter, I think your whole philosophy changes once you have a daughter. Sure. You can feel that like they can they know that with their answer, they feel a little bit weird about it. It's funny to watch them. Like they even they know it's like, I don't know. Well, they might say like I want my daughter to date like a high value male to the degree that he's a high value male. Yes. But like I don't think you'll feel that way. The definition of high value changes complete for sure. Certainly the stereotypical measures the value contribute to the calculation. But there's so much more than that, I think, the chemistry of the whole thing is bigger. You've also mentioned about body count. You guys both have a high body count. Does body count matter? Or depends, like you said, it's low in some people's eyes. It's high in other people's eyes. Does body count matter in relationships? It's the past matter. Well, the past matters. I don't think body count. Not to me. I don't really care. Not just as it is. No. I mean, it could be. It could be. It could be. Yeah. Well, the past is who you are, right? Like somebody tells me like they have a 200 body count and they're 16. Something's probably going on there that's not good. I was thinking about that too. Like, because it could be like really young people that are having some sort of like mental groups going on or yeah, 45 and they've like never had sex before. There's probably something going on, right? So I could be indicative. But if somebody's like in their twenties and they've had sex with, you know, 100 people or 50 people, whatever, it's, you know, whatever. It's more experienced.

Does Body Count Matter when it comes to relationships? (03:47:57)

It can be good. Sure. Okay. So that just represents your like, sexually open. And so it doesn't really necessarily mean any kind of, not necessarily. It could though. The number of loans doesn't mean anything. Yeah. Okay. Well, you could meet a guy that's like, I just really, really like want to fuck a lot of people because it makes me so cool. Like, you're gonna be someone like that, which is like, maybe the body count doesn't matter. But like, where it comes from. Like, yeah, like, why, why have you stepped up to be what you stepped up? Yes. Does it hurt like the romantic aspect of the relationship knowing that there's a lot of people in the past? I don't know. Not for us. No. Is a part of the relationship fundamentally romantic?

Max's Experience of Love and Romance (03:48:33)

For us? Yeah. Okay. What? You come up with such a cold person. No, I was just in my head thinking I wanted to just say got you right there. It's so judgmental. I think when it comes to the sex thing, there's always like the way that I explain it is. And I understand like, I have to say this because I don't advocate for what I do for everybody or what she does for everybody. Because obviously, there's a whole bunch of natural feelings of jealousy that pop up for a lot of people. But when people ask me, you know, it's always like, Oh, like, isn't this like horrible that you guys are doing this and you don't love each other? From my perspective, I can have sex with like any person and it can be sex. Like, that's not like a special thing between two people in my eyes. It's like anybody can have sex. But there are like certain activities and ways you can spend time with each other, where you're like carving out these like precious little moments in time with a certain person that can do things that are special to that person. And those are the kind of like events that I remember more than anything else. So like the idea of like, like, Oh, wow, I had sex with a person that was so special doesn't mean as much as like, you know, us traveling to like New Zealand or sharing some special moment doing like some really fun activity or event or whatever. That's usually how I like it. So shared intimate moment. Yeah, I kind of agree, but I can definitely connect the romance with sex boy. I'm curious what you can see. That's where the red pill is, right? That's exactly. We've also talked about misogyny, which is clearly the embodiment of that. What were you saying? So there's some there's a connection between romance and yeah, I think it is because I think sex could be a lot of things, right? It's it's some sort of bonding, I'd say, in some way, they say that you really like BDSM, you kind of like you become submissive to someone or you take control over someone is like in a very bonding like intimate moment, I'd say. And that's romantic. The intimacy is romantic. I think it is if you can show yourself is really submissive or like weak, or you have like absolutely no control over yourself and you let someone else do it, or you are the one being that like you are the dominant for someone. I think that's a really like intimate thing because you show like the weakest part of yourself, kind of. I just feel like I personally, to me, some component romantic, but to me, this is not judging to all this to me, maybe his hall is brought up.

