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Michael Strahan on Escaping the Matrix and Finding Happiness | Impact Theory | Transcription
Transcription for the video titled "Michael Strahan on Escaping the Matrix and Finding Happiness | Impact Theory".
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How to remove all self-limitations (03:52)
It's not if it's when. - Yeah. - Which okay most people leave it at the platitude but you went a lot deeper than that. What does like walk us through that philosophy? How do you bridge the gap from if to when? - I think I actually got that from my dad without even knowing. I don't even know if he knew what he was doing. - Yeah, I think it is. He's just a hard driving person. He grew up with nothing in the backwoods of Texas and we're gate Texas. I don't even know if the town exists anymore. And he decided to leave and he went to the army and just enlisted. And he was a soldier for 12 years and he realized I can't be what I wanna be. I can't be an officer. I can't really advance without an education. He got out of the army. After 12 years had five kids and me on the way with the Prairie View University and went into the ROTC program and called him old man. You can't do this, you can't do that. And he graduated Magnacolmati of the ROTC class. And so I can't tell him what I can't do. 'Cause he's been in a lot tougher situation than he's done it. And I just remember the kid but to be in working out and doing all those things with him because I started to work out when I was 13 and a little chunky and my brothers called me Bob which is of course he read that in the book, Bob Bob which meant booty on back. And they would say you can grab your wallet over your shoulder, you don't have to reach behind you. It hurt me man, I'm 13 years old. I'm just crushed. I'm the youngest of six, the youngest of four boys. And I bought the Jane Fonda workout book. And I started doing the leg lifts and the butt kicks and my dad saw that. And he said hey, we can go to the gym. And he would read muscle and fitness magazines and all these workout magazines. And he would write out programs and we'd go to the gym. We'd have to write how many reps and how much weight. And he kept meticulous log of things. And I didn't always wanna be there. - Yeah, sure. - But he could tell. And I don't know what it was when you tell a 13, 14, 15 year old kid that we did it until I went off to college was hanging there to pay off one day. Now he's telling this to me and I'm living in Germany. It's not like I'm in the States and I play football. And it's like oh next year you're gonna have a great football season and then you can get a scholarship. It was just hanging there son, it'll pay off one day. And years later he woke up and said hey, I think you're good enough to play football. I think you can get a football scholarship. - This is all in Germany. That's what's weird. It's not like you're playing every day and really around it. - And I'll watch it but I didn't play it. I didn't really know all the nuances or any of the techniques or anything about the game. And he just said hey, you can do it. You're gonna go to Houston, you're gonna stay with your uncle, you're gonna get a football scholarship. And being, I guess naive, I said okay. No big, okay, fine. On the plane I go jump, see my uncle, David my uncle for five months, play one year football high school at Westbury High School in Houston. Got one scholarship to Texas Southern University. Didn't care where it was. I missed him with the accomplish. And I went back to Germany that December and I graduated high school over there. And my dad never told me if, he never doubted me. He said you're gonna do this and you can do that. From a kid until we won the Super Bowl until all these things that are happening now. He's never doubted me and I don't know if it was by design. I don't know if he sent me to Houston because he just was too cheap to pay for college. It worked out and my mentality and I have adopted that for myself and for my kids. It's not, if you really want something bad enough, it's not gonna be easy. And you can see where you wanna go. But there are so many things you're gonna have to go through to get there. But truly if you focus and know where you wanna end up, you'll be there. It may not be at the exact time you want, it's just now kind of immediate for most people. But you'll eventually get there at your time when you're supposed to. - Yeah, it's such a powerful belief and you talk a lot about that in the book. And so I judge books in a very critical fashion, which is either the information is usable or it's not. And then if it's usable, if I do it, will it work or not? Your book is both usable, meaning there's clear, very action oriented steps. It's not just like an autobiography. It's like, hey, do this and this is what I did. If people do what you say in the book, it will actually work. Like it's really incredible advice and it has fantastic backing in your understanding of the brain and all of that. - You make decisions, it's just you. You make choices in your life. You program your mind, need to be happy or not. That's a choice that you make. It's not something that somebody else makes for you. It's not not even your situation. No matter what the situation, you truly do make the choice to be happy in that situation or not. And we also have the ability to change a situation that we're not happy with.
