Episode 239: And? | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Episode 239: And?".


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Intro (00:00)

This is 15 Minutes to Freedom. I'm your host, Ryan Neidell, and today's episode is and? In today's episode, I'm going to share with you a conversation I had with a longtime podcast listener about the choices you can make in life. So this whole podcast deal has been very, very interesting. I admittedly have not pushed all that hard to become a guest on other people's shows. I feel like I should probably start on that, right? Because it's a way to get new listeners, it's a way to get my story out more, it's a way to connect with more people, and it's really a way to meet some more phenomenal individuals. But I was fortunate enough early on during this podcast journey, before episode 100, early on during this podcast journey, before episode 100, to be invited onto a podcast based out of England. And the podcast was great. Hopped on Zoom, might have been even Skype, went back and forth, had a meaningful conversation. Now, this interview aired and got some good traction, and we covered everything from metaphysics to anabolic use to cheating to scaling and selling businesses. Like this real smorgasbord of what I could condense down in about an hour and 15 minutes. But as life has progressed and the world would have it, this individual has stayed in touch with me, right? I mean, that's the ultimate goal for me. Certainly to make an impact on 125 million people's lives, but it's also to make friends along the way. I have a standing rule now after a couple of guests on the show that if I can't be an actual friend of yours, if we can't have an actual meaningful conversation prior to being a guest on the show and really get to know each other, it's probably just not going to work out.

Discussion On Professional Life And Relationships

Interview (01:48)

It's probably just not a good fit because I'm not trying to leverage your social equity. Admittedly, when I started, that's what I was trying to do. I had a whole list of people. We had a whiteboard out in the middle of the office and it's like, let's come up with every name of every person that I can possibly interview that have the biggest following so I can use their following to help me get more listeners. Yeah, that's literally like a complete bunch of horseshit now that I say that out loud. But it was the game plan back then. I don't know that we reached out to more than 10 of those people. I don't know how many of those I even heard back from. Because it doesn't really work. You have to be able to add value. Not only do you have to add value, you have to be energetically aligned. You have to be on the same wavelength, I'll call it. Same frequency. And I happen to be with this podcaster, I'll call it, same frequency. And I happen to be with this podcaster, and I'm leaving his name anonymous right now, from England. And as his life takes its twists and turns, he was offered an opportunity to go travel abroad. He was taking some advanced learning, some college curriculum classes, and was offered, essentially would equate to a scholarship to go travel all over China for the better part of a year. It wasn't going to cost him anything. He got to go to university. He got to really experience a different side of life. And so the podcast was going to have to be basically put on the back burner that he was going to move from England to China. He has done that. That's where he is now. During that transition, as he's in China, he reaches out to me and says, hey, I really like what you have going on. I would love to potentially talk about being an intern for you when I get done. I'd love to come spend some time in the States. Man, at this point, I'm flattered.

Advise on Entering the Workforce (03:41)

Can you imagine yourself getting an email from somebody you spent an hour and a half with asking to uproot their lives from one side of the globe to the other to get to learn what it is that you do and how you do it? It was crazy. It was also crazy seeing 2019, July of 2019, maybe it was August of 2019, would be the first opportunity that there would be for us to potentially be face-to-face. I'm flattered by this. And of course, I would love for this individual to make it to the States and intern and have a paid position here, right? Don't even know what that would look like, but for someone that reaches out and has that sort of gumption and that sort of intellect, there's always a spot. But we've stayed in touch and I wake up this morning to a message. And this message, again, I'll paraphrase it, read something along the lines of, man, I'm traveling a lot, doing a lot of things, seeing a lot of places, but I miss working. What do you think if I were to stop potentially going to university and were just to jump back into the working world? What would you think? And I'm flabbergasted by this, right? This individual is a younger man in his early 20s. And here I am really one of my largest regrets, which is a unique thing to say out loud. But one of the largest regrets that I have is not traveling more at a younger age without responsibility. So I obviously love my wife and my daughter incredibly deeply, but there's certain confines that exist from having a wife and a daughter that you can't just pick up your stuff and just move somewhere. You can't just go travel. You can't on a whim, pack up a backpack and be gone for three weeks. It's something I heavily encourage you if you are under, I don't even care how old you are. If you don't have any kids and you don't have a wife and you could feasibly figure out how to travel overseas, especially if you live in the States, it's a whole, like it completely changes your perspective on what goes on everywhere else and how insignificant the problems are that you have on a day-to-day basis. It's interesting as I share that one of my good coaching clients is going through a transitional period in her life where she said if she could do anything she wanted to do in the entire world, she would train horses. And she would train them in, of all places, Spain. It was originally Italy. I said, well, there's a language barrier there. Do you know how to speak Italian? She said, of course not. She said, but I know how to speak Spanish. Maybe I can go to Spain. So I leaned into her and asked her to start reaching out to horse stables in Spain. And wouldn't you know that she was able to secure a job if she wanted in Spain training horses for six months. Now she's in her mid to late 20s and has the ability to do that if she so desires and who knows what she'll select, right? We're not at that point of her journey right now. But I show that because traveling and going and seeing some other part of the world and experiencing a different culture is something that you can never get back, right? If you don't take that, it becomes more and more difficult as the years pile up on one another. And so he has shared with me that he's thinking about giving this up. And I'm like, why? Why would you want to give this up? And his answer is he wants to give it up based off of going back to work because he just misses the zest of working. It's not even so much an income thing for him right now. It's just he misses the hustle and bustle, and he'll refer to it as the grind of working. And so I can't help myself and say, well, are you able to work?

