Episode 190: You Don't Like Me? Really?? | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Episode 190: You Don't Like Me? Really??".


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Intro (00:00)

I'm I'm Ryan Naidel, who is the I'm Ryan Naidel, who's the I'm Ryan Naidel who's 15 minutes of freedom, your daily action guide to getting shit done. Today's episode's entitled, You don't Like Me? Really? Sit back, relax, and enjoy the content.

Discussion On Popularity, Feedback And Authenticity

You dont like me (00:26)

So in today's episode, I'm going to cover with you the perspective change of stopping giving a shit what somebody thinks about you, and how liberating it actually becomes. So it might surprise you as you're listening. I'm being facetious. There's a lot of people that don't like what I have to say. And that used to really, really upset me. Like I remember distinctly going through the reviews inside of iTunes, that's actually what sparked this. It triggered me. But I would remember when I first launched the podcast, I was going through the reviews inside of iTunes that's actually what sparked this it triggered me but I would remember when I first launched the podcast was going through seeing reviews and like super excited like I'm at five or six hundred reviews and you were listening and you're in my opinion if you're listening and I'm ranking well in the charts you have to be somewhat enjoying it and certainly this, I knew some back-end tips and tricks as to how to make sure that iTunes ranked you higher. So we utilize those as a marketing company to propel our rankings. I'm not ashamed of that. Shoot, admittedly, I have a course that's coming out that's going to show you if you're interested and how to launch your own podcast, to go from someone like I am, or was an obscure guy in the Midwest with just a story to tell and some truth to get out and how to take that and turn that into a message that gets you the ability to book people like a Lewis House on your show or you know different influencers and not only that how to actually catapult yourself into the public eye and actually make money with the podcasting. So yes a little bit of a plug for things I can't even call that it it shameless. But nonetheless, I remember going through these reviews and seeing the first couple that were negative. Like it's five star, five star, and I'm like scrolling, I'm almost pounding my chest. Like it's the validation I've been searching for for so long.

Adulation (02:14)

And I don't care what anybody tells you at some level, we all are seeking a certain level of acceptance. To me all are seeking a certain I am completely self- assured right now, but it makes me feel good to get adulation and feedback back from a marketplace when I'm not asking for it. See I realize the fact that in consuming this podcast you have to actively seek it out. I can't make you listen to this. There's nothing that I know how to do to force you to consume this content. So you think of traditional radio and on traditional radio you could be driving in your car and be forced to listen to songs you don't want, forced to hear commercials you don't care about, forced to hear DJ's that you don't like the sound of their voice. Podcasting is so different to me. Because you seek out new podcasts and new stimuli and some of it inevitably you enjoy and some of it you're like yeah that was just okay or some of it you adamantly despise. But in my mind in the way that my mind works I never went out and consumed content that I didn't like. See I was pretty quick to make a judgment, make an assessment. If I didn't like something I stopped listening to it, I deleted the, like I subscribed everything up front, so I would subscribe and then start to listen and if I didn't like if I didn't like, if I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, I didn't like, it, I didn't

Hey Maps.com (03:28)

like, I didn't like, I didn't like, it, I didn't like, I didn't like if I didn't like something I stopped listening to it I deleted the like I subscribed to everything up front so I would subscribe and then start to listen and if I didn't like it I'd delete it no big deal nothing ventured nothing gained in my opinion again this podcast as far as I know right now for those of you listening through iTunes I know it's 100% free. Not only is it free but I'm also not monetizing it so you don't get convoluted with advertisements and plugs for different products and services. So in that, as I'm scrolling through these reviews, and I start to see people that just don't like what I have to say. Well, the first ones I remember seeing was a woman that was mad that this was so male dominated. And I've recorded different episodes before that that triggered me that made me upset. I'm like, I best I know, I mean I just used a restroom a couple minutes ago, I'm a man. As of right now I still have male genitalia by the nature of that I don't know what it's like to be a woman I'm never going to know. I can't really cater my message to my audience as my message is just mine.

Chauvinism (04:26)

And more specifically, I have an episode coming out that's your message, your message. Like it's actually what I'm sharing are all the stories of my life, all the dumb decisions I've made, the things that go on day over day that help determine where I'm going in the future. And so I saw that I was triggered by it. me upset, but you know got past that pretty quick. Then there's a series more of just positive reviews, which is great. Eventually, I get bombarded with two, three, four in a row of just one star negative reviews. And these are everything from chauvinism to using too much vulgarity to why would anybody want to listen to this guy? Like man, if that one started to sting a little bit, that last one like why would anybody want to listen to this guy? Then of course I'm able to reframe a situation and able to put a spin on it and say, well this is a choice. You have a choice just turn it off. If you want to attack me, bring it on. If you want to say you don't like my content, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then you don't my content, then, then, then, then you don't my content, then, then, then you don't my content, then you don't my content, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, then, have a choice, just turn it off. If you want to attack me, bring it on. If you want to say you don't like my content, then say you don't like my content. Sure, negative reviews hurt the ranking at iTunes. Oh well. Positive reviews eventually will outweigh those. With the 1,500 or 1,500 reviews I have so far, after 180 days of content, I can't wait to see what it's like after 1460 because a message that I'm putting forth and the energy that I put into this is coming from a place of genuine care and value. Then I'm gonna fast forward all the way to this weekend as I'm recording this is Monday, midday.

