Episode 312 - Commitment | When You Want To Quit, Double Down And Go For It | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Episode 312 - Commitment | When You Want To Quit, Double Down And Go For It".


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Intro (00:00)

This is 15 Minutes of Freedom. I'm your host, Ryan Neidell, and today's episode is commitment. Today's episode is commitment. In today's episode, I'm going to share with you why when all of your being pushes you away from the commitment you made to yourself, that's when you should double down and go for it. So I sit here, recording this show, at now 7.56 on Friday night. I have my wife laying on the green couch in front of me as she's been here working all day as well. I have the incredible Kurt Nassipak in the studio, also who has been working all day. And here I sit. I sit here recording another show. I share all this because there's no fucking part of me that wants to record this episode. Tonight, Lindsay and I got the news that our daughter, her daughter, however you want to say it, my bonus daughter, stepdaughter, I don't give a shit what the title is. She's going to stay at her grandparents' house tonight, which means we have a night alone. During that same window of time, new friends of ours, Jordan and Aaron, asked us to meet them at a local new restaurant for dinner with a couple other people. And of course I committed. Ran it by my wife first. And I sit here after recording multiple episodes and having multiple coaching calls and multiple closing conversations and multiple things that go on today. And I don't want to do this. You see as I'm recording this, I'm also live in the studio. So if you listen to these shows and you'd like to see it live on Facebook, you can follow me. I'm Ryan Nidel, the business page. Every time it pops up, you'll see it. You can also head over to the Life Optimization Group. Type it into Facebook. We'll start to get better at sharing it there as well. But it's crazy. I say it's crazy because it's a commitment that I made to myself to go live five days a week. Admittedly, the Facebook algorithm does not give a shit. I get maybe 200 views if I'm lucky on one of these live podcasts. People currently aren't sharing them. People aren't commenting. People aren't messaging me that they love the quality of the content. I can literally stack up 30 reasons right now just to say, fuck all this and go home today. But I can't because of a commitment. You see, earlier this week, Kurt and I sat down and mapped out what I'll call a content strategy to get me to the backside of the events that I'm having in March. The man-only event is the 20th of March or the 24th. If you're interested, feel free to shoot me a message. We can have a conversation. I think I can make room for one more person. Might be two. Then the weekend afterwards, the 27th through the 31st is a female-only event. I have a few more spots left for that. I think I have four. But in mapping out a content strategy, you may not realize as you're consuming this, is I have to plan it out because of travel because of other commitments like during this event there's four straight days where there's no chance for me to have a podcast i know that might not sound like a lot to you but that means four other days of the week i have to record an extra show so i don't have to do that but then the videos that I need to create to make sure everything is in alignment for the lead up to that part of life, to those events, coupled with the additional training videos I want to shoot so I can pour in more value to my clients, require that we record a minimum of three videos a day. require that we record a minimum of three videos a day.

Summary Of Personal Commitment And Future Vision

Welcome to decision day sept 2022. (04:20)

I have to do that all the way until March 19th just to barely be adequate in content creation. That doesn't put me ahead. That doesn't buy me more leeway. That's like the minimum required to get me through March. And so I sit here late on a Friday and every part of me inside literally wants to say like, screw it. Kurt and I are already coming in tomorrow. We can just record some podcasts tomorrow. Nobody will know. I mean, think about all the times in your life where you made a commitment to yourself and then when no one was looking or you could justify it away, you decided to not do what you said you would do because you then convinced yourself you could get to it later. I'm sure it's happened in the gym. I'm sure it's happened in your relationship and I'm sure it's happened in your business because I cannot be alone here. I used to do this shit all the time. I still struggle with it from time to time. But really when I struggle with it, I'm struggling with my own self-worth. I'm not struggling with the commitment, right? Because when I tie my word even to myself, the words I speak to myself, to my own internal self-worth, the game changes. Just like it would change for you. You see, it's easy when it's just words. When it's, ah, well, it's no big deal because in my head, certainly we can come in and shoot three or four podcasts tomorrow. We can shoot six, eight, nine, ten, twelve videos tomorrow. We'll only work for four hours. We'll be home. Nobody cares. And admittedly, nobody does. You on Facebook aren't watching and you listen to this right now, you will not have received this content until the middle of March. I'm recording it in February. But I know the difference. And I know that it only takes one or two slips like that where all of a sudden my word, it doesn't have any more value to me. And if my word doesn't have value to me, how can I expect it to have value to you? value to you and if my word doesn't have value to you how can I expect you to then reciprocate my time and my value back I can't it all goes away it all goes away by just succumbing to what is easy. And what's easy is quite often, almost always, not what's right.

