Episode 36: Limiting Beliefs - 15 Minutes to Freedom Podcast | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Episode 36: Limiting Beliefs - 15 Minutes to Freedom Podcast".

1970-01-01T01:00:16.000Z

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Introduction

Intro (00:00)

This is 15 Minutes to Freedom. I'm your host, Ryan Neidell, and today's episode is Limiting Beliefs. So beliefs are a unique thing. You know, when you sit back and you analyze where your beliefs come from or what are the beliefs that you have in your head and then think to yourself, where did they come from? How do you answer that question? For me, it's something that's puzzled me for longer than I care to admit. You know, the belief system that is instilled upon me when I look at it is a multifaceted conversation. Obviously, at the very base level, we're all – our belief systems are funneled through our parents. From a developmental age, typically, if things go at least halfway right in your life, you have parents that raise you or some parental figure that raise you, even if it's not biological. What they believe to be true and their beliefs end up being passed down to you. Caught by proximity, caught by blood, caught by whatever you want to, but think about it. Religion is a hot button for me for whatever the reason. So if you grew up in a primarily, we'll say Catholic household, you're used to the Catholic way of life. You know, probably have a rosary, went to church every Sunday, are used to kneeling and standing and kneeling and standing in service. And that was what you believed to be true. That is your belief. But that belief, you never had be true. That is your belief. But that belief you never had the opportunity to determine on your own. That belief was passed down to you. Not saying that belief is good or bad, but it's eliminated your ability to have critical thinking to decide if that belief actually fits your life. It's just given to you. And maybe religion's not the best example for this. Maybe we look at socioeconomic this. Maybe we look at socioeconomic standards. We'll look at the wealth that you're quote-unquote allowed to have in your life. If you grew up in an upper middle class family or even middle class family that had enough money to pay for food and their house and maybe vacation once a year, but didn't have a tremendous amount of savings, probably had some credit card debt. And you heard consistent things from your family like, you know, we don't have the money for this. Or those are what the wealthy people get to have. We're not those people. And so it starts beating a belief in your head that you're only supposed to have what you have or what your family's accustomed to. Well, that's not necessarily real. That's just the belief that they've created for you. Or I'll call it a social confine. That's a confine that is created to not allow you to expand past the point you're currently at. Let's take it a step further. You've gone through the developmental ages.


Concepts And Strategies For Personal Development

Raise the bar for your limits (02:35)

Now you get into the high school age. And you're a high school age individual, man or woman, and you know right from wrong because your parents have taught you what right from wrong is and you've now had enough time on the planet to decide what right from wrong is in your situation. But yet, as rambunctious teenagers, most of us can't help but to sneak out of the house at one point or another. Maybe go toilet papering. Maybe drink underage. We do these things not because they're necessarily morally incomprehensible, but moreover because because they're necessarily morally incomprehensible, but moreover because society or our group of peers are suggesting that that's an okay thing to do, that somebody started it. Or generations or age groups above us, the seniors in high school, are passing down to the ranks, us freshmen or sophomores, like this is how you sneak out of your house, this is the place you go to buy the beer, this is the hotel that will let you book a room if you're underage. And so you have this belief system that's being created at that moment, but that's okay.


Think critically (03:22)

Again, perhaps it is, perhaps it's not. I don't believe that right from wrong truly exists in the way that we look at it. Those again are confines that we've created, like what is right and what is wrong? What makes my moral compass stronger or more weak than yours? Nothing. Suggestion at best. So we take the family episode from the first part of your life. We take the social episode from that high school part of life. Let's say you go through college and the drinking and all the things that go on there are just kind of unknown. That's just the way the world works. Then you get into the real world and you get to the point of having a job and maybe girlfriends or significant others. And the environment now at that point, the people you're around or to the point of having a job and maybe girlfriends or significant others. And the environment now at that point, the people you're around or spend the most of your time with, which is going to be your coworkers, are going to have a massive impact on how you conduct business throughout your life. I'm the perfect example for this. For me, figuring as I have a fairly strong character at this point in life, didn't used to have it, have it now, as I look back and was associating with people that were liars and cheating on their significant others and drank a lot and did cocaine. Cocaine was never my thing.