Dont remind Mark of his reading Reviews (05:54)

I can't help myself every once in a while. I'm sitting in the quietness of my own house and I start scrolling. I start scrolling on the reviews of my own podcast. I don't know if others that have podcasts do this or if it's just me waiting to consistently beat my head against the wall, but I do it nonetheless. And so I scroll and scroll and scroll because now there's a bunch of reviews and a bunch of great stuff to read. and I get to read. And I get to the very bottom. And the last review that I read is, it sounds like in 15 minutes, this guy has figured out how to game the iTunes system. Then he puts, and maybe it's a woman, 10, 13, 18, like the date that he leaves his comment. I'm going to say a tea because it's easier for me. And I'm sitting there, like, man, it's a shame on iTunes, you can't respond to these people. And sure, there would be some heated discussions, I'm through, there would be some battles back and forth. But now at this point I'm protective of what I've built. You know here I am every day taking time out of what I would call as a busy schedule to do things to add value to the world and also admittedly to build my personal brand. But none of these stories are fictitious. And in the course I have coming out no different than I'll tell you right now no different than I'll tell you on a webinar or through an email sequence or however I get it to you, there's a specific way to handle iTunes and the boxes you have to check in the order you have to check them. If that means that I'm playing a game that is inappropriate, then I stand caught red-handed. Because the games that get played here are not really games. I always equate things to driving. I love cars. I live in Columbus, Ohio. If I wanted to drive to Miami, Florida, I would be able to do so. No different than you. Right, but in our journey, there's different roads we can take. Literally right now, if I went to MapQuest and many younger listeners might not know what MapQuest is, it's crazy. We've all had maps on our phones, but some of us geriatric listeners used to have to go to a browser at your home computer, go to something called MapQuest. Type in where you wanted to go and then print off directions to take with you in the car. And during the days of map quest you would literally, they'd ask you, do you want the quickest round, the route with the fewest tolls, the most scenic route? How do you want to get to your final destination? And it would show you on this virtual map, like three or four different paths you could choose. I would always choose the quickest route. I would always choose the quickest route. I would always choose the quickest route. I never cared if the route cost more money. I didn't care if I missed some scenic landmarks. All I cared about was that I got to where I wanted to get to the quickest. There is no difference in this podcasting world. If I can't five-star reviews and five-star written reviews and people download the episodes sequentially nearest to the time I launch them and I have consistent daily content and I have on page SEO and I have good clear audio. Am I listen through percentages above 95% on every episode? iTunes likes me better. It's just that simple. iTunes will like you better. If you want to launch a podcast, I'm literally going to hand you the playbook. I think everybody should have a podcast. I know you listening right now, you have a story to tell. You have a tribe that is waiting for someone to follow. You have things that you've carried around bottled up inside of you that you want to get off your chest. They might not be as significant as mine and significance again as a is a witness test that doesn't need to be had. Just because I have lied, cheated, bankrupt like done steroids name all these things that mess is my message it doesn't have to be yours you could have went through all those same things and elected not to share all of them but still have things you want to get out To me, podcasting is this early adoption thing, like when Lewis How sat in this office, better part of two weeks ago, and told me that he'd been podcasting for six years, I lost it, like I didn't even know you could podcast six years ago. I didn't know that was a thing. And here I am thinking I'm a hot shop because I've won 180 days in a row. This man's got a six-year head start on me. No shit he's interviewing Kobe Bryant. He should. But admittedly the way I look at the world now, if I've got all this run rate and I know all the mathematics behind the scenes and if I'm hell-bent I'm putting out quality content day over day, what do you think is going to happen for me in six years if I do this consistently? There's a point in every journey that we all stop. Every one of us, something goes on and we stop, we lose motivation. We just don't keep going forward. And admittedly I have those days when it comes to this podcast. But I'll give you another inside secret. We figure out a workaround. And admittedly I have those days when it comes to this podcast. But I'll give you another inside secret. We figured out a work around. I'm going to share something with you that you're going to be able to use against me. I release or we release as a company one podcast a day. There are many days where I record zero podcasts. There are many more days where I record zero podcasts. Then there are many more days where I record three, four, five, six at a time because I have inspiration and notes on my phone and I sit down and Kurt comes in the office with the iPad and we bounce back and forth between two cameras so I can get better looking at two focal points for when I'm speaking from stage. Yes, I'm putting in reps now for something that does not currently happen all the time.

