Why Giving Everything Away Will Make You Rich | David Meltzer on Impact Theory | Transcription

Transcription for the video titled "Why Giving Everything Away Will Make You Rich | David Meltzer on Impact Theory".

1970-01-03T20:40:01.000Z

Note: This transcription is split and grouped by topics and subtopics. You can navigate through the Table of Contents on the left. It's interactive. All paragraphs are timed to the original video. Click on the time (e.g., 01:53) to jump to the specific portion of the video.


Beginning

Intro (00:00)

Manifesting is commanding, which means working with. The word work is in there. You gotta take action. You gotta make it happen. But I believe that it's very important to still think about it, focus in on it, dream about it. But without conscious action, it probably won't take place. - Hey everybody, welcome to Impact Theory.


Dave Meltzer And Key Success Concepts

Introducing Dave Meltzer (00:19)

Our goal with this show and company is to introduce you to the people and ideas that will help you actually execute on your dreams. All right, today's guest is the former CEO of the legendary Lee Steinberg Sports Agency and the co-founder and CEO of Sports One, arguably the most notable sports marketing firm in the world. He started with nothing and yet became a millionaire just nine months out of law school and a multi-millionaire by the time he was 32. But then he went broke. But then he made it all back again. And now he's an insanely successful serial entrepreneur and philanthropist who through hardship was forced to codify the rules of success. Since regaining his footing, he's written two, number one, best-selling books on the subject of success, connected to goodness and compassionate capitalism, a journey to the soul of business. He also shares his principles on his "Top Five iTunes Business Podcast," the playbook, one of his principles, find ways to serve others. To that end, everything that he and his business partner, Hall of Fame quarterback Warren Moon, do have a charitable component. And this rule has only accelerated their business growth. Through Sports One, they are currently involved in projects for many of the world's biggest sporting events, including the Super Bowl, the Pro Football Hall of Fame, the Masters and countless others. His passionate desire to help others pursue their potential has seen him lauded with countless awards, including being honored as one of Marshall Goldsmith's top 100 business coaches in the world and being named the chairman of the Unstoppable Foundation. So please, help me in welcoming the man that both Forbes and entrepreneur named one of the top keynote speakers on the planet, Variety Magazine's Sports Humanitarian of the Year, Dave Meltzer. - Thank you to introduce me all the time. - Dude, I'll walk around with you to be all good. That was awesome. Dude, thank you for all that you share, man. It's really crazy. Like, we're living in this really weird time where people are coming out, they're taking their time for no money to really share what they've learned and empower not only the next generation, but just anybody that's willing to listen and you've become an amazing voice in that. - Yeah, it's incredible. I think it has to do with faith. You know, when we talk about doing things for no money, I used to see things as a trade. So even giving, right? I'd give with an expectation of at least appreciation and it caused all types of difficulty, but for me now, I just have this real faith that if I'm of service, if I do well and I do the right things, that not necessarily just monetary wealth, but true purpose and fulfillment and wealth come to you more accurately. It reduces the resistance in my life. - I love that, especially in your story, because your story to me really is one of being able to rebuild. And so few people A, can do it and be the ones that can and have don't want to talk about it. And so how do you think about failure? How have you conceptualized in your mind, why are you so able to talk so openly about it? - You know, I did an interview with Ryan Lee for we were talking about big failures.


Mistakes And Losses (03:25)