Social Imprinted Beliefs (04:36)

I've never tried it before. But everything else counts. I had accepted that those were just the way things were to be. If I was to be successful in the car industry or if that was the path I was on and they were successful, then I could do the exact same thing and have the same success. So that's my belief. My belief is now ingrained upon me by my environment that this is how life is supposed to be. But why? Like these are all beliefs that we created or someone really created for us that we then accept to be true. Well, how much better would your life be if you started to shift some of those beliefs? Or maybe not shift them, we'll say question them. So I'm reading a book right now. And in that book, some of these beliefs are referred to as BRULES. B-R-U-L-E-S. BRULES. And BRULES is nothing more than bullshit rules. And bullshit rules are meant to be questioned. And I think really every social confine or every confine that exists in the world is really a BRULE. Like sure, I know that I'm sitting in a room right now that has lights shining on me.


Religious Conundrums (05:39)

It's hot as hell. Our air conditioning doesn't work. These are factual pieces of life. But I can question the whys. Okay, so I see the light in front of me. I know it's there, but what is it? Why is it getting to me? How does that work? Just because some scientists that are proven to be right or told to be right and passed down through generations say that that's how this works means that I have to accept it? I don't think so. I think the more people start to question the way that things work, the rules that exist, the more advanced our society becomes. Think about it in your own life. We'll take it back to the religious conversation. Again, my view of religion is way out there. I get that now. But if we just take religion as a whole, you're probably practicing the same religion more often than not than your parents practiced., you're probably practicing the same religion more often than not than your parents practiced. And you're probably practicing and give or take the same way that they practice it. I'm not saying that's not right. That could be the best possible thing for you to do to increase your connection to God. By all means, keep going down that path. But let's say again, you are a Christian Catholic individual. Well, how do you know if you haven't went to a Buddhist temple? Or you haven't tried to go to a Mormon temple? Or you haven't found your own religious beliefs? How do you know that one of those doesn't fit your spirituality more? There'd be no way to know. Same thing when it comes to relationships. I saw my father and mother argue all the time. I saw them get divorced. I saw my father and mother argue all the time. I saw them get divorced I saw my father have another child. I saw all these things go on that Could have been accepted as my reality and admittedly through my 20s These all framed my reality like I thought it was okay to cheat on who I was with Not the fact of I knew it was morally wrong But it's just like ah, that's just what you do.


Cleaning house (07:13)

You just kind of brush under the rug Like what's the big deal like the girls would be okay. I'm getting what I want out of the situation. But as I mature and I grow and I start questioning that confine, that structure that I put around myself, it's like, why in the world would I assume that to be the right way to operate? And then I'm around all these other individuals now that lead these very unhappy marriages, these very unhappy lives, consistently get away from their significant other and say, bitch, like, she doesn't do this. We don't have sex enough. She doesn't have the, you know, dinner ready. Our house is dirty. My yard's not mowed. Motherfucker, like, I don't have space for that in my life anymore. Like, that doesn't work because that turns into another confine. That turns into another association. That turns into another belief that is now impressed upon me that doesn't match up with my belief system. And too many of us, at least in my social circle or me personally, used to sweep things under the rug like that. Like it's no big deal. They're just going through a tough time. Well, it is a big deal. Because what you let into your life affects your beliefs. So if enough people around you are saying, like, it's okay to talk poorly about your wife, then all of a sudden you subconsciously start speaking poorly about your wife. There could be nothing wrong with your relationship at all. There probably isn't. But the associations that you keep and the beliefs you start to form impact everything that comes out of your mouth. So when you have the limiting factor in your life is really your belief system, you start to realize that you have control to change that belief. There is no belief that's so steadfast you can't question it and then ultimately control how you feel about it. I don't care what it is. For me, I had all these self-limiting beliefs.