Hes recording Jeff (12:05)

Because I know how I do one thing here is how I'll do everything and if I put the time, energy, and effort into my success today, when it's time to perform, I'll be ready. No different than recording episodes to keeping them in the bank. I get internally nervous if we don't have two weeks of content, pre-recorded, pre-shot, and loaded up to syndicate out to the world. Why do I get nervous? Not only because of the commitment I put forth to you, but also because iTunes cares if you change your format. It's not an accident that someone like Louis House launches an episode Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday. That is not by chance. That is not because those are his four favorite days of the week. It's because frequency of messaging and new content matters. And so I understand the fact now as I'm sitting behind this microphone, there's a lot of people that just don't like what I have to say. Thank you. I'm okay being this microphone. There's a lot of people that just don't like what I have to say. Thank you. I'm okay being somewhat polarizing. I'm okay with it because at this moment in time everything I'm sharing is not based off of a desired outcome of polarity. It's based off of owning my fucking truth. If you think this podcast is a fluke, go over to one of my social media handles.

Abridged Version of Rogue Intro (13:26)

Go over to Instagram. It's when I post on the most often. The vernacular that I use, the images that I post, the calls to action that I have, the messaging behind things, it's the same as the show. Why is it the same as a show? Because I'm not trying to be someone that I'm not. In the day of social media and being a quote-unquote influencer, in the day of having eyeballs matter, it's very difficult to not do things for viral content. A friend of mine, actually a guest that's on the show that his episode will come out at some point in the near future. Vincent Vargas, a guy goes by the name of Rocco, a guy that's on Mayans Motorcycle Club, you can catch on FX. Crazy ass guy, Army Ranger, Border Patrol, awesome guy. He's mentioned to me this morning at the gym. He lives out in Salt Lake City, so he's a couple hours before. We are in timetable here on the East Coast. And I'm going to leave names out of it because I can get a little tacky, but he's like, hey man, do you, he sends me a picture of Garrett Jay, White, founder of Wake Up Warrior, his Instagram page, is like, hey, bro, you know this guy? Yeah, I know, I'm it's Garrett. Found or wake up Warrior. Why, what's up? He messaged me back and forth. He said, well, so and so is picking at him, you know, trying to get a rile out of him. I just didn't know if he was a good guy or bad guy. he's polarizing his own nature. You want to know where Garrett sits on any topic, just ask him. He doesn't have the biggest social media following because right now he's not trying to produce viral content, he's producing content that is real for who he is and where he is in his evolution. Garrett does not have a long-flowing beard. Garrett does not fly an American flag behind his avantador as he's driving around Orange County. Garrett cusses too much and tells the same stories. But in this moment he feels very true and authentic to exactly who he is and exactly where he's going. All this becomes relevant because it's difficult in today's day and age to not do that. Like podcasting is way easier if I make up a bunch of shit and tell a bunch of stories that aren't true that get you to share them with other people, the crazy stuff. Like if I paint these vivid imagery stories of things that didn't actually happen in their truest capacity more people will listen. The path that I'm on currently is not the quick path. It's a long game. Can I sit behind this microphone and call out a bunch of people for things that I see that I don't agree with, knowing that I'll eventually get to them, knowing that I can can pick back and forth of them, knowing that that will help get me more social credit and digital equity? Sure. There's plenty of other people in the marketplace doing that. Maybe not through podcast, maybe somewhat through podcast, but certainly through social media.

Choose Polarizing (16:36)

What I've taken is this other path. That's a path of just being who I am. That's a path of I've tried the quick route. I've tried to game every system. When I say game every system, like pay to cheat the system. Like I don't look at knowing how iTunes works and then utilizing their algorithm to benefit the ranking that I get. I don't look at that as gaming the system. I look at that as following the map from here to Florida to Miami on the quickest route. That was always the case for me. I would just figure out how to pay or cheat and get my way there. But times are different and it's a long road, this is a long game for me. And if I beat my own drum and honor my own voice and don't try to be someone that I'm not.

