Episode 219: Monday Motivation | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Episode 219: Monday Motivation".


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Intro (00:00)

This is 15 Minutes of Freedom. I'm your host, Ryan Idell, and today's episode is Monday Motivation. In today's episode, I'm going to cover a listener-requested topic on how to stay motivated. This is an interesting question. So, a listener named Adam reached out to me this morning. Oddly enough, today is a Monday. And Adam shared with me that as he goes about his life and crushes his goals, as the week continues on, he eventually loses some motivation. Now, in this email, which is very well written, he goes into some more detail, which is not necessarily important for our conversation. But what is important is he said he assumes that I must feel the same way and he asked for tips to get through it. Now, I love that. I'm incredibly flattered, humbled, honored that I would be thought of in such a light that I could give information about this topic. But in saying that, my information is not going to be all that pleasant. You see, I have found out throughout my entire life that if something wasn't important enough to me, I would just fucking do it.

Understanding And Finding Motivation

How to stay motivated (01:28)

Like there's all these, like, how do you stay motivated, the motivational memes, the inspirational podcasts, all this stuff. And I love it all, right? I mean, this podcast, as you're listening, might provide some light and some enlightenment into a dark part of your life, into a part where you're struggling. Admittedly, that's part of what this podcast is all about. But there's not necessarily a tip or a trick or a hack to increase motivation. You see, when I was in the car dealership world, that part of life, I was extremely motivated by money. So were there times in my life when I would wake up and say, fuck, I don't want to go to work today. Yeah, of course. Absolutely. Were there times where I can remember it was easier to press the snooze button? You know it. No question. But the motivation of my financial success outweighed all the other things that were slowing down my motivation, and so I got up and went to work. And okay, you're saying like, yeah, of course, that's great, right? That's what people do. You get up and go to work. I agree. I agree with you as you might be saying that. But in that same conversation, there was a choice to work five days a week, six days a week, seven days a week. There were a choice to work how many hours each day. And my motivation, even on the days where I lacked what would have been external motivation, my motivation for success was still greater than every other thing that was pulling at me. And so I got up and I went to work. And so I got up and I went to work and even on the days I was slow, I focused on what mattered. And in that, I remember the very first manager that I had, the very first one I can remember, only partial truth, the second manager I can remember, his name was Tim Mowry. So I had Dave Steinberger, I had Tim Mowry, and I had Jeremy Yeager were my three sales managers. And I was a student of the car game. Like I wanted to learn everything about sales. I wanted to learn everything I possibly could. I wanted to be the best. And I remember sitting down and saying like, just teach me. I'll do anything. And one of the very first exercises that Tim Mowry had me do was to type up what I wanted to achieve in a year, which is crazy as I sit here. I haven't thought about this since that moment. And I remember typing I wanted to have $20,000 in liquidity. I wanted to have $20,000. I could always write a check for $20,000. I remember writing that I wanted to be able to pay cash for an R1 motorcycle. I remember that I wanted to have, gosh, be either salesperson of the year or outpace everybody in sales. There was one or two other goals. And they were literally typed on just a Word document. And I printed it out and he had me tape it right in front of where the phone was at, which was on the corner of my desk facing the window, facing out. And see, Tim sat down and explained to me that if I saw this all the time and I focused on it, every time that phone was there and I wasn't with a customer, that phone better be in my hand or I wasn't going to be able to get what I wanted. And I would love to say that worked, and maybe it did somewhere subconsciously. I certainly don't think the way I do now, based off what I was doing back then, I mean now I get it, right? I visualize things, I journal things, I write everything down possible, I track and monitor almost every aspect of my life. But back then, it was just something I was doing to appease him because he said if I did it, I could become more successful. And that's all that mattered, right? That was my motivation. Success was my motivation. And so great. That worked until it didn't work anymore.

The motive that was missing (05:39)

You see, my motivation for success there, when I felt as though I had capped out my success and I couldn't obtain a higher level, I sought external stimulation. I came down to Columbus. I found another job. I started over again. Maybe much like yourself, right? You start something with motivation. You start with incredible vigor. And then as times continue on, you justify the reason as to why you're no longer as motivated. In full transparency, I could have stayed in Mansfield and still ascended higher ranks of that dealership. I was at best a sales manager of a third of a store that I could have spent time, energy, and effort and became the general manager over a long enough period of time. But I wanted the quick route. I wanted more success. I wanted a bigger city. And so I moved to Columbus. I found the job. I checked the boxes. I did the things. How many places in your life are you just checking boxes right now? I feel like that was almost my entire 20s. You see, what I realized is the motivation that I was searching for that was external was never going to ultimately be fulfilled. When I came to Crown Mercedes here in Columbus, Ohio, actually Dublin to be specific, I had to get hired in as a salesperson. Now, here I was, sales manager of a store, and had to take multiple steps backwards in an effort to take steps forward. Great. Who cares, right? I can almost hear you saying it to me right now. What becomes relevant because it gave me a new thing to shoot for, it gave me a new thing to strive for, it gave me more motivation that was external. The motivation for me external was the fact of I needed to recline the ladder and prove my worth to people around me and become a sales manager. Now I needed a Rolex because I was in Columbus at a Mercedes-Benz store and everybody had Rolexes. And having a demo wasn't enough. I needed to own my own Mercedes-Benz. Living in a condo wasn't good enough. I needed a house and a rental property. That would solve it all, right? That was my new motivation. And so I worked and worked and worked and probably manipulated and maneuvered around and justified my positions and my stances until I had all those things plus some.