And his failure was even more public in mind, but the number one shameful thing of losing everything in the most courageous thing was to face our mothers. - That's interesting. - You know, you talk about the public. And you know, I'd said today, I'd share of sliding up at my rancher Santa Fe home and moving trucks to take everything out. You know, 33 homes alone in San Diego, gone. A golf course, a ski mountain. So beyond my community and associates and all of this, and I was already working for Lee. This is from past transgressions. I was already on my path and journey of fulfillment, but the hardest thing was to walk through my mom's house and tell, oh, I get choked up. I had to tell her, not only did I fail myself, but I fell in front of me. I failed her. It was really, really tough. So that failure to me was the toughest part, you know? And so for me, all the other things were just learning experiences, but I had to get over the shame of that, you know, here they took my mom's house. My dream of getting rich was only to buy my mom's house in a car. That's, you know, I grew up with nothing. Six kids, single mom. So for me, to make it back, I was already on that journey and I felt as if I could stay in a place of giving and faith. And I mean faith in myself and faith in the universe, faith in others of service, that everything would come back to me and it did. - Dude, that's what I love is that, something that is that emotionally intense. You've talked really eloquently about, there was this weird delay, right? So I make all these mistakes, which end up costing me everything, but I'd already made the changes. And so as I'm hitting rock bottom, I've already found that moment of faith. I know that by giving and not expecting that I can really build something. So how did that interaction go with you and your wife? - Yeah, 'cause that was really the rock bottom that woke me up when you let someone bottom out, was my wife who I've adored since the fourth grade. I've known her since I was nine, who didn't adore me since the fourth grade. But, you know, when she told me she wasn't happy. And at that time, we had everything. You know, what you dream of as a poor kid, what you dream is probably as a rich kid. And so for her to straight out tell me that if I didn't straighten up, go back and take stock in who I was, that she was gonna take my three daughters and herself. And to me, that was rock bottom. She loves me now. But I honestly, when she did that, I was in shock. I was such an, excuse my language, A-hole, that I looked at my wife when she told me that. And I said, "Look around you, how can you not be happy?" And she said, "No, I'm looking at you. "That's why I'm not happy. "I don't care about the Ferraris and the porches "and the homes. "I'm looking at you." And that tore me up. - Yeah, I can fully understand that.


Lies And Humility (06:17)

What was it that she saw that she didn't like? - First she said I wasn't paying attention. - Which occurred to-- - To anything, right? I was someone that raised my vibration to be aware. And she felt as if I was always, you know, first of all, OCD, like most successful people. So I was on top of every little thing. And so number one, I wasn't paying attention. And two, I was surrounding myself with the wrong people and the wrong ideas. And I was lying to myself, and that's where she told me to go take stock in myself. And what are some of the wrong ideas? The wrong ideas were mostly about the value, my values. The idea were based on two things that I had lost control of. "One was my ego." All of a sudden I had a need to be right, a need to be offended, a need to be separate, a need to be inferior, a need for guilt, all of these different needs of the ego that as I was rising up, that I was completely humble. And all of these needs of the egos turned me into a self-entitled, you know, a-hole who literally was only concerned on what I could get. And when I went back and took stock in myself and saw that there was these four values, actually taught by my mom that were missing, that lost the radical humility that made me successful. And what are the four values? The first was gratitude. I was so happy. We had nothing. I was just like this grateful kid. You know, "Oh, thank you so much for whatever it was." And I had lost my gratitude's perspective. My past all of a sudden wasn't so great. My present wasn't that good and my future wasn't bright anymore. I had lost gratitude. Just because how you were thinking about it. Yeah, my perspective. And then another one was empathy. I was a very forgiving person. And all of a sudden I put myself in this ego-competitive world that I was taking and I felt, you know, this need to be offended all the time and separate and inferior and superior. So I learned empathy and forgiveness again. Then accountability was a big one. The accountability issue, I went to a level of blame, shame, and justification. Everything was everyone else. I was Midas. Right? How could I make a mistake? I blame shame and justification. My mom from a time I was a little kid taught me to, "Don't live below the line. Live in accountability." Two questions to ask. What did I do to attract it to my life and what am I supposed to learn from it? And I lost that. And then finally, really weird one, most people get confused, effective communication. I'm a great communicator. I motivate people. I can talk and unite people in one. You know, team captain on my football team. That kind of guy. But what I really lost was to effectively communicate with what inspired me. I had lived an inspired life, which made me not work a day, made people love me, raise my vibration, and I lost the idea to communicate and live an inspired life. I remember when I built my home in Rancho Santa Fe. It's in my book. I had this weird feeling that I lied in bed when it was done the first night and my words in my mouth were, "Oh shit. Like I didn't know what to do. Like I've gone for surpass my own imagination and fulfillment and inspiration that I didn't know really so I just started buying things. It didn't make me happy. I bought more things that make me happy, bought different things, didn't make me happy until I went of service." And the funny thing is, I wish I would have done it when I had a lot to give at that time and I didn't have to build it back up. But everyone goes through the lessons that they learned for a purpose and a reason.