Authentic (17:27)

Some of you listening enjoy what I have to say. Some of you listen, inevitably waiting for the next salacious thing to run your mouth and tell someone else, instead of bringing it to me directly. And some are you just waiting for the train wreck to happen? And I honor all of you for being a part of it. What I find the most unique is the fact that you have the same pieces and parts going on in your life now. You're just choosing to not put them out there. I decided to push this authentic vulnerability. I was a term that a guy named Luther Ott came up with. Stuck with me ever since. I'm okay being my authentic self knowing that there's a vulnerability behind it. Knowing the fact that it's polarizing, knowing the fact that some people just don't think that I could ever change or that this is monotonous and tiresome. But think about your own life right now. You, right now. You, right now. Think of all the places where you're concerned if people like you or not, instead of just being the best version of you. It used to be this horrible pair of handcuffs and blinders that I had to wear every day, was worrying about what in the fuck other people thought, and having that be the true witness test for everyers that I had to wear every day was worrying about what in the fuck other people thought and having that be the true litness test for every decision that I made. Does it sting when I get a negative review and somebody attacks me? Yeah a little bit. We all have an ego. And if it says they don't again I'm going to tell you he was lying. But doesn't sting me to the point that it cripples me, it's just like, man, I wish I could get through and talk to this guy or woman. Like what could I do to add better content? How could I get him to him or her to go from being someone that is a hater on this? I hate that term, but someone that just doesn't like the content, and someone that can support it. What went so wrong in their life that they feel the need to attack me versus just unfollowing or unlistening. Why don't they send me an email and let me know what I could do better? I've never, any time someone's giving me negative feedback, I'm not sharing this individual's name, not sharing his handle. I don't need people to go out and attack him or her. Same thing with emails. There's a lesson we learned from everything. I said this lesson of gaming, the iTunes system. Sure, I'm going to teach you how to do it too. By the time this episode launches, certainly there will be a link on my link tree on Instagram to buy a course. Yes, I'm sorry, you're going to have to buy it. This information can make you literally hundreds of thousands of dollars. So I'm going to charge you for all of my research and how I went from nobody to iTunes top 20 consistently. I'm going to give it all to you. And it's going to cost money. Because I found over and over again if you don't pay for things, if you get it for free, you put that amount of value in it, which is nothing. In order to have value in something, you have to energetically change money for goods or services. And to me, in hosting a podcast, and then never monetizing in any way that would be inappropriate, some of you also want to have a podcast, and I'm going to show you how to do it. No holds bars all the way in from the right way to come up with a title and a name to the right image size to how to syndicate it to then how to get picked up on a syndication network to how to monetize it, to how to book guess, to how to come up with impactful pauses to the time of episodes and the length of episodes and the SEO on page like name something. I want you to I want you to be right next to me. I want you to climb the ranks and have me on your show. I want to have you on my show.

It Can Be Tiring (21:33)

Like that's what this stuff's all about to me. Instead of being too chicken shit that if you don't like, if you don't like somebody just to bring it to their face. I'm good if you don't like me. Help me grow from it. I'm willing to listen. But think about your own life, once again, where in your life now are there areas for opportunity where you're too worried about what other people think? That that fear of judgment and the lack of clarity is crippling your growth as an individual. Could have been the gym, could have been with the way that you're currently training or not training, that your tribe, the people that you hang out with, the people that you associate with, all think and operate one way. And so you've adopted those same principles and mindsets. Even though you know it's ultimately not what you desire.

Haunt You (22:27)

My example, this was anabolic. I knew for a long time I didn't want to be a professional bodybuilder, but I hung out with guys that were meatheads and all they want to do is compete. All they want to do is talk about how we're going to shred a glutes, strided glutes. Who's going to win the next show? And so that was how I was living and operating. Same thing, maybe it's a relationship side of things. Maybe you're hanging out with people or associating with people that don't put value on an intimate one-on-one monogamous relationship. Yes, monogamy. It's a term that I might have been you on an intimate one-on-one monogamous relationship. Yes, monogamy. It's a term that I might have been able to give you the definition of, but I certainly didn't live it for a long time. But this monogamous relationship that you seek that you ultimately know will fulfill you more than anything else, you cast aside because the people that you associate with are all amplifying the fact that that's not quote unquote what you're supposed to do.

One On One Relationships

One on One Relationship (23:14)

They're going out and picking up different chicks or guys having multiple different fishes on the line or fish. I don't think fish, I think it's just fish. I don't think plural is fishes. Multiple fish on the line. English has not been my thing. I'm having a podcast. But that you believe that that's what you have to do. Maybe the thing where you're so worried about judgment and that fear of loss is inside the professional world that you're living in. I mean are you worried right now about what others will say, what your parents will say if you leave your job and go chase your dream of doing whatever that is? It's truly incredible as I go deeper and deeper down the what I'll call performance coaching route, not only for myself but for the clients that I have, we all are surrounded by the same limiting beliefs of the tribe that we've associated with. If I have the dream and the belief system inside of me tribe that we've associated with. If I have the dream and the belief system inside of me that I want to be a fighter pilot, but everybody around me tells me that it's crazy. Eventually I adopt that mindset and I stop my own dreams. When I finally stopped stopping my dreams and started chasing exactly what I want to do every day, I was able to get shit done. You're going to.

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