Personal Growth And Relationship Management
How to remedy any difficult relationship (08:54)
- Talk a little bit about that 'cause if for anybody that doesn't know the sort of legendary beef that you had with the final coach at the Giants, it's such a powerful thing. And what I'm talking about specifically is that you've switched, right? So you come in hot, you guys are waiting for you. - Oh, we hated each other. - But then in the end, you said that if you were gonna go back, he's the only one that you'd go back and play for. - Yeah, I absolutely hated Tom Coughlin. And not long ago, I was at the Giants' Monday Night Game to a duck-tim into the Ring of Honor, which was like amazing for me because this is a guy, I went to my first meeting with him and I'd been in the NFL for 11, 12 years. My first meeting with the guy, and I felt as if he was dismissive and as if I hadn't accomplished anything and pretty much listened to me and you can do something with your life, kid. I was thinking, okay, I've kind of done some things already. I felt disrespected and slighted and I went home and I said, I'm playing one year with this guy 'cause I have to now, I'm too late, but I'm not gonna play after this. I can't stay here with this guy. I won't do it. And he already had a bad reputation around the league. It's been a really tough coach. And he was, if your socks weren't pulled up high enough, you're gonna find, if you had blue sleeves on instead of gray sleeves that day, you get a fine. If you're not five minutes early to a meeting, you get fine. I'm like, dude, if the meeting's at 755, just tell me that, don't tell me eight and I get to at 757 and I'm late. It was just, we were butting heads and not just with me, but with all the players, but being that I was a senior leader, they would come to me and I would talk to him, a coach. And he would just go, I hear you, I hear you, I hear you. And it came to a head after he fined me for being three minutes early to a meeting. We had a heated discussion to the point where he was like, you know what? It is what it is. And I said, coach, we just had this discussion. Well, you shouldn't cut it so close. I said, coach, I'm not cutting it close. He goes, well, next time you're lucky, I could have fined you more. And when he said that, it just, that's when the football player's side went. And I heard you say shit, so I'm going cursed. I'm gonna tell you what I said to him. And I said, okay, that's fine. You'll find me. Ain't about the money anyway. It's about the principle. But you know what? Fuck it. Fuck it. You want to find me? I'll come in here when I want to then. If I'm gonna be late, you're gonna find my mother's show up when I want. So I'm gonna do some errands. Then I'll come into this bitch when I want to. And he looked at me like, and I was surprised 'cause that was kind of like, you know, the whole different side out. That usually on the field. And he said, you can't talk to me like that. And I said, yes, I can. Said, no, you can't. I said, yes, I can. You know why? Because you don't respect me. I can't respect you. And I said, come to you every day with all the problems of the players and what the guys are feeling. And you always say to me, I hear you. I hear you. And I said, when you say that, you're just dismissing me. And you think I don't realize that you're dismissing me. But you're losing this team. Do you hear that? And I walked away from it. And ever since that day, our relationship has been like that. This is if we two dogs circling around, who's going to jump on each other. And we finally got into a scrum, but we came out of it with an understanding that we both wanted the same thing. And that was to win. Once we really looked at it deeply, we both wanted to win. And I was so happy to see him change. So the point where it made me change and realize that if you both had the same objectives, you just have to find a way to make it work to get there. He loosened up his stance with the players. We loosened up our stance with his rule as far as we were more attentive to them. And guys felt like we weren't fighting against the rules. We were fighting the opponent on the field, where before we were fighting his rule instead of her focus in on who we were playing that week. And he became a coach who would come in and tell jokes and give you a hug and tell you he loved you. And before he was not that guy. - Yeah, and I've heard you tell stories about, it was sort of the insight of seeing him with other kids, players, kids, his own grandkids. - Her winner. - So how? - Curt Warner on the day off, you know, the quarterbacks they go and they pick up the game plan and Curt Warner our quarterback at the time, went in to pick up his game plan with his kids. He goes into the quarterback coach of the office and when he comes out, coach conflict is on the floor with his kids outside the office plan. And it's like, why don't we as players see that compassion, that side of you? Because it's definitely there. We see you with your grandkids sometimes, but it was amazing to see him do it. And he learned how to transfer that over to us as adults. And we in turn learned how to, you know, give him everything because as a coach, the toughest thing and thing I loved about playing and the one thing I love about work and working with a lot of people is the leadership aspect. It is the opportunity to get so many people to believe in one thing that makes everybody better so that everybody wins. And in order to do that, you may have to make everybody have value and feel valuable. I don't care if there's somebody sweeping the floor or the other president or the company. Everybody needs to be treated like a human being with value and if they are, they will do anything for you. And once he got that down, guys would do anything for him. And I was one of those guys that once I was into that matrix, anything he needed, it would get done. And all the way down to just my belief and I was winning a Super Bowl and watching all that happen and just the way that we did it. And now if I had to go back and play, seriously, I wouldn't play for any other coach. If he wanted me to play for him, I would play for him only. - It's interesting that