Mia's Comparison of Max's Open-ness to Sweden (03:50:34)

The romance increases if the number of intimate interactions are limited to one person. Like for me, for some reason, spreading it out decreases exponentially the feeling of romance, if you are that I don't know what that could be just like sort of having grown up in the Soviet Union. There's a kind of the fairy tale stories, and you're kind of maybe living through them. Yeah, I mean, I think what you're saying is like really normal. Like most people probably show that way. But because you guys are able to successfully not do that, I just want to question my own understanding of it, you know, like, like why is that? Why is that? Why am I being very jealous for no reason? Like maybe you can maximize the number of intimate experiences if you just open up and let go of jealousy, essentially. I think I feel like in Sweden, like in Scandinavia, we're extremely just actually open, like in general. We're not like super religious either. We're very like relaxed. We don't like we don't feel bad about ourselves. Like it's just like a different sort of thing. And I would say like it's we're more progressive when it comes to feminism and stuff. So it's more commonly will meet women with a higher body count than like when I meet like American girls, all of them are like vaginists, like super suppressed, like sexually and yeah, like what did you just use? They have like issues to like they can't relax during sex or just hurts for them. Vaginists. So you're really nervous. Vaginists, but it's not what it's called. Yeah. So like I meet so many girls that are having like a lot of issues with sex and they have like a very low body count because they just can't relax or they yeah and it's probably and usually they come from like a very religious background. So they have just been told like you cannot worry that you cannot be like that. You can't like you know and like where I grew up, it wasn't like that at all. Would you see it as more like a casual thing? So then you can just maximize the awesomeness of the experience. Yeah, I guess I don't have trouble with it. Exactly. I think the important thing I think for everybody to realize is there's always pros and cons to everything. Like my lifestyle, like obviously I get to have a lot of fun experiences. That's like a huge pro and that's super cool. And if you're like a more monogamy brain person, you're not going to get those experiences. But if you're a monogamy brain person, like when you're sharing that special moment in time with somebody else, like that moment could be really, really, really special because now it's the thing that you're showing yourself and opening yourself up to another person and they're only trusting you to do that. And that's like a really special thing that only the two of you are sharing with each other. So I mean like there's always like pros and cons to everything. Like I think we both would say like like doing an open relationship is probably not like we would not recommend it. Yeah, no, I think we would know. Yeah, I recently fasted for three days and they ate a chicken breast at the end of that and it was like the most delicious food I've ever eaten. So like there's some aspect of fasting and scarcity and so on that like and you have to figure out what for your own psyche what works the best. It's good to be a little bored or like not do something or like work because you can just enjoy the time when you're doing something really fun.

Defending Women in Streaming (03:53:35)

It's more fun. Otherwise you're just going to get numb in general with everything. Yeah. Yeah, I personally just never get bored. Like I guess the the boring thing is exciting to me. The just like you're like me because everything I like is boring. I got to ask you we talked about misogyny in the he's trying to battle it out on the internet. What's your what's your sense as a woman about the level of misogyny and the internet and the streaming community and how to fight it? For me because I guess I get it every single day somehow like because I have an online like I have a chat that goes that's live right and but I have like mods moderating that all the time so I don't really need to see much of it. I think it's just pretty annoying because you get to like see it all the time. So it's become like background noise. Yeah a little bit it's like the same comments over and over again but it's usually for me I don't personally care that much. I understand that other people do especially when it comes into like when there's like a lot of sexism and stuff and when there's a lot of like men not taking women seriously like I definitely get that and I used to get that even more like a few years ago with my accent and everything and like I used to be blonde as well like a few months ago because I feel like people wouldn't take me seriously because of that. That's a bit annoying but I feel like it's pretty easy to like see through when someone acts that way and for me personally I don't really care but and it's a bit annoying like being online and like getting stuff every single day. It would say like the probably the worst thing is when you feel like you put in a lot of effort into some sort of work everyone is just going to say you just got that because you're a woman and you're attractive and that's that's probably like the worst thing. Is there a way to fight that you think? Yeah I don't think you can. I think it just comes up all the time. It's just like it is what it is I guess. You just get to keep doing whatever you do and like not let it like emotionally control you somehow. I think having more women in those spaces is always good. It's probably good yeah. Like a lot of the guys who can tell online that they don't have. Don't bring on the worst ones then. Stop seeing she's being with me. She just did it. She did the misogyny thing by having some bad women on she's saying all women to you. Well you know it's true right. So I disagree with you and I'm older than both of you and therefore wiser right so. Well combined we're older than you thought. I think we're both. We're one of the only match. We've got combined age. It could be the same thing as like also the age thing and like the woman thing. A lot of people think that I'm just copying every single thing that he says which I think has been annoying as well. So I can never really like. Hosanna Keweser of that one. Yeah which has been annoying. It was about the Defining Police. I like friendship, camaraderie and love and respect which you both have had for a time and have lost it and I would like you to regain it. Let's try to increase that decrease the amount of love in the space.