Stop projecting inferiority. (10:00)

Now, one thing you were talking about, and I've never heard anybody else say, you said I had a need to be offended and a need to be inferior. What do you mean by that? Number one, when you feel superior, it's usually a direct projection of your insecurity. And so I was projecting my feeling that I was inferior to other people that no matter how much money that I made in the successes I had, when I met other people like you that are so successful, I had this energy like I wasn't good enough. I lived in a world of not good enough and then I would do things to buy grace or buy appreciation. I'm with my mom and almost ruined my relationship because I put her standard on her of appreciation. I'd buy her house or buy her extravagant gifts and all she really wanted was my love and appreciation. But I felt offended because people didn't do this or didn't show up to my party here. I wasted so much energy. So interesting because I only know you on this side of it, right? It's that shot. So it's so hard to see. But it drives me nuts when people look at me like that, right? And isolation not see that it's a journey and that you grow and change through all of this. But it's really incredible to know that somebody can get here at this state where you're so at ease, you've created so much success, you've helped so many people, it's really incredible. And this is what I figured out through my journey that I was always great at providing a void and I'd feel it. But the void that I created usually was promises that I made and I worked really hard to do and instead of work really hard up front to provide value, create that void. And then what I got really good at was getting rid of the ego guilt and I learned to ask big, right? I learned to ask like attract someone like Tom in my life so that I could sit and reach millions of people with him and inspire them to help other people and learn that when you give the universe doesn't know size. So it knows I believe that it's just as good for somebody to put a cart back at the grocery store or pick up trash and throw it away or provide a healthy food to somebody that it is to give a million dollars. The universe, it's not, these are human things. This is a lower, and so you might as well do as many good deeds as you can, open as many doors, smile as many people, hug as many people as you can. And then when you create your void of giving and service, ask big. That's in this human vibration, this pragmatic world, ask big, ask for it all because it will come to you. And that's, I think something I did subconsciously when I was 25 right out of law school and it's something I do consciously, subconsciously and unconsciously now, I asked to empower 75,000 people. I want to change the world to make people happy. And who are you asking that of the universe? So whatever you believe in, whatever you believe in, I don't care if it's God Jesus, Muhammad Joseph Smith, the 12th man if you're a Seahawks man, I don't care. But ask, ask the universe, ask who you think, put it out there. You know, there's three ways you got what you think saying do. That's one way to put it out there. Subconsciously, there are no pathways in your mind. 40,000 of the same thoughts, put it out there. And then finally your energy, your DNA, your fingerprint on life, that's what truly puts it out there. And that system of conscious to subconscious to unconscious is what allows you to truly attract rapidly and accurately what you want. So interesting because I'm guessing if we flashback, let's call it 20 years and I asked the same question, I get an equally valid answer because it worked, right? Like both worked. Work hard. You would have got work hard. Don't quit. You know, all of those things. And look, be of God. I was an honest person. I just had my values a little bit screwed up as they got bigger and bigger. But I was, you know, working really hard. I just felt like I was in control of everything and now I've completely surrendered. Because I mean, I don't work as hard. I'm just going to say, I watch your content and there's definitely like you said, I'm going to ballpark it here, but like, I don't go to bed, I pass out and I work until my energy runs out. And I thought, yeah, I get that. And so it's so interesting to see. Yeah, not a conflict at all actually. It's just, it's such an interesting way to come at it. So you've got the, on the one hand, it's the more traditional hard driving. You know, I'm going to make this happen. If I'm creating a void, it's a void of what I'm looking for people to, you know, pour into. Hey, I've given you something, I'm expecting something back. And many, many, many, a person have built insanely amazing careers doing that, right? So I know that it works. But then over here now you've done both and it's like this totally different way, but yet you still really pour yourself into what you do. Provided value. Yeah, it's super interesting. So like I was watching one of your pieces of content. You went to this event and it was during spring break. And so there was only, you know, I don't know, a handful, 30 kids there or something. And you said, oh, these are the ones that'll make it. Why are they the ones that'll make it?