My external motivations (07:52)

And crazy thing happens once I achieved all those. My motivation was gone. once I achieved all those, my motivation was gone. Because motivation that I had concocted was based off an external stimulus. It wasn't internal. It was based off the accumulation of things and positions. But yet at this point, it still didn't click to me, right? Like here I am, mid twenties, feeling like I'm top of the world. Making more money than I knew what to do with. Fancy cars, watches, stuff. And it's laughable now, but at the time, that was all of it. That was the motivation. Not to mention, we can sprinkle in women. I mean, of course, that was a motivation too. Then I get an opportunity to go across the street, and I'm now reinvigorated and re-motivated by the opportunity to be the general manager of the largest collection of European brands under one roof. Yes, I will have finally made it. I will work my way up through the ranks and I will become the general manager of the store. Well, when the time came and I got passed up for that promotion, what do you think happened to my motivation? It plummeted. It was non-existent. And of course, there were things back and forth between myself and the owner of that store that made it so I didn't want to work there any longer. I didn't want to work there because the external motivation, external stimulation that I was seeking was never going to be really validated. It was never going to come. And so instead of putting in the work, my motivation decreased and I left. And we can bounce all the way through, right? I can take you through the same thing in the hosting world. My motivation was now private planes. My motivation was all types of crazy stuff for different people. My motivation was proving that I was better than I was. All of these things were external motivations. And so as I sit here sharing this with you, for the very first time in my life, my motivations are no longer external, they're internal. And I get it, you might be asking, well, what does that mean? How do you have an internal motivation versus external? podcast with two water stains on the tile ceiling, a $200 green couch that I got from, I think, Facebook Marketplace that was supposed to be blue and I unboxed and it was green and I'm like, I'm not doing anything with it. It was cheap. It's a seat. I'm recording with cameras that are old iPhones and iPads. Little of the lights that backlight this office, I also got off Facebook Marketplace for $100. And I get it right now. Why does any of this matter? Well, finally, for the first time in my life, the motivation that I have is not externally based. I'm not doing all this because I want better lights. I'm not doing it because I need a different office. I'm not doing it because I want better cameras. I'm not doing it because I want a leather couch. I'm doing it because it matters to me. My motivation is to make an impact in the world that is greater than money. Now, as you're listening, I would assume a handful of you, maybe you yourself are questioning, like, how is that even possible? Well, I'll tell you it's not because I'm a multimillionaire, because I'm certainly not.

How do I find motivation (11:38)

But I have all my needs met and I get to make a change in the world. And the change in the world becomes the motivation. Now, this is certainly not to say I still don't want private jets. I would be lying to say I don't. I hate flying commercial. I don't want to go to the fucking airport. I want to be able to show up when I want to, spoiled, selfishly, hop on a plane when it's convenient, bring a bunch of people with me, and go anywhere I want to. That matters. But it doesn't matter because of external stimulus. I'm not worried about that if you approve of it. I'm not doing it so I can post a picture on Instagram so I can get a like from you. I'm doing it because of ease. I'm doing it because I want my family with me. My family not only being Gianna and Lindsay, but the external family of people that I associate with. Move all that to the side for a second. I start really focusing on the base of this question. As a week continues on, how do you find motivation? Monday, I wake up and crush it. Tuesday, it gets a little bit worse. Wednesday, I can feel myself sliding. Thursday, I'm holding on for dear life. And Friday, if I'm lucky, I coast into the weekend. How do I change that? You find a different reason to do your shit. I would love to say there's some magic hack to this, right? There's just simply not. I have done things for external factors. I have done it because I thought motivation was attached to financial gain. I've done it because I thought it was attached to things, right? Like a car outside or a different office or different cameras or different lights. And I'm saying all that because I'm looking around this office realizing that none of this shit matters. When all this waters down and my final card gets punched, are you going to remember the Rolls Royce I had outside? Are you going to remember the way I made you feel? And more importantly, are you going to remember how often I made you feel that way. Are you going to remember the commitment that I made to me and through myself to you to provide value every day no matter what the fuck mattered to me during that time period in life? I need to think about this for a second.

My motivation (13:58)

a second. I'm getting asked the question of what motivates me when I have been recording this podcast as my best friend dies, as business takes its ups and downs, as my wife gets sick, as I've fought with her ex-husband. There's all these things, right? A bunch of reasons to slow down. I'm definitely over 210 episodes at this point of daily content. What's crazy is I'm definitely over 210 episodes at this point of daily content. What's crazy is I'm not even a seventh of the way to the finish line. Like if this was football, what would I be on the 14-yard line? Give or take 15?