Fix Your Mindset (08:58)

Up until Warrior Week a few weeks ago, I would have said always that I was not good enough. I was not intelligent enough. I was not powerful enough. I was not athletic enough. I was not handsome enough. The list of I'm not enoughs was staggering. I didn't fully realize it because it was subconscious. I've been recording this podcast since before Warrior Week. I've wanted to do this for a long time, but I kept telling myself I couldn't. It was a belief that nobody would care what I have to say or that I would be judged by what I'm saying and that I couldn't handle the ridicule. And more importantly, what if nobody listened? What if I launched a podcast and I had four people and they just all happened to my family? How does that work? How embarrassing is that for me? Those were my beliefs. That was going to be my end result of launching a podcast Not only that that my business couldn't be successful Or that I believe that I couldn't have a relationship that stayed together I was always waiting for me to come home and lindsey to say like look i'm out of here I've had enough This just doesn't work Even after I stopped being an asshole I kept coming home assuming that the shoe was going to drop. And she's like, look, I've just had enough. I want somebody new. You aren't enough. But that's wild. Like, that's crazy. There's no part of my life that she ever showed me that that would be true. It was a belief system that I had based off of I go way back to the way that my father and I interacted. And then the way my mother and I interacted. And then the first series of significant girlfriends that I had, the way that I interacted with them. They just broke up with me. So that becomes my new belief system. That's the way this works. But it's not. So when you start shifting your mindset and shifting your focus, and then ultimately questioning your beliefs and shifting them to something that makes you more powerful, it puts you in the driver's seat. Like I believe at this point in life that I am a divine creature just as you are. When I say divine creature, I don't care what religious group you belong to or if you're agnostic or even atheist. There is something about you that is individual to anything else on the planet, which makes you divine. So if in fact you are a divine individual, let's assume that to be true, then you have divinity of power inside of you because we all have our own unique amount of power. Some of us know how to tap into it more than others and some of us will never know how to tap into it because we never questioned enough beliefs to find it. See, society and the general way the world works doesn't want you to find your power. You start in elementary school being told to stand in line, don't speak up, don't question anything. You learn not to learn and retain.


No Confidence Coach (11:31)

You learn and study to pass a test. Everything that we're doing is meant to confine you. It's not meant to have you expand. Then there's a handful of people that we call disruptors. You look at Elon Musk. You look at Steve Jobs. Look at Bill Gates. These are all people that were incredibly intelligent but also bucked the system at one point. They started questioning how the hell does this actually work and does it actually serve me? Their answers were no, fortunately. Without that, we wouldn't have the Tesla vehicle that's autonomous and electric. We wouldn't have the MacBook that I'm running this podcast off of or the iPhone that's shooting one of the recordings on. We wouldn't have these things because nobody questioned the belief system that it couldn't be possible. So as you look at your life as a whole, where are you limiting your growth based off your beliefs? Isn't your business that you just believe that you can't ever go out and start your own business because you're more likely to fail than succeed? Fuck everybody. Yeah, there's a good chance you're more likely to fail than succeed? Fuck everybody. Yeah, there's a good chance you're going to fail, but not if you work hard enough. Not if you work hard enough long enough. Not if you work hard enough long enough and smart enough. Eventually, you will succeed. You have to outlast the suck, I call it. You have to run through the walls. You have to be familiar with broke. There's all these cliche terms. At the end of the day, it all comes down to consistency. If you want to go start your own business or you want something more than you have now, you just have to start going down that path and keep going down that path until you wake up one day and you're like, huh, I'm not broke anymore. This isn't too bad. And then keep going. Maybe it's in your relationship. You just always believe the fact that you are the type of man that can't be faithful. It's just not in your DNA. And then you justify it with the fact of our genealogy says, you know, we're supposed to spread our seed. You're supposed to go and pregnant as many women as you can. If you go back to our ancestors. So, you know, Ryan, I just can't really help it. I just have to go out and sleep with women. That's all bullshit. Sure. Is there a part of every man alive that sees another woman or smells another woman's like, man, she's attractive. Absolutely. Any man that tells you different is a liar. We're all human. But you have the control of the impulses in your life to make a decision if that's worth cheating on the significant other you're with or not. That is a choice. That is a belief and a choice based around your environment and based around your upbringing that you control. You control if you sleep with somebody else. You control if you make that bad decision.