Definition of the consistency that makes people successful. (15:01)

You know, I believe in being more interested than interesting and that providing value that define that for people. I know what you mean, but like really put a point on it. You know, for me, we, we, it's almost connected to the zero effective life. And I think there's a consistency that makes people successful. And what happens is we lie to ourselves and I'll use health because you're an expert at it. But I see this in nutrition and in exercise. People will tell me after one month, gosh, why did I get incremental results or no results at all? I said, because you zeroed yourself out. The kids that showed up during spring break to the event that I had that the ones that were there and they had a lot of other distractions, they're the ones that don't zero out. They're the ones that get the exponential power of the universe. Meaning if I do something every day, day one, I get X to the first day two to the second, third, third, fourth, fifth, most people when it comes to nutrition, they're always day six. They zero themselves out. Then they start over for a second and during a month, they may zero themselves out three or four times. At the end of the month, they didn't get the exponential results. If you stick to something every day, this idea of being more interested, really asking the extra questions, going the extra mile, which is completely empty, in my opinion. If you want no competition in your life, go the extra mile. 99.9% of the people are zeroing themselves out. They're doing 28 days a month, not 31. How do you help them with that? I'm a psycho for this, the level of clarity that you have to have.


Student of Your Calendar (16:36)

You know, I start very pragmatically. I have certain things that I think can change someone's life. Number one, student of your calendar. It might sound silly, but I believe focused, there's a whole field of intention and that the pragmatic way that we figure out what we're doing in a day, because I look for productivity and accessibility. I study my calendar. On the way here, I was studying my things, your awareness rise. When you're looking at something and start thinking, "All right, I'm going to be with Tom. What should I ask Tom? This is all being more interested than." Then it goes from there and then another quick philosophy is do it now. Whenever I'm doing anything, I have a simple question, "Can I do it now?" Because if I can do something now, number one, I save myself a minimum of half the time. It'll take me twice as much time to do something if I don't do it now. And two, exponentially it becomes less successful if you don't do something now. You can forget it. You have to go back. I mean, it just turns into a mess. So about 85 to 88% of the things that I'm approached with, I can do now. Hey, you got a referral. Yeah, hold on. Sometimes it's a little weird and quirky during the meeting, but I do it anyway. Someone asked me, "I literally make the introduction. I cut our conversation. Hey, you need to know this guy." And so these little tips of time, and then the other side, so I give time tips because I believe time's a construct. Everybody has 24 hours a day. It's how productive and accessible can you be in 24 hours. And then the other construct is ego. So the two ways I help them is I teach them gratitude, empathy, accountability, and effective communication to help them get out of their own way because that ego in time will be two things that will reduce all the resistance in their lives and allow them to attract what they want. And if you understand ego and you understand time, you can have faith to be of service.


Ego (18:27)

So help me understand ego. How does it stop most people? Ego is that voice, that little voice inside of you that I use, cancel, clear, connect for, that it's all these needs. You know, guilt is a big one. Fear is a huge one. Anxiety. So when I can teach young people to identify when they're thinking with their ego, when they're in their own way, there's only one thing that stands between you and what you want. And when I say what you want, let me be very clear. I believe that all people want is to be happy. And in order to make them happy, if they get what they want, health, money, a Ferrari, now it won't maintain the happiness if you get what you want. But the key is if you can rapidly get everything that you want, learn from it, keep what keeps you happy, dump what doesn't, and then keep moving on, you're going to live a happy existence, a fulfilled existence. So the ego is the only thing that stands between you and what you want. And when we can identify it, which is the first step, we can start working through why do we feel this way? That's one of the biggest questions that I ask. I still get scared. You know, I still fight certain things. I don't know what percentage of the time anymore, but I just try to get better. I try to pursue my potential of living at the highest vibration of the truth without my ego, you know, still to, I mean, every time I talk to my mom, I fight my ego because it's such an emotional relationship. I fight my ego of all different things that probably carried from the time I was in the womb. But energetically, the more I work through it and the better I feel, the more I'm able to manifest not only for myself but for others. And so I've heard what you've said about your mom that she has a third degree black belt in Jewish guilt. So knowing that, what does it mean to work through it? Is it finding your center? Is it just having the compassion for her, understanding that she only wants good things for you? And this is just her best attempt. Because I know there are so many people watching this that they have the same relationship. So what do they do mechanistically? What do they do to work through it?