Does Madalyn Like Samis Language? (03:56:23)

What do you think about some of the harshness of this of his language which we talked about? Our word in the past when you used N word all of that kind of stuff. When you what do you use to do? I mean. No like what do you think about it? Like do you give him advice? To not speak a certain way. No like a little more civility. I'm just trying to get a second opinion on this. Second opinion of. Army people not Internet people are way more extreme than. Yeah yeah. Yeah. No that's not true. Okay so here's saying for me okay. I was not online until three years ago at all. Like I would watch YouTube. That's pretty much all I would do. I wouldn't do anything else. Really I didn't create playing video games or anything. It sounded like extremely new to everything. So when I came into this world and I started seeing clips from him in the past. I don't think I really had much of an opinion because it just sounded like it was just a different like words that we used to be using but it didn't mean anything. That's what it feels like. It was just like if you're saying the R word it's because you just want to call someone stupid but you want to like do it a little bit more. But it's not like it didn't feel like it was like a it's not like racist more like you know it's not agreement on this side. So like if he was saying the F word because it was just like a word to like insult someone and he was like I don't think he was ever I don't think you were ever homophobic back in the day or anything like that but I think it was just like a way to express yourself maybe back then. I don't know I didn't do it. There's no videos of me or anything because I wasn't even online back then. So my case was I definitely don't think Stephen is homophobic or a serene of those obviously. So there's a good heart there and a good mind. I was just saying it's not being mean. I think well there is some you lose yourself and forget the bigger picture that he's pushing for more effective discourse on the internet. He's like an inspiration to a lot of people especially now of like how you can use effective conversation to make for better world to do radicalized people and so on and then you lose some of that power by losing yourself in in like the language is more language of emotion versus a effective communication. I would say it's a gray area. I would say like something that is probably recently done in that case because it's been joking about women a lot like it's women's fault they're bad like it's just it's been like a lot of jokes when it comes to misogynistic and your community and I think it's actually turned people a little bit that way. That's why we've done a recent segment. Yes so that I guess that's actually true because I don't think it was pretty I don't think it was clear enough. I don't think it actually was. I think you did that mistake but I think back then I was even saying like hey you should probably not like you probably should not do that because it actually is pretty hard for me because whenever I come into his community like his chat people are just gonna spam it's like a woman moment. It's a woman moment whenever I say something and it's kind of like yeah it's getting pretty annoying as I said it's just annoying when you see it every single day. There you go. Wisdom from somebody younger than you. Wisdom can come from all kinds of people. Yeah of course. Sometimes it's a very limited quantity it's a friend of the age. You can learn something from anybody. What advice would you give to young people the both of you that you have both audiences where young people look up to you.

Life And Career Advice

Advice to Young People (03:59:26)