Why can you not have and (07:15)

Like, why can't you work? And he explains that his visa for China is not a work-related visa. He can't get a job there. Logical, right? I didn't know that answer. So I asked the question. The next question was, what about a digital business? What about an e-commerce-based business? So, well, no, that would be okay. All right. So why does it have to be either or? Why do you think that you have to give up traveling, going to university, doing the things that you inherently love for something else that you love? Why can't you do them both? Why can't you have, instead of either or, why can't you have and? I go to university, I travel, and I started my own digital business. And he stops. He goes, well, I guess I could. There's no reason. I said, okay, well, if you could do anything and money wasn't an object, what would that greatest version of yourself, what would that person do? I said, man, I've always wanted to be a personal trainer. I've always wanted to help people mold their body and get dialed in their fitness and their health and their nutrition and all those things. Okay. Well, couldn't you do that while going to university, while traveling? Couldn't you take some online courses? Couldn't you expand your mental capacity to get you in a position that when you're done traveling, you have a higher skill set that makes you more desirable? The answer, of course, is yes. And from that place of yes, he starts to formulate a plan and saying, well, I can take this test when I get back in February or March, when I go back and get back to England, that is, for a break and I might be able to do things that way. And I said, well, that's also great, right? That's a step in the right direction. But what can we do today to start to have you feel fulfilled so a part of you is not dead? I said, is it possible for you to take additional online training that doesn't equate to necessarily what it is you're waiting to test on? I said, well, yeah, of course I can. So, okay. So as you're trying to come up with this massive life decision of whether you quit university and quit traveling and go back to work, all you're really needing is additional fulfillment where you feel like you're taking steps in a direction to put cash in your pocket. Well, yeah. And it dawns on me how often this actually happens right think about your life and how many different places you think you have to have one or the other because someone along the way has told you well you can't have everything you want i think that single line is the biggest crock of shit that exists in the world you not only can have everything you want, I believe you should have everything you want and you are destined to get everything you want if you work hard enough on it and become honest about what it is that you want and why you want it. This is not that complicated, right? So this man is overcomplicating what seems to be from the outside a very simple situation. And of course, as he progresses his conversation with me back and forth, he realizes that and we part ways for the day. I love getting to start my day and making an impact in somebody's life. It's crazy to me. Simply from a podcast and a connection. But that leads me to have to ask you, where is it in your life you're overcomplicating something that could be very simple? I think at this time of the year, we all start focusing on New Year's resolutions and how we want that new body for the new year. And there is a chance from the outside that you are spinning your wheels on what is the right gym to go to, who is the right trainer, what's the right nutrition plan. You're almost in the state of paralysis by analysis from trying to figure out all the variables that you might be able to maximize in a situation. I understand how that might make you seem like if you don't pick the right one, you're not going to get the results as quick. I've been to a couple of gyms before. I've dealt with a couple of trainers, had a couple of dieticians. None of them had made me sign a lifelong agreement that agrees that I would never go anywhere else at any other time. Any action you take, anyone is the right place to start and you can add to it. You can have a secondary trainer. It's not going to be the end of the world. Maybe same thing in your relationship.

Have the relationship (11:52)

You're considering all these things. What you can't have is the and that I used to have. You can't have this girl you're dating and that girl you're dating. That is not a good play. I've went down that path. But what you can is have the relationship that is mentally and emotionally stable and full of sexual passion and desire. That is an and that you deserve. You just have to simply step up and own it. And then same thing as we pivot over into the business world. And then same thing as we pivot over into the business world. You deserve to have a business that makes you happy, excited, and something that you're passionate about. It doesn't have to be either one. There's a client of mine that his family has told him for years for some reason that you are just supposed to be miserable in your job.

Perspective On Business Happiness

The key to business happiness (12:40)

Everybody hates their job. I'll tell you, that is just 100% not true. If it is everybody, then I break that mold because I don't hate anything that I do. So when you start to question why you're selecting one or the other, and you realize that you are capable and are supposed to have it all, are supposed to have it all, and you take action towards that, you'll find out that every day you get shit done. you

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