Working Through (20:33)

So what I started doing is I realized that there's only two things my mom really wanted from me. One was to know that I loved her and to appreciate her. That's my mother. And I got that by asking her questions. And so what I decided to do to change our relationship was to make sure every day. So I have this philosophy of doing stuff every day. Give it a minimum amount of minutes. So I gave my mom a minimum of one minute a day to make sure that she loves and appreciates me. And meaning I would call text her email her and simply sometimes say, "Hey mom, I was just thinking about you. I got back from China today and I just wanted you to know that I totally love you and appreciate you. I live this extraordinary life and I'm so grateful. You know, I'm one of six and all the things. Then I work through it and say to myself, "Why do I still feel this way? Why do I feel inferior to my siblings just because they all went to the Ivy Leagues and none of them got a B?" "I'm 50 years old. I have my own beautiful family. Why do I have this energy about me that I literally know? It's not easy for people to say the truth that I know and here's the best thing about it. My brothers are super. They're super accelerated like humans. They're amazing. Harvard, summa cum laude, amazing. What's funny is my brother went to Harvard. He was extremely enlightened. He's a rabbi now. I said to him, "Hey man, I'm working on feeling good around you." He was like, "Pail." He goes, "That's funny because I was thinking the same thing about you." That in fear and I hope you take it as a compliment because I just think the world of you and I want you to think the world of me. Those type of effective communications can open up and allow you to work through why you feel certain ways because it transcends. If you feel that way through your siblings or your parents, it's worse for people you just met. You're trying to prove yourself. One of the energies I carry that ruined me was I had an energy that I was stupid and I projected it that I was smarter than everyone else because I carried a core energy because of my siblings and the way I was raised and my grandma telling me only stupid people get bored, smart people think of things to do that I literally projected this insecurity that caused me to oversell, back end sell, lie, manipulate and not feel good about myself. No matter how much I had, I still needed more. It was for myself to prove that I was smart enough.


Taking accountability (22:59)