you tie it to compassion. So one of the most fascinating things about you off camera, which dear God, if you ever get a chance to spend time with my kids, take it, take it, hang out, I'm around, just let me know. Hit him up on that. Let me tell you right now. - So Joe Glaser summed you up really well when he was doing the Hall of Fame induction sp the bear hugs, the just kindness, the generosity of spirit. - I like people. - But here's the thing, it's one thing to like people when you're on camera and everyone is going to distrust that. It's another when you're just, you really are like that. And it's from a leadership perspective, it's such a beautiful thing to open yourself up to that. I love your ritual of going around before the game and touching everybody. - Yeah, over four. - And I actually really want to start doing that with the team here. Like we've got such a group of die hard people. And it had like in doing, so the whole point to me of the people that I bring on the show is to bring people the more I research them, the more I get to know who they are, that I'll find these little nuances that I can bring into my own life. And when I pictured you going around to everybody and saying, I'm accountable to you, right? I'm accountable to you. And when I go out on that field, I'm going to hold us up. I'm going to do what we've all agreed that we're here to accomplish. And I thought, oh my God, like that's so powerful and to have built that trust and rapport with them ahead of time where they feel connected to you. And then you say, hey, I'm here to serve you. Right? We're all going to do this together. That's super-- It's bigger than me. It was always bigger than me. And I had success on a football field. Single or success. I've been defensive player of the year a few times. And it's like, I can't celebrate this or a team at Lutley Records. I never found much joy in something that was a singular success. The best time does anyone ever ask me, what is the best thing from your career? It's like, it's a Super Bowl. It's everybody being able to celebrate the accomplishment of us as a team and not me as an individual. There is definitely a switch you have to have. And to me, I do love people. And it's natural for me to be nice to people. I don't know any other way. I don't know why you wouldn't be. But it's also has worked for me because in anything, I do, I have to be fake. I don't have to be something I'm not. I don't have to be nice to you here and then leave and you see me later on because I've been around a lot of people like that. And it's as if they're a different person. Like, I just saw you 10 minutes ago. Who's this guy? Right. And I never wanted to be that. I always wanted to be myself the entire time, which works great for me. I love psychology of things. That's why I think I love a team. I love getting people on the same page. In the psychology of from football to me and in the media with football and simple things, you get the game program every week. And it's the same picture throughout the whole year of the guys. But I had a ritual. I would look at the program. I would look at everybody on my team, saying guys. And then I would look at the other team's guys. And when you're a young player, you get intimidated by faces. And some guys sitting there looking like this. And you're like, oh, man, I got the killer. Oh, I don't look scared. But as I got older, I said psychologically. If somebody looks like that, then they're-- then OK. But how much more afraid would you be if somebody you don't with a killer, and they just smile? So in my program, I'd be like this. It looked like a glamorous shot. It looked like I went to the mall. It was like, this is the guy? He must be crazy to be smiling these photos like this. And so I would just do a little silly things like that. With the media, I didn't talk every day. So then I said, I'll talk one day a week. I'll talk to third stage. And I did it because if you talk all the time, it's like going to the same restaurant. It's not special. And especially in the media of New York, when there are so many different people and so many outlets, and everybody just-- there's so much content, you need yours to stand out. So if you want to talk to me, and you only get me one day a week, I guarantee you when I talk to you, you're going to cherish that, and you're going to use that. And I would mix it up on the media as well as they would give me a hard time. I give them a hard time. One question today. I'm not in a bad mood, but I just act like I give me one question. Ask me one. Answer, ask me a second. I'll say, and hear what I said. I said one. I'm sorry. I got to go. All right. Another day that I sit there, and I would chat. How your wife's doing? You know, everything's good. And I would just mix them up, keep them off their off balance a little bit. And I just enjoyed the psychological battle of football. I enjoyed the psychological battle of the media. And in a lot of ways now, it's not quite the same. But I still like that aspect of psychologically getting everybody on the same page would be successful. Yeah, there's some pretty incredible footage of you getting-- well, let's talk psychological warfare and then getting everybody on the same page. So one, the trash talking that you did when you would tackle people was absolutely fantastic. I'm a trash guy. Welcome home, baby. I love it. There were some great ones. But then what you did in the Super Bowl was really, really crazy. And I want to hear, what was the psychological principle at work? So the team is losing. But you gather everybody on the sideline and you say, you're losing at the moment. I think it was 10 to 14. To the undefeated champions coming into this game, and you say with very little time left, guys, we're one drive away. We're going to win 17 to 14. That's going to be the final score. If you believe it, it's going to happen. Gene Strayhead, my dad. That's crazy. It was weird. Because by the way, that was the end score. That was the end score against an undefeated team, 18 and 0 at that point, and had beaten us early in the season. And I just-- my dad that week in Phoenix, he said, you know what? You guys have already won the game.