In general if you were to give advice to somebody in high school like how to create a life that can be proud of what would you say. The most important thing that I've learned is to view people as different and not better or worse and when you view people as different instead of better or worse you learn that there's almost something that you can learn from anybody. Like be open and empathetic towards other people's experiences. Nobody does anything by random choice. Like there's always reasons why people act the way they do and as long as you're willing to kind of like be open and receptive to the lived experiences of other people you're going to be able to gather information and create like a more cohesive and better view of the world than any of your peers will. Do you have any kind of advice you can give to young folks? I feel like something that I see especially in America a lot is that a lot of people kind of get told what to do early on like in high school they're supposed to become this thing like education wise like they're supposed to like become a doctor or this thing or whatever and then they kind of just like give up on things that they're actually passionate about. So I think a lot of teenagers get really confused they get an education and then they get that job and they hate everything and they think that when they're when they're reaching the job when they're reaching like the journey they're going to get happy that's like where the happiness is going to be but then when they get to there they just hate everything and then they become become really depressed and I've seen this so much like I see these all the time and it's it's pretty sad to me to see so many people that are just wasting time and then they just get really confused and I don't know it's the same thing with relationships too no one really knows what they want anymore I feel like everyone is just kind of doing whatever like society is saying or the parents are saying or their friends are saying and they're never really doing anything that's super meaningful anymore and like they don't so what I would say is like try to find something that that's that is important to you it could be anything really like it's some sort of passion maybe like your friends maybe like like what matters to you like figuring those things out I think is really important and that comes from being able to listen to like some inner voice so it's not like I'm from elsewhere yeah I guess it's really hard because you're living the life and like there's things happening around you and people tell you what to do and what not to do and you know no one really has like their own opinions everyone is just kind of like listening to the the cooler thing or you know except you and she seems to stand on his own trail and we think yeah I'd say so

Streamer Mentality (04:01:51)

and like hashtag like something I realized too like because we just went to TwitchCon and we were talking to a lot of streamers how was that it was interesting I thought it was interesting because the the few people that I feel like I that seem really cool and that I look up to like in the streaming world all of them wants to quit streaming all of them wants to do it no one wants like no one likes it and they're so successful like they are around successful people they they're working every single day they're working hard they're making so much money and everyone is just complaining and like they're complaining about like not being able to see their partner or you know because they need to live somewhere else because I see these things and they seem extremely unhappy and but it's so hard for them to just like cut all these successful stuff off because that's like what you you know learn to do and that's like supposed to be like your happiness but it isn't everyone is really unhappy yeah there's something about maybe streaming is different but YouTube folks too have interacted with a few and even in podcasting space people become obsessed about the views and numbers and subscribers and stuff like that so I turn I never talk about that I don't pay attention to that I feel like that's a drug that destroys your mind your your mind is an artist ability to create for sure unique things also your mind in terms of the anxiety the ups and downs of the attention mechanism and then also being just if it's something that you make is not popular but it meant a lot to you you will think of it less yes because it's not popular yeah that's a really dangerous thing and because everyone around you is reinforcing like I'll get messages like wow this thing got this many views or something great job it's like no you don't get it like that's not that's not everyone is enforcing this like this language of views and likes and so on and it's it's correlated of course because truly impactful things will get a lot of attention often but it's not on the individual local scale like temporally is it's uh it can really fuck with your mind and then I see that in the creators they become um addicts to the algorithm lost in chasing views like we know friends that we know cool people and then they start streaming and eventually they got they're like chasing the dragon of like and they change like they yeah it's like hard to get to them clearly and there's like this is something I've always said that like one of the biggest blessings and biggest curses of humanity is we are very good at acclimating like you can become paralyzed you can have all sorts of horrible things happen to you and you'll get used to it and you'll be okay you're gonna have like a good baseline

Acclimating is a curse or a blessing (04:04:22)

but it works the other way too and that you can get more and more and more and you acclimate to it almost immediately there's like this is a phenomenon that I bet it happens in the youtube world but I know what happens in the streaming world where you're streaming 1000 viewers every day huge event happens and you blow up and you got like 15 000 viewers for a dare to and then it starts to go down and down and down and down and down and then after all the drama is tied off you're at like 3000 concurrent viewers now in the macro you went from 1000 to 3000 that feels awesome but you actually feel like shit the whole time because you're remembering when you had 10 or 15 000 and now everything feels horrible and you'll see people climb over time like fuck like but whatever that one huge streaming had like I've never like been able to and it's like dude you're doing great what's yeah that happens a lot there's so many people that we know that we find super super cool they're passionate about things they have so much interest and then they just get like so addicted to these numbers and like all the everything is just ruined like all the cool things about them is ruined because they stop doing the things that they actually like to do something else that gives them more viewers and more money and it's really sad to see and yeah that that temporary sacrifice that seems temporary is that it actually destroys you like for one time making a choice because I come across those choices often like I can do this you can kind of know what's going to be popular and not and you have to ask yourself the question like is this going to sacrifice because if people are sacrificing like intimate relationships they're sacrificing time with their family they're sacrificing time with the things that they feel good about and that they like and does something it kind of realized last year because I was working so much and I was just grinding your gardening because it was kind of new for me and then new years came by and I was like wait what did I even do like the entire year like I traveled to a bunch of places but nothing actually really meant anything to me because I felt like I was just working the entire time