That's so incredible. How did you get to the point where you could take accountability for all of that? That is, I love your thoughts on accountability, by the way, extraordinary. What I find is the people that can take accountability often have to really overcome something like that thing they really don't want to talk about and they still have to take accountability for that. How did you face that? It was taking accountability for going bankrupt because to me, everything in my life was about being rich. It was about having that money. That whole identity was that success. To let go of that identity and to be radically humble and confident and faithful and just say, "I am accountable." It was a bad time that I went bankrupt. It was 2007, 2008. Everybody was losing money. People were blaming me and there's lawsuits and my ego is in the way. In the minute I said, "Hey, you know what? I could have done this." I attracted this. Yes, my wonderful wife is correct. I just wrote myself with the wrong people and the wrong ideas. I'm accountable 100 percent and I'm going to tell everybody about it. I'm not going to hide. You know what? Take the energy. There's a great author, David Corbin. He wrote a book called Illuminate and I read that book and he became a friend of mine because I had to search him out after I read it. He used an example about illumination. He said, "I was doing business and there was a guy that was convicted of a white-collar crime, felony." First thing of every business call that he said, he said, "Look, before we get started, I want to let you know I was convicted in 2001 of a white-collar crime for doing this. I'd served six months in jail. I'm completely accountable for it, but I learned what I learned and I just want to tell you upfront before we do any business that this is me and if you're not comfortable doing business with a felon, I get it." 90% of the people trusted that person more than somebody else. And then two, you know 100% of the people, especially because of technology and access to information today, eventually you're going to find out and you lose 100% of the people when they find out after. For me, that was a friend of mine who said, "I love this, David. I would rather people hate me for who I am than love me for who I'm not. I'm the exact opposite of you." I love that when he told me that. And that was a part I wanted everyone to love me and you can't. Yeah, that's easier said than done. That's really, really interesting. And doing the work of identifying it like you were talking about, whether it's ego or what it is, but just recognizing that it's there and then being able to process through that, find your center and then move forward with intentions. Really, really interesting. And as I think through that and I think through the steps and how meticulous you have to be, why are you such a good negotiator? What is it that you do? Is there a process like that? Like what is it? I think it's part of being more interested than interesting. So what I do is I explore the reasons that you want what you want. I want to explore the impact that it has and the capabilities that you currently have, that you want to have and that you actually need. And then I align those with the reasons that I want to do the deal, the impact that it has for me and the capabilities that I have want or need. And when I figure that all out in negotiation, I actually can make a bigger hole than other people. I'm dealing, hey, I could give you this. You could give me that. And we both really win. From things that I've heard you say almost just off the cuff, the thing that seems like you're super power from the outside is that you go into everything with an open mind, not knowing what the answer might be and looking for ways that are completely outside the realm of even what I would think to ask for. And is part of what is anybody's power in the negotiation being able to make the ask? Yeah. So there's three things. One, people buy on emotion for logical reasons. So you have to address the emotions. And so that's that open nature that you feel and see from knowing me now. The other two is not only an ask, it's an attract. So I believe there's four mediums that you can ask an attract on, the first in person. So being more interested than interesting, we were going to meet in person today. I know that I strategically, for the benefit of both of us, have asked and attracts. One of those simple asks was, I really wanted you to sign something to put into my studio. Because everyone I do, that's just a simple one. But I'm thinking about that. So in person ask an attract, then on the phone, every phone call I receive, not push out. I'm on the defensive in my life. I'm attracting. I'm allowing things. So I know that I'm going to receive phone calls today. I'm going to have ask an attracts. And I know that because unconditionally I ask people, is there anything I can do for you? How can I be of service? And they'll either tell me or not. And invariably they're almost forced to by the laws of nature to ask me what I want. I have an ask and attract.


Leveraging meditation (28:20)

Talk to me about meditation. How are you leveraging that in your life? Meditation for me is 20 minutes every morning. First thing that I do. And what it does is it finds my center. That's all for me. It's almost like baseline testing for a concussion. Because what I've learned is that life is like the big tall hill in San Francisco with a car on top. That's your center when the car is up there. You can hold it, you know, a truck you can hold with your finger when it's sitting on top of a hill. The minute this thing starts rolling downhill, you got to put it back up. The longer it goes downhill, the harder it is to get back up. What I used to do during the day is I let that truck keep flying down the hill and trying to react instead of act by going back to center. And is this emotional? That's how I think of it. I think of it as anxiety, stress, emotion. Those are the things I'm trying to bring back to center. Correct. So anything that takes you off of peace, oneness, wholeness that feel peaceful feeling, if something moves me in that direction, instead of reacting, talking, yelling, all the different things that are throwing things, whatever you are, go back to center. So you had this really cool story about, hey, my daughter at the time, I think she was 16, she said that I want a Ferrari, you'd be like, cool, how do we go about getting it?


Becoming a Manifesting Pragmatic (29:31)