How to develop a winning mindset (21:07)
And I was like, I think an old man's losing it. What's he talking about? You guys have already won the game. Now you just have to go through the formalities. But trust me, you've already won the game. And I'm thinking, have you seen the Patriots? Have you seen their record? They said, good day artists. Tom Brady and Randy Moss. Did you say, like, all the phenomenal Hall of Fame players over there? And we got to the point in that game, where there were just several things that come to mind. Bill Belichick is a brilliant coach, probably the best coach ever, to coach professional football. And we had a fourth down. They had to punt. He rushed to the punt team out there. They run a punt. We didn't get all our guys off the field in time. So it gives them a first down in our territory. And Phil Goppodish and everything else. And Tom Coughlin's losing it. He's beat ready. He's screaming on the sideline. And I just had such a piece during that game. So he tells the story all the time. And he said, you reached over and you grabbed me by my shoulders before you ran out on the field. And you smiled and said, coach, don't worry. We got it. And we go out. I actually got a sack. I said, the sack I got on that drive moved them out of field code position. They didn't score any points. And that was just like the peacefulness of the game. So when we came to that point in the fourth quarter where they scored and they went up 14-10, it was like, you know what? If dad said we're going to win, damn it, we're going to win. Now I'm not on offense. I can't do anything about it. But I'm going to go over here and talk to the guys who can. And we're in this together. Our journey to get there has been too great to end like this. I mean, we're here for a reason. There's something special about us being here because we were not supposed to be here. And I went on and said, 17, 14 fellows will be the final score. Believe it and it will happen. One touchdown will work. We'll be world chambered. Believe it and it will happen. And we won 17 to 14. And I retired after that. What I love about stories like that, from someone who has built their career around hard work, discipline, watching more tape, putting in more hours, running the stairs more often, is that the lurking behind the, believe it and it will happen is psychological principle for lack of better word, right? So it's what are the things that you do on a regular basis from a routine perspective to build that mindset to know that you've put in the work that you're able to execute and essentially not get in your own way? I think we've done ourselves more than anybody else that redows us. So and I fight that too. I fight that every day, especially with these new jobs and businesses that I've never thought that I would be in and never knew I could be in or could be any good at. And I think the things, the routines that I have, my routines are very simple.
Why simple routines are often the best (24:03)
I find out what the job is and I bust my ass to get it done. And it's not, half the stuff is not that complicated. For GMA, I understand it, I need to read. I need to read a lot. I need to know what I'm talking about before I open my mouth. And it's something great about that because it's challenged me in a way that I haven't been challenged that live, I didn't have to do that. Live, I could take two minutes to read the questions that I'm gonna ask the guest. And then the rest of it was personality driven. So I could get away with just, you know, being there and just being, you know, I guess joyful and entertaining. Where GMA requires some of that, but it requires for you to have some knowledge on different things. And that's what I love about it. It takes me back, to be honest with you, to football. And it relates to football to me because not growing up playing, I was still learning my 15th and final season. I never got bored with the game. And that's how I feel about GMA. I don't think I'll ever get bored because every day is so different. And every day is a challenge. And so for me, it's about just studying and knowing what my job is and knowing what my job description is and knowing what I can bring to the equation. And the toughest thing, you know, going to GMA for me was figuring that out because you have Georgia and you have Robin, you have Larry. And you have people who have been established on the show that has been established for a long time and how does my personality fit in? So it's been like running into a wall here and there until I can find, okay, I fit into that slot and let me find the next one. And it's a work in progress. You know, I work every day. You know, the wheels are spinning in my head as I'm sitting there with the camera on my face and I'm talking about how to be myself within a situation that you usually don't have a chance to inject personality into. But that's what they want. And, but it's been a challenge, but it's been fun. It's been exciting and I wake up every day and I love being there and I love making the people around me happy that I'm there. That's important to me too. - Yeah, that was really neat. So going from part time to full time, you do the first day and I remember one of the first things they said to you, I forget who said it, but she said, you know, we're all looking forward to our morning kiss on the cheek and she said it so warmly. It was like for a second, she was not a TV personality. She was your friend and she was super stoked that it was like going to be, you know, this like summer party every day that you guys were going to get to be able to hang out and I thought, wow, that's so cool that you're able to have that. - And I'm a routine person. Like if I take my wallet out of my pants at night, I know where I put it. That way I know it's there. Like I go, I'll wear my wallet out. Where are my keys? I'm not that guy. But I'm also a routine person in terms of when I go to work, like good morning. Very simple words, not hard. I'm joyful and happy to be there. I'm going to be the same. I'm going to, good morning. Talk to this everybody and certain people. I know they're the connection when you got a, you know, good morning, shake somebody's hand, you give them, or you walk by and you give them a tap on the shoulder. Like those things are important because when I was a kid, I was washing dishes.