Two committed to her own standards. (07:11)

What's right is the fact that I honor what I said I would do. I'm sitting here recording a show deep into the night on a Friday, pushing back the time we'll go out to dinner with Aaron and Jordan, pushing back the fact that my wife and I don't get to spend the time together that we exactly want to in the way that we want to. Don't get me wrong. We love podcasting in here and laughing. And when you hear those episodes, you'll die. We talk about some of the craziest shit her and I have spoken about. It's ridiculous. We completely lost sight of where we're going. But all this comes down to a commitment level. Like when I'm committing to have 100 coaches that work with me inside of the life optimization group, that's a commitment I'm now making to myself that increases and validates what my feelings of self-worth are. what my feelings of self-worth are. Right, the man I need to become and grow into in order to have 100 coaches that I train, educate, mentor, help gain clients for, that's a different man than shows up today on this show.

Commitment And Our Future (08:06)

That's a man that I have to consistently grow into. That's a man that requires a different level of commitment than I'm currently able to see, but I have to start today acting and thinking like that man in order to actually meet him. No different than you. If the goals that you set and the ideas that you have don't scare you, I would say they're not big enough. If you can think from your current perspective and know exactly how to get to where you want to get to, the goals aren't big enough. And because the goals aren't big enough, then the level of commitment required won't be big enough to push you to be a better person. It's for those reasons as to why most of us stay stagnant for the majority of our lives. We get a job that pays the bills. We work hard enough to maybe get on the radar of our boss. We then slowly hope we are in the right position at the right time to get the raise. Maybe if we're really ballsy, we'll step out and try to interview somewhere else once or twice when it gets really dark for us. But there's no rapid path to expansion. There's no upward trajectory. We just assume that mediocrity is the way that we're supposed to be. And certainly I see it all the time in relationships. You get into a relationship with rose-colored glasses on that you assume that your partner is all these things. You want them to be these things, whatever these things are to you. And you continue to justify the way that they treat you because it's what you've grown accustomed to expecting. But if you could go back to the original version of yourself, the one that first met that partner, and you made a commitment to yourself to never allow the relationship to get worse than it was in that moment. The communication would always stay high. That intimacy would stay exactly where it's at, if not get better. That the connections you'd have would only flourish and grow. And that was the commitment that you honored to yourself. You wouldn't stand for the relationship you have right now. And same thing when you start looking at your body. We all make these commitments of, I'm going to lose that spare tire around my midsection. I'm going to feel better. I'm going to operate more effectively as a man or a woman. I'm tired of feeling this way, not having any energy. And so we make these commitments. I'm going to go to the gym. I'm going of feeling this way and not having any energy. And so we make these commitments. I'm going to go to the gym. I'm going to eat better. I'm going to not drink any alcohol. Have you said these things to yourself? And then on Friday night after a long week, much like this week has been for me, a friend calls you and says, hey, we're all going out to dinner and getting drinks. You say, sure, I'd love to come. There's nothing wrong with that, of course. Why wouldn't you go and socialize? A good way to blow off steam. But then when everybody's sitting around the table ordering their drinks, and it's vodka soda here, and it's this beer there, and it's something else on this other side, the fear of judgment and shame and guilt triggers off in your head, and you feel obligated to order a drink, although no one has said that you need to. And just like that, the commitment that you made to yourself just four days earlier is eliminated. You see, these commitments stack up on top of one another and I've said it multiple times and I'm sure I'll say it a few thousand more times in my life. I believe that how we do one thing is how we do everything. And if you can't make a commitment to yourself that you can honor, where else in your life are you not committing? Is it that you listen to the show, listen to my show, you reach out to me, you had a conversation, which turned into a commitment to come to an event. And then you didn't follow through. You didn't pay the open invoice. You didn't return the emails. You justified away why you're not coming. Because your word wasn't worth anything. And I know it's not the only place it's happening. It's happening everywhere else, too. It's just bleeding into something that someone can call you out on it. Maybe that's your commitment. Maybe something as small as that is the catalyst to get you to change your entire perspective on what commitment really can mean to you and what it can do for your life.

Within Ourselves (12:38)

Because we convince ourselves we're much better than we are. I'm guilty. We convince ourselves that one or two momentary slip ups doesn't define us. And I believe that could be true. I believe that we get to write our own story. And we decide what defines us and what does not. But when you're honest with yourself about the lack of commitment and follow through to your own word that you have. When you're actually fucking honest, you'd be shocked at how many times your mouth opens and your actions don't back up your words. And so it's for all those reasons as to why I sit here at 808 on a Friday night, wrapping up another episode of 15 Minutes of Freedom. Because the path back down to mediocrity is a quick and slippery slope laden with broken commitments to myself.

Path To Mediatocy

Path Back To Mediocrity (13:30)

And that from the vantage point that I have, I'm actually fucking worth it. And that if I don't honor the commitment to myself, all hell breaks loose. I'd encourage you as I wrap up tonight's episode to begin to view your life the same way that the simple, small commitments to bettering yourself, that you do it when it's convenient and you stop when it's difficult are the exact reasons you're not going to change. And I don't care if that means working with me or working with someone else. I don't care if it means that you committed to reading a book and you stopped. I don't care if it means that you committed to literally take five minutes a day for yourself and for some reason you don't do it. That broken commitment is breaking your spirit, and the broken spirit is swallowing your growth. When you finally put together enough sequential days where you honor your commitment above all else to yourself, you'll find out on the backside you're able to get shit done.

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