And I found that really interesting because it's so pragmatic. But what I want to do now is really collide the two things because I think you're uniquely capable. Like you live in the real world, you've built real businesses and been very successful and there's so much tangibility to what you do. And maybe this will be a breakthrough for me. I want to know how those two coexist. How do you manifest, which I imagine just means essentially daydream, right? And then how do I reg so that then I have to go do something for it? That's the biggest conflict that I had too. People told me about manifesting. I'd roll my eyes because I didn't understand it. Manifesting is commanding, which means working with the word work is in there. You got to take action. You got to make it happen. You can't sit at home, high on your mom's couch manifesting the publisher's clearing house to come to your door. It would drive me crazy. It's a secret. I'm on to transformational leadership council. I'm like the most pragmatic sports agent weirdo on there. But those are all the people that created the movie The Secret. And I told them, throw me crazy when the guys, you're teaching the masses, sit there and dream about your Ferrari. And this was during my transformational time. And I sat there, it's put a pit in my stomach. I'm like, do you know how hard I had to work to buy my Ferrari? Like it was a dream of mine. I was out working and doing all the things that I needed. That combination to me, the commanding, the commanding of the universe, working with it. And that includes working with others. So I only, even in my business, ask me, you want to go to do something? You want to come to the studio today and get involved and meet you? Because there's, you know, I saw the posse that came. That's because they ask, okay, how are we going to do it? What value are you going to bring to the table? Oh, I can drive. I can do this. The same works with the universe. You know, I want to raise a hundred million dollars to give the people. And I hear the universe tell me, okay, how are we going to do it? Now it takes action. Takes alignment, action, adjustment. But it does. It takes, I have to create a plan. I'm not just going to dream about it. But I believe that it's very important to still think about it, focus in on it, dream about it. That all these things, the conscious, subconscious, and unconscious all work together. But without conscious action, it probably won't take place. Talk to me about planning.


Create a Plan & Stay on Course (32:01)

How do you come up with a plan? How have you, like this is the thing when I really sit down and try to break down for people, what you need to do to be successful. There's certain places I stop because there's nothing universal to give them. And the plan is one of them, right? So I'm just ridiculously psycho about people need a goal, a hyper-specific goal and a plan. So my thing is identify the gap between where you are and where you want to be. And that gap is a gap of skill set. And now you have to go and get those skills. But most people can't identify what skills actually lie between where they are and where they want to go. They get it from the end result, but they don't know how to plan that out. And I don't even understand other than just sort of buy intuition how I'm doing it. So here's what's cool. This is going to throw you way back because it's completely pragmatic monetary solution to the problem that I tell young people with what they want that they need to figure out one, a direct path to that. That's your goal. What's my direct path to revenue? Forget the business side. If you have an idea for a business specifically, what's my direct path to revenue? And when you stay focused on the direct path to revenue, you only need one more thing to stay in business every day. And so if you have one objective to stay in business, and then two, a direct path to revenue and understand that my job is to align with as much as I can, being more interested than interested in learning these skills, knowledge, and maintaining desire, you're guaranteed success. Let me give you one of the coolest things that I've learned. And this is about anything in life. If somebody could tell you, give me your dream and your 25 knows from your dream. 25 failures, losses from your dream. How excited would you be when you got the first no? Way. Way. How about when you get your 25th one? That'd be over the nine. But for me, this is where faith comes in. I believe that I live in the favor, like in the favor of the universe. I believe that everything is mine. There's enough of everything for everyone. I just truly believe it. And I don't know if it's 25, but I know it's the same philosophy. So I take on the energy and perspective of, hmm, good news, first failure. I was wrong again. Good news. And then the 25th comes and like, oh gosh, I know I'm closer than I was. This is great. We're like so many people cannot maintain desire and they get to the 25th time and they're this far away. You know, the don't quit poem. I love that poem because that explains this perfectly. You're done. Man, you're going to get there. I don't know how long my favorite book I was blessed to do a book with Jack Canfield. Bacon soup for the soul, half a billion. He was rejected 200 times, my publisher. Said it was a stupid idea. 200. But if I told him that he would be rejected 200 times before he had the best-selling book of all times and a half a billion sold in a whole brand that laughs for legacy of a lifetime of people, how happy would he have been when he got to 150? And so to me, to teach people, you need skills, integration of skills, knowledge, and desire, maintenance of desire. You need a direct path to what you want, but you need to stay on course every day. It's every single day. The only thing that stops you from being successful in business, for example, is you run out of money. You go out of business. How many businesses do we know that have evolved? I'm sure your business is evolved from where you started. Right? I know Google did. Facebook did. Right? They all were not set out to be, but they all had a direct path to what they wanted to do and they stayed in business every day. How do you maintain desire?