How to manifest happiness (27:22)
I was cutting grass. I was a mover and you were unseen. You were very unseen and unappreciated. And in some ways, talk to it if you weren't, you know, not only say we weren't human, but you just were below. I had level below. And that has always bothered me. And to this day, it bothers me to think about that. Because I remember when that was happening, thinking to myself, you think this is where I'm going to be. This is just what I got to do now to get where I'm going. And I didn't necessarily know where I was going, but I knew it was not going to be there. And so it's very important that when I walk in, there's one particular security guard who, you know, every time you walk in, he just, and now I say, good morning, how you doing? Hey, but have a good day, everything else. And now when I walk in, hey, Michael, how you doing? I get totally changed. I see his, he's happy when I walk around that corner. And just because he feels valuable, man, and that's so important to me, because you get so much more out of yourself and so much more out of people, because you're in an environment, you create it. You create it happiness, because you want to be happy, and you want to be around happy people. And sometimes, you got to bang your head against the wall to make it happen, but you have to be consistent with it, and you have to be persistent with it. And if you are, then people come around to that. And then people can trust you because they know what they're going to get. One of the worst things is to be unpredictable in terms of your emotion or the way that you approach people. Because that makes people, you know, I don't want to be that answer. Never want to be that guy. I want to be the guy that you know what you're going to get, unless you were a reporter when I was a player. But you know what you're going to get, and you know what you're going to get is going to be genuine. It's going to be honest. It's going to be real. It's going to be sincere. And you're going to get everything I have to make this work. And in some ways, I'm a perfectionist at work. If I mess up one word or not, think of something, I don't watch myself on TV for that reason. Have to try, bothers me. Because all that was great. I'll go, damn, I missed that. - Yeah. - I see. - You guys know exactly how you feel. - No, for real. And so going back to what you're saying about creating happiness, which is incredibly, really, really important concept that I hope everybody is listening to, once you understand it's a creation, once you understand it's neurochemistry, once you understand that that's something that you can craft and control, everything in your life changes. Once you realize that, that it's all a construct, right? That you can shape it. Then you realize that you're awake in the matrix. And that was the first thing that you and I connected over when we first met. And I don't even remember why I brought it up, I guess, 'cause I'm so obsessed with the matrix. I bring it up to everybody, but I'm literally wearing this shirt in your honor. The matrix was the documentary. - Because that was my movie, man. - You said it impacted your phone. - Oh, my God, did it ever. It was weird, that movie, everybody watched it. They taught me how great it was. And I'm one of these guys. You're telling me how great everything is? Ah, it can't be that good. And I wait. So I didn't see it until it was on one of these cable channels. And I'm watching it. And that point where he gets shot. And you think he's dead. And then she believes in him and she kisses him and he comes back and then the Mr. Smith turns around and they shoot at him again and he goes, no. - Yeah. - A stop, whatever. And he takes the bullet and then he, and Lawrence Fisburg goes, he is the one. He believed in himself. He didn't limit himself. He limited himself up until that point. And I used to think, oh, I get a sack. Oh, I got a sack, okay. Oh, that's good. I don't know if I get another sack. Oh man, oh, I get two, oh, I don't know if I can get three. And I started, why can't I get, why say one is enough? Why am I limiting myself and anything I do? And as a football player changed me, I set the sack record there. I didn't have a sack the first three games of that season. So to get all those sack, there was in 13 games. - That's incredible. - Which I look back and go, holy smoke, but it was, I don't know, I just would go and go. And I didn't say, okay, Michael, that's good enough. It was like, okay, Michael, you got one. Go get two, go get another one and go get another one. And that movie just truly that moment, it was like, I see it now and I smile because it just makes me realize we limit ourselves and why. - Yes. - You hold yourself back when there's no reason to hold yourself back. 'Cause there is no reason, as a friend of mine told me, like he said, Michael, there's no reason that a black man with a gap tooth in his mouth who can't say the letter S without spitting on people should be on TV talking for a living. - And he's 100% right. Though I have proven that the Matrix works. Anything is possible. - That's awesome. That's your version of stopping the bullets. - Yeah. - I was watching that clip today, I was thinking about you, I was thinking about the Matrix and I put that clip on where he says, "Are you telling me I can dodge bullets?" No, Neo, when you're ready, you won't have to. Ah, like that, I know what a nerd I am like, I totally get that. But like, I geek out to the shit and the funny thing is-- - He gives me chills, he would say that, it's like, oh, you're breaking it. - Oh yeah, as you were saying it, me as well. And the funny thing is, so people look at you and they think, oh, it must come easy for him. He must not have a problem in social situations. You know, all that's on the football field, oh, he's just a big tough guy. So yeah, of course it's easy for him. And the thing that I love about the, I don't think that you can be on camera and not create a persona, right? 