Temporary sacrifice (destroying relationships and quality of life) (04:06:01)

I felt like I was just numb through the through the entire year and I was really scary um like I rented um like a super pretty house like for a week with my dad and my sister because I wanted to spend time with them but the entire time I was just streaming and I actually didn't ever like calm down and just like chill with them and I like that's like time I'll never get back I don't I don't give a shit about the money that I made that week but I lost the time and like that is really important to me and I yeah and a lot of people are doing that um and I feel like you as you said like you can definitely see that in like artists for sure I feel like if you if you look at like artists like back in the 60s or 70s I feel like things were just so much better back then and it feels like they were actually making music that meant something to them they were actually making art and I feel like today everything is just kind of like whatever is cool whatever sells whatever you know sounds in a certain way everything is kind of the same thing and everything that is very artistic and very cool is actually not that popular at all and uh that's kind of sad I think yeah of course there's now bigger mechanisms and platforms to spread stuff music so as long as you could be content with not being popular I think you can still create art yeah but not like when people get a little popular they get addicted to that so fast yeah that's weird yeah you have been somewhat good at least from my outside of perspective because I think you I can at least imagine you making choices that could make you more popular and you don't seem to make those choices like having your career like playing league but it's it is very intentional like you said like then I made that choice at every single stage of my life one is because from the perspective of being a carpet cleaner my life is way better than that was wherever would have been so I'm already doing way better than I ever thought somebody like me ever could be but then two I super love my job every time I wake up every time I fly to a place to a podcast every time I get to talk to really cool people like every single part of my job I super like if there's something I don't like I just cut it off because I don't care because I'm already making plenty of money doing what I do and why would I ever wake up and not like what I'm doing when I can like what I'm doing how do you guys find through that given that you love it and sometimes maybe lose yourself in the drug of it how do you find like work-life balance together inside a relationship like time for each other I don't it also I'm not a good person I ask what do you love more uh Mel or Effect uh Factory Factory is a really good game that's like not a fair comparison okay you're talking about one of the best cleanest games best support ever made cleanest code base yeah this is yeah it's more factory time for me starting to understand what the massaging comes from by the way is is the uh is factory legit a really good game yeah of course you have call if you're like uh do you enjoy programming of course that's all I do that's all that's okay to be like uh programming

Melina and work life balance (04:08:56)