That motivation you need (14:38)

My own 14 or 15-yard line? Like I'm nowhere even close to where I need to get to. But the motivation that I have is greater than what you think of me. It's greater than the paycheck I get. It's greater than all the bullshit stories I can tell myself. There are plenty of days where I don't want to do this. It's funny. Kurt is sitting on this lovely green couch, almost nodding his head of the number of times I say, shit, I just, we got to record more content today. I don't have any time energy. I don't want to do this. So what do you think I do? I come in here and I record content because I committed to it. And the motivation to myself trumps the motivation for everything else. I still, as of right now, don't monetize this podcast. This is not about money. It's about impact. And the whole thing of what's your why, your why does eventually have to matter, but your why can't be external. And so this individual that was sharing with me, Adam, he's talking about living the warrior's way. The warrior's way is Garrett J. White's brainchild of Wake Up Warrior. He's part of King's Kit, which is thekingskit.com, something you should check out, explore, get some more information on it. Wake Up Warrior certainly made a massive impact and changed my life from where I sit now. But he's sharing that he knocks out things called the core four. So he focuses on his body being in balance and business and does something called a stack, as I've shared in past episodes. He does that every day, but he struggles towards the end. Adam, as I know you're listening to this, you're struggling because you don't give a shit as to why you're actually doing it. You're doing it because someone told you, not because you found the gift in it. Anytime you do something for someone else, it doesn't fucking matter. It just doesn't. Your hierarchy is backwards. Doing it because someone inside of Wake Up Warrior told you to do it, that's why at the end of the week it doesn't matter. Because you're not as driven for it.

The Role Of Attaching Outcomes

Attach an outcome to your reality (16:51)

Because you haven't attached why you're doing things to the desired outcome. So when we talk about the stack, which is something that I've shared and something that I've emailed to many of you, and I probably still owe several of you a stack, so if you want one, email me. Ryan at gsdmediagroup.com. I will gladly send you a stack so you know what I'm talking about. But you realize a stack isn't a thing of checking 30 boxes to say, okay, I did it, I'm good now. thing of checking 30 boxes to say, okay, I did it. I'm good now. The stack is designed to reframe how you feel about something, that everything that bothers us makes us sad or frustrates us in life. We have ultimately done to someone else, which is why it makes us so mad. Then we get to decide if it makes you that mad and you realize that you've done to somebody else, what do you actually want to have happen out of the situation and then how are you not going to do it to other people in the future? Then on the backside of that, there's a gift that comes, right? Because once you release the rage and you yell and you get mad about the things that piss you off, there's nothing left. And if you're quiet, there's a gift that comes. There are psychological triggers as to why all these things work. They're just not explained in depth. So you do it because you check boxes. And at the end of the week, when you're tired, when you're frustrated, when the days have been long, the boxes are harder to check. Your pen gets less filled with ink. I get it. What happens when you realize why you're doing the shit that you do? Then the pen never runs out of ink. Then it's always there. You don't think I have 32, 33, 34 hours of clients every week, whatever I have now, can't even count that high. There are plenty of times when I'm recording this at 615 on a Monday, I'm out. It's crazy, right? I'm saying this to you that as I'm recording this I would rather be at home with my wife we don't have Gianna tonight it's time for just her and I but my motivation doesn't allow me to call it quits so all these stories that run around in your head it all boils down to understanding why you do what you do and then figuring out if it actually serves you or if you're doing it to serve somebody else. Because if you are doing things because you think it matters to other people and you haven't tied it to something that matters for you, there will come a day where you stop doing it.

Application To New Experiences

Tying it to something new (18:59)

Every time. So I can attach this to the body quadrant of things, right? I can say, where in your life right now as it pertains to body are you not showing up the right way? Are you not as consistent or not as motivated at the end of the week to go to the gym? If so, I would say you're either not getting enough rest, not getting enough recuperation, or don't understand why you're actually working out. You're not seeing meaningful changes. But are you not seeing meaningful changes because you're not really doing the whole work? You're just checking a box? Same thing in a relationship. You want more sex, right? You want to be more intimate with your partner or find a partner to be intimate with. It's okay. We're human beings. We all have that need. But at the end of the day, you're just trying to check a box and do the right thing and play the right game to get the girl or the guy in bed. You don't even understand why you're doing it. Of course, eventually the motivation wears off and you get tired of the relationship. You haven't solved what you're doing it for. Same thing in business. If you think chasing money is going to get you to the finish line as far as it pertains to motivation, from my humble position, you are sadly mistaken. Motivation will wear out long before the money shows up that you actually desire. You have to start attaching motivation to the reason in which you want to be in business, which has to be something greater than financial rewards. Well, I can tell you, when you finally start to realize that your motivation comes from internal factors versus external, every day thereafter, you'll find out that you can get shit done.

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