'Cause you're gonna have to project something. So you're asking yourself, what am I gonna project? But I love that you have clearly made the demand that the thing you project has to actually be you. And so you're so honest, and for someone like me who has spent so much time like, am I the only one who's afraid of shit? Like, what is going on? Like, I have to overcome this all the time. And so people always say to me, like, oh, you must be really relaxed in front of the camera. You see, I'm like, I am literally like freaking out every time before I do one of these shows. Like the 10 minutes leading up to it and thinking, God, am I gonna be able to pull it off this time? Or is this the one, right? We imagine doing that every day. That's me every day. It really is. And the thing is, innately, I'm a shy guy. I'm still that chubby kid, Bob. With easy access to the wallet. With easy access to my wallet. And I'm still that shy kid. So I do what I do and I love what I do. But the second that is over and I'm like, walking down the street and people go, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, it makes me want to curl up like that 13 year old kid again. And I don't know what it is. When I play football my first year, I played when I was seven and eight years old. And I was a good player. And I cried the entire game. But I tell you, not just cry ball, like, it's not bubble cries. Like nasty cries. And the coach would pull me out. It was wrong. - Nothing. - Nothing. It's because I would make a tackle or I'd make a play. And the big plans would clap and yeah, and I'd go and I just, oh, it made me so uncomfortable. And that's how I get a little bit when I'm off camera. And people come up because, oh, you did this and you did that. And it makes me feel like, yeah, I don't know. I don't, when football was over, I kind of, you know, I know what I did, but I don't pay attention. I have a Super Bowl ring and I pull it out or somebody asks me to see it. But other than that, I forget I have it. I know I got it, but I forget physically the ring. I know I won that game. And it's just weird. I don't hang on to stuff like that. You know, I kind of, feel like holding on to the past. It's kind of keeping me from moving. And one day when I decided I don't want to go forward anymore and I'm done career wise, then I look back and I go, okay, well, maybe I'm pretty good. - That's actually really interesting and really powerful for me. 'Cause I feel exactly the same way. Now I may have gotten lucky in this 'cause my memory is actually really bad. - Your memory's bad. - Oh, my friend, my friend. I'm telling you. So, and this is one of the, like right now, you're doing that thing that people do to you and you fucking hate. So how am I able to do this? Because I work my ass off because I understand that my memory is bad. - I think everyone would think, like for even me. And I'm knowing you, I would think your memory is fantastic. - So let's say I want to remember 10 amazing facts. I know I only remember 10%. So now I got to read 100 fucking facts. That's literally my life. Like part of the reason I read as voraciously as I do, the reason I take notes, the reason I record voice memos, the reason that I go back over this stuff is because that's what I have to do to make it usable, right? So for me, it's all about usability. Like what is this company, the aim of this company, the aim of the show is literally to get people out of the matrix. But you have to understand what that means. Getting someone out of the matrix is simply to get them to stop saying, I got one, I guess I can't get two sacks. That's it. Like once you do that, you're out. - The limit. - But you, yes, you have to, I have chosen my face. - Just 'cause this shit like, yeah. - But everyone thinks it's easy. Everyone thinks you're not scared. Everyone thinks you haven't had failures or they've had plenty of failures. But I don't look at failure. I've never looked at a failure to said, oh, whoa is me. Oh, I don't know, I'm just programming. No, I didn't work, okay? Let's go. Next thing, work harder. Figure something else out, keep going. I'm not programmed to go. I didn't work out and let me contemplate and feel sorry for myself. And go over here and get sympathy. I just, I don't know if it's the way I was brought up or if it's from the business of football, where it's a win or a lose. It's like success or failure. And if you lose a football game, I don't have time to think about how I lost it and what I did wrong because if I'm doing that, the guy I'm playing next week is getting ahead of me. So I gotta worry about what's coming up next and push for what's next and get better for what's next. Not get better for what's in the, not worry about what I wasn't good enough for in the past. And I've done sitcom fail, the business of fail.