is is the game in itself that I enjoy probably more than anything else but yeah it's very much a game like that like if you're into stuff like that like you can lose hundreds of hours like very quickly to like you have a problem and then you think of a solution and then you iterate on that over and over and over again in larger larger schemes sometimes you got to redesign stuff sometimes you got like it's a very much like that kind of guy that's you essentially building a factory like what on a foreign planet or something like that it's basically it's like a bunch of you're trying to automate different problems so that you can build bigger things so you automate bigger problems so you can build bigger things and automate bigger problems so it's more complicated than like a city building game like some city type of thing I wouldn't say it's more complicated it's more like factory is like a game of like logic like strictly like logic like it's almost like a building a circuit or something yes yeah there's like their circuitry and you've got your and orgs or gates you like there's stuff like that it's very much like that like what are the enemies in the game like what um they're like so i'm attacking try to bite you and you can get guns and shoot and kill them but it's like i thought there's like shooting going on yeah but that's like a mind i just think another problem to solve in the game basically yeah okay all right see see what we do there we just started talking about the game as we're trying oh my god that's like a game okay that's that's horrible anyway is there is that basically the struggle that's the struggle how to get human like intimate human time i feel like it was like that a little bit more in the past i feel like it's been better lately but i think it's because um when we started dating i wasn't streaming and i kind of just like gave up like my trip in New Zealand i gave up like like i left Sweden so i was just like in LA which i hate hatelei i don't like it at all it's hard to make friends that are like real that are into the same stuff as you it's it was just really hard for me to connect with anyone especially also like being a european and like being around americans was very strange so the only thing i had when i came here was him and i um and i didn't expect that situation because yeah because we had we had like two weeks of hanging out and like he would be in his computer sometimes and like do emails and stuff but i wasn't thinking that he would stream like 12 hours a day and it was pretty like it was pretty intense like in the beginning of it as well and i realized it was really hard to like get attention and get time because his like love meter would be like full if all is just in the house and that's just kind of like the way he is and for me back then when i didn't have anything else to do um was kind of like a it was kind of crazy uh for me i feel like right now because i do work as well and i have things going from for me and i have other friends uh now that i made i feel like it's a lot easier because and and i can definitely like enjoy just like being in separate rooms and just like hear him in the background is really nice so i can like i can sit and paint in like in my room and i will do that for hours while i'm just like hearing a scream in the background it's kind of like comforting that he's he's just there and it feels nice i like it because to you that's the sound of happiness of yes because i know he's right there yeah it's nice and they will come in and check on me sometimes and it's it's kind of like it's actually very comforting it's very nice i like it yeah i think that's kind of what a relationship is like you do fun things together you know you share moments together but also just like having someone like around you is really really nice uh and i think that's probably maybe it's me growing up maybe that's what it is and like i start liking like the kind of i feel like we're like an old couple like we're like 80 and we're just like around we don't really have to talk much it's it's nice to just do that and that fills your love meter that um i like this terminology love me i need both i mean okay you met you're making it sound like that i'm like craving like i haven't said anything i'm not saying anything i never said a single thing at all i know exactly we're thinking so there's so much judging going on there's no judging um no but like we i think i think whenever we do plan something out like if we if we go on a trip like every other month or once a month i feel like usually like that's enough as long as he's not playing factorial the

Streamer'S Private Life

Nim's private life (04:12:30)

entire time like if if i feel like he's going on these trips with me and he's not like doing things with me or he's not he's not interested in like spending time or like being present with me then i feel like i just feel like i'm just wasting time right now and then i get kind of disappointed but otherwise i i think this like this is fun i think this is like spending time together because we're like doing something together yeah it's nice it's fun yeah my my love meter is you're loving it it's cool it's my social life otherwise we like to we like think about it that way that like i need like a little bit more of like this one thing like quality time and he needs like almost zero quality time but like let's say that i we took away like physical touch you would probably not be very happy um so you need physical touch so it's not just back to me huh no i'm a very kelly person yeah like kelly and then you're like i guess like acts of service like if i do something for you you get really happy like hot chocolate yeah like if i give him hot chocolate in the morning he gets really happy so the actual it's not the hot chocolate it's the giving of the hot chocolate no it's just the hot chocolate but if she gives it to me it's i didn't have to get it myself maybe just physical touch it like that's really nice all right well if you have to choose between factoria and the drama or political discourse we probably political discourse probably my calling but i am a good factorial player like what role exactly does factorial play in your streaming life oh well right now it's just usually there are like these games that i play in the background as i have conversation because it's hard for me to just sit on the computer just talk and not like be playing again at the same time so it's just something that came in kind of like occupied you know i was gonna be able to buy like little like widget things i guess yeah that's what yours yeah basically yeah it's like minecraft or effectorial for me all right well my love meter is full from this well thank you so much for joining us this is really fun you guys are fascinating human beings um thank you for existing i'm glad to live in a world where you exist i can't wait to see what kind of beautiful uh thing you create next and the crazy kind of art that you create through the different people you interact with destiny steven you're an amazing human thank you so much for talking to me it's an honor hope to talk with you again talking about Shapiro you've given me a lot of inspiration it's an honor to talk to the bench Shapiro of the left yeah well thanks a lot for my i appreciate it thank you thanks thank you thanks for listening to this conversation with destiny to support the podcast please check out our sponsors in the description and now let me leave you with some words from luis carol it's no use going back to yesterday because i was a different person then thank you for listening and hope to see you next time you

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