They See All Men Like This (13:46)

Same thing in your body. Maybe for me, maybe for you, you're overweight right now. And not necessarily obese. You just aren't happy with the way that you look in clothing. But you say to yourself over and over again, my parents were fat. My parents were overweight. I can't be healthy. I can't look the way that I want to look. That's a belief system that you've created that is complete and utter bullshit. You aren't big boned. You don't have a slow metabolism. You don't have any of that stuff. What you have right now is a lack of belief in yourself. Look at how many biggest loser contestants have lost hundreds of pounds only to go back to an old way of life and gain the weight back because they didn't change their beliefs. They figured out the process to lose the weight, but they didn't figure out the process to change their mindset. They didn't question why. They just went because they were told they had to. It has to come from inside. All these beliefs that limit who you are are self-defeating. But the opposite of self-defeating is self-empowering. So you can take every one of these beliefs, everything that you don't like about your life, analyze the belief that created it, and turn it into something powerful.


Analyzing Your Beliefs (14:46)

Like all these are choices. And this is an awakening I've went through in the past year and a half. More specifically, in the past six months. That I finally realized the fact that if I want a private jet and a Rolls Royce and every person around me to experience massive affluence, but also to take care of a number of people, a massive number of people, it's just a belief that I can do it and then action to make it happen. Like belief isn't enough. There also has to be a follow through and action. But if you believe in something hard enough and strong enough, then you should organically be taking action to follow up on that belief. Just like right now, if you believe the only way to heaven is to go to church every Sunday, I'm going to guess you're probably dragging your rear end out of bed no matter what you do on Saturday night and you're going to church because that is your belief. No different than if you believe that you need to make a million dollars, that's going to make you happy, then you better figure out how the hell to get out of bed every day and go make it happen. If you believe you deserve a better relationship than what you have, you better figure out how to get out of bed every day and go find one and then go create it and then cultivate it and make it what you want it to be. Same thing with your body. It's a belief to have the body you want followed up with action of not eating shit food. Don't go to a drive-thru. When you're hungry, stop at a gas station and get a quick pack of almonds Little life hack right there I spend a lot of time on the road You stop in any gas station in America, you can get plain almonds It's got enough fiber in it and enough protein to start to satiate your hunger You're going to have to pass the chips to get there You're going to have to pass the candy bars You're going to have to pass the donuts You're going to have to pass the soda You're going to have to pass the alcohol And find this little tiny section that has almonds. If you want to start making changes in your life, drink a gallon of water a day and eat almonds.


Tips For Rapid Progress

WAKE UP AND ACHIEVE 10-15/YR (16:22)

You'd be surprised what happens in 25 days. All these things, all these little life hacks, all these ideas of changing your belief system and that the limiting beliefs that you have in your life are really what's holding you back more than anything else are all a way to get you to shift and start to see the world differently because if you see the world differently, you're able to put that one foot in front of the other chasing your goals in a much more rapid fashion than you currently have been doing. And that new rapid fashion and that new foot in front of the other is just another way of saying every day that you have to get shit done. Hey guys, Ryan here. Thanks for joining me today. If you've enjoyed this podcast, please head over to iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you consume audio and subscribe to 15 minutes to freedom. If this brought you value, please do me a favor and drop me a five-star rating. Then share this podcast with someone who needs to hear it. For additional content, head over to RyanNidell.com. That's R-Y-A-N-N-I-D-D-E-L dot com.


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