The blessings of an imperfect life (38:04)
You know, but you figure it out. Life is about figuring it out. Life is not going to be perfect. And if you expect it to be perfect, you're fooling yourself. And a perfect life without a challenge is not a perfect life. It's a boring life, boring. - Did you see the movie War Dogs? - Oh, the Gun Runners? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, I did. - All right, there's a great line in there, which they don't intend this way, but when you were talking, it really hit me. They say the money's made between the lines. Now in the movie, they're talking about something a little bit different, but when you were saying like, "I fail and I think about, okay, what's next? How do I learn from this? You know, what's the pivot? How do I move or reinvent yourself?" That's the money. Like if people wanna know how you've had such astronomical success in so many crazy different arenas, it's that when you said life is about figuring it out, I was like, no one's gonna write that down. Like people at home and I'm putting a fucking pin in it, so people will write it down because once they get that the magic of Michael Strahan is that, that you take the time to assess and figure it out, like you were saying with GMA, and watching you on GMA has been so cool to see you really changing from what you were doing on live with Kelly and Michael. Like what you were calling the, it was personality, you know, roll up and shine. And then now this, I see you, and you've talked about it in the book about, I wanted a challenge and I needed to know, am I saying no to this because I'm scared? Because if that's it, then I'm going all in. Because fear is just something that you can overcome and figure out. That dude, that to me, like, the juices worth the squeeze, right? Yeah, the juices worth the squeeze. You read that book, but I definitely-- Michael? I definitely was there. I didn't more than read that book. I have notes upon notes of that book. It is really powerful. Thank you. So I was blown away. Thank you. So good. Well, you know what, the mission accomplished there, you know? And I don't know, man. You talk about all the accomplishments and stuff, but for me, I really haven't done any like much. Like I feel like I'm just like starting. I love that. And Matt, tell me if this is true. The reason that you feel like that is, 'cause you're always looking forward, you're not looking back, and you're always putting yourself in a situation where you're a little bit sucky. And your goal is to rapidly stop sucking at that. But by the time you're good at that, you're already looking at the next thing that you're a little bit sucky at. And the cycle repeats, right? But that's how you escalate. So when you and I went and we met your mutual friend or your friend, who, what he does with Holmes is unbelievable. It is on another planet. And you and I got in the car and we're like, there's levels to this shit. - You know, it was like, what is happening? - We thought we were doing our right. - Yeah. - This was level for this shit, real. - It was bonkers, but I felt in that moment such a kindred spirit to you because I did not look at that house and go, I can't have it. I looked at that house and thought, what do I need to do? What's next? What situation now do I have to put myself in? Like what is that construct? And I think of that, you know, going back to the Matrix, I think of that in sort of all aspects of my life. Like what's that next thing? And thinking about what you're doing, the partnership that you have with JCPenney, like how do you have the guts to kick that off fashion to like true entrepreneurship? It's no longer personality driven. Like your stuff's gonna live and die. Is that that next phase for you? - Well, you and I are very similar to that too. I don't look at something and think it's unattainable. I look at my go, I've gotta work a little harder stuff, something I want or something I wanna do. And JCPenney was the perfect example, the collection which is suits and ties and everything you need to look sharp. Like, you know, when I'm on GMA, everything I wear there, Fox NFL Sunday, everything I wear is that. Everything the guys on Fox NFL Sunday wear is really my line. Yeah. And Troy Aikman and Tony Gonzalez, so it's really something. But the reason it's authentic to me, and I'm involved, so I'm just not a passive, you know, those fabrics. If you guys do it, put a suit out there, stamp my name in it and it's good. Oh, I look at every swatcher fabric, I look at every dress shirt, every tie, belts, shoes, socks, it's exhausting. But it's necessary because I know people who work really hard with me on that. And I want them to know that I'm as engaged as they are. And from the marketing of it to who we're gonna pick the model and ads, the direction of that. But for us, we were so happy because it was a start. It was a start. And I think we started maybe 200 stores just to get a little filler. I look back now and I think, wow, it's only been like a year. But we've been successful enough that we were 500 and then now we're going to 600, a year ahead of schedule. And then we kicked off MSX, which was like, you know, fleeces and casual and like athleisure wear. So we kicked off a whole other line with them. Athleisure? Athleisure. It has just completely evolved into this thing that is like, hey, why not? Why can't we, it's authentic to me. I don't do it not wear it. I don't do it and you don't see me in it. I'm in it every day. So I'd rather be authentic in everything that I do and everything that we do at the company with, we do that is authentic to whoever we are putting into position, including myself. That people can stand behind it because they know that's really you and that's important. - Yeah, there's, so a lot of entrepreneurs watch this show and there's two things you said there that I think are incredibly, incredibly important for entrepreneurs to understand. And that's one that you get, one of them defining characteristics of being an entrepreneur is dealing with the mundane. And if you believe in what you're doing enough to fight through the mundane, like if you look at this set, if you knew what we had to do to the fucking day, like it is like one tedious thing after another. I have, on pieces of this set, there is actually my blood because, but that's just right. - That's what you had to do to make it happen. - Right, so it's not like, wait, why am I painting this? It's, that's what we have to do. Why am I looking at this? Watch a fabric, that's what you have to do. It's like you have the vision, you believe in it enough, you're gonna see it through all the way to the end. And when I was painting, I thought, this is the part of being an entrepreneur that people don't understand. Like this is not what they think. They think of it kind of like fame, oh shit, you're boy, I know we gotta get you out of here, but you're boy Kevin Hart. So I'm assuming you've seen Laugh and My Pain. - Yes. - All right, so he has this quote, which I just-- - I went to, I actually went to the live concert and inserted into that film. He's phenomenal. - Dude, he's phenomenal. So I didn't know, I knew him as a comedian, that was it. At the beginning of the film version, they do that chant. Everybody wants to be famous, nobody wants to put the work in. Everybody wants to be famous, nobody wants to put the work in. And I was like, oh my God, Kevin Hart, like totally understands it. So I was blown away. And I was like, that guy's gonna last. And then you mentioned him in your book about being a guy who puts the work in and I thought, that's so true. - There are two guys that entertainment who I know put the work in.
The Importance Of Hard Work
How to put the work in (45:33)
And I respect them so much as Kevin and the Wayne Johnson, the Rock. - Yes. - Because I watch these two, and I study these two, and they're approached to everything that they do. And it's always joyful. It's always, they have so much energy and so much conviction about what they're doing and a belief. And I'm feeding off of them, even though I'm in a totally different business because it keeps me going to the point where they'll say, man, you work too hard. I'm like, I'm talking about it. You guys are working. So I think we all kind of feed off of each other to push each other, even though we're all in like different spaces sometimes to be successful, unbeknownst to the other sometimes. And I think that that is, you gotta have role models. You have to have people that you look up to that make you push yourself and make you want to be better. And when it comes to business and you talking about painting on this set and doing all these things, if you do something and your name is on it, your name is right there. If it's not successful, who's gonna get blamed for it, right? You. If it is successful, who's gonna get credit for it? You. And I found that if I'm going to get blamed for something 'cause it's happened before that, I didn't really put everything into it. - Yes. - I'm pissed that I'm being blamed for something failing because I didn't put all the work into it. But yet, for me, if I'm getting all the credit for being successful and I know I didn't put anything into it, I feel like a fraud. And you gotta put up with that for yourself and maybe some people are comfortable with that. I'm just not comfortable with that. So that's why all the business is I'd like to be a part of because I don't want to feel like a fraud. I want to, if someone asks me about it and I want to talk to you about it, I'm real. I don't have to make up some story and then go home and go, "Blasher, I have to lie about that." It's not a good feeling. So if you're gonna get blamed for failure, accept it. Hey, I put everything I had into it. It failed, move on to the next, but I know I busted my ass. And if you're getting credit and everybody getting credit for success, you can feel good because you truly have been a part of that too. And that's something that keeps me involved in everything. And like I said, the Rock and Kevin are like, "Bust your ass, bust your ass workers, man. I appreciate that." - And okay. - Like you. - Thank you. - All right, one last question. What's the impact you want to have on the world? - Hmm. - I don't know. - You know, the biggest thing for me to be honest with is just, it's like my kids, making them proud, letting them understand about hard work, respect for not, like not, give me respect, but how to respect people. And just to be nice people. And that's really my main focus is to, you know, make sure that when I'm gone, more people are happy that I was here and that they don't show up at the funeral to make sure I'm really dead. That's it. - That's awesome, man. - Thank you so much for coming. - Thank you, man. Such a love it. - Great time. - All right, guys, this is somebody that you are gonna want to dive into in a big way, you're gonna want to learn as much as you can. You are definitely gonna want to start by reading his book Wake Up Happy, which is the perfect title. He talks about happiness is not a test that you take once and then it's done. It's this ongoing pursuit and the real way that he talks about it from neurochemistry to all of the truths of the way that life is gonna knock you sideways and you've got to find a way to recalibrate and balance. And he talks about all the different steps and things that you can do and take to actually find that path to happiness and actually be somebody who wakes up happy and somebody who encounters a negative situation and has the tools, the things that he repeats in his head, the framework to view the world, that will actually help get you back on track. It is super powerful, you would love it. Watch his induction into the Hall of Fame speech. It is him in a nutshell from both the just joy of life to loving the sound that another grown man makes when you tackle him and he hear the breath, escaping his body. It's hilarious, you have to hear it. It's an amazing story. And guys, you can join Michael on Sunday, February 5th as NFL on Fox covers Super Bowl 51, live from Houston. Anytime this man is live, I'm trying to be there, see it, watch it, because he does everything with joy and authenticity. And for those of you who are about to write me and say you never said what the other thing was that he mentioned that's so powerful for an entrepreneur and it's authenticity and this guy has it from top to bottom in everything that he does and I will vouch for him on camera, off camera. It's exactly the same person and that's so fucking cool. - Thank you so much for being on the show Michael. - Thank you. - Thank you. - Thank you guys. Until next time my friends, if you haven't already, be sure to follow @TomBillYou and @ImpactTheory. That's the new bad boy, check it out, join us. Thank you guys so much and until next time, be legendary my friends, take care. Well done. - Thank you so much Matt. - A lot of pleasure, dude. - Hey everybody, thanks so much for joining us for another episode of Impact Theory. If this content is adding value to your life, our one ask is that you go to iTunes and Stitcher and rate review, not only does that help us build this community, which at the end of the day is all we care about, but it also helps us get even more amazing guests on here to show their knowledge with all of us. Thank you guys so much for being a part of this community and until next time, be legendary my friends.