Preserving Motivation And Dealing With Failure

Maintain Desire (35:43)

I've wanted to ask that from the second you said that. That's super powerful. It's literally to me, it's the consistent, persistent enjoyment of the pursuit of my potential. When my outcomes, I have goals. People are all the time, well, how can you do that? But I change my goals that are a little different. They don't create voids and shorts and obstacles. Meaning, someone will tell me, I want to be a millionaire by the time I'm 30. I say, can I give you a piece of advice? Why not double the amount of money you make as fast as you can? You're not playing with linear time anymore. Time's a construct. What if you made it way before 30? You've cheated yourself. You're creating resistance. So, for me to stay inspired, it's every day enjoying the pursuit of my potential and truly focusing in on, man, I love that. My real enlightenment came when I got my butt kicked and walked out of there going, wow, that was awesome. Where no ego, right? It's just like, I just learned so much. I must be so much closer to what I want because I just learned a ton. And I guess I got my butt kicked. And where the old David would have been like, he doesn't know anything. No, I don't know anything. And I'm here to learn more. Yeah, that's really interesting.


Made By Our No's (36:56)

Another thing that you've said that I think is really powerful is we are made by our nose. What do you mean by that? Along with the 25-0 opportunity is that we're also made by the people that we say no to. And sometimes we're asked a lot by family, friends, associates, community. We have to be able to say no. Now along with my how philosophy, people say, well, how is that not in conflict with how? Well, because I can say no to you, but I challenge myself to be of service. So if I can help you, who can I find to help you? Part of my business model is an extreme channel of understanding how many requests are made of me and what I can and can't do, my capabilities and being able to have resources to help other people as well. So people ask to borrow money from me all the time. You probably have it on yours. Hey, you're a service, man. You're the most, look, more than happy to help you find out. You don't need a loan from me. I'm not a bank, but I can show you 20 different ways that you can get to your objective without me giving you a handout. And the worst thing you can do is try to please everybody and say yes to everybody. You're made by the people you say no to. It's really interesting. All right, before I ask my last question, tell these guys where they can find you online. If I'm online at David Meltzer, this is probably the best place, Dave Meltzer, it's dot com, really easy, but at David Meltzer, Instagram is probably the best place, or just Google David Meltzer. Fortunately, the other famous David Meltzer, the beatnik poet died, so I'm the only one alive that's really there. Makes that easy.


Influencing The World

Impact on the World (38:42)

Cool. Well, my last question is what's the impact that you want to have on the world? Really simple. You know, I want to empower others to empower others to be happy. If I can empower others to teach others to be happy, I get that exponential result. If I can teach a thousand people to teach a thousand people, that's a million. Right? It just expands. So I'm trying to get messages out there. Notice one difference about my content is I don't sell anything. And I don't think I'll ever will. The only thing I'm selling you is methodology, pragmatic, spiritual methodology of how to be happy, but more importantly, to take complex issues, try to make them simple enough. So not only does it make you happy, but you could tell somebody else, "Hey man, if you just say thank you before you go to bed and when you wake up, your whole life will change." Bam. That's what I'm here for. I love that. David, thank you so much. Guys, you are going to be hard pressed to find anybody that is more real, more vulnerable, more honest, more effective at building businesses, creating the kind of abundance that you want in your life. And I'm going to explain it because, like he said, he had to go through it all over again. He rose and would not have been able to explain how he did it the first time. He crashed, had to codify it so that he could teach it to himself if nobody else. And then that became something that he could pass on to other people. And that is when people get really profound, is when they have a deep understanding, not just an intuitive sense of how to do it, but a deep understanding that they can articulate. So his hopes of teaching a thousand people to teach a thousand people who will hopefully teach a thousand more, I think is very, very plausible. And as you dive into his world and see the amount of stuff that he will give away to you off the cuff, for free, it is absolutely astonishing. This is somebody who truly leads with service. The first time we met, literally didn't know him and he was just, "Hey, how can I help? What can I do?" It's so disarming and so beautiful and so incredible. And we watched the beginning of this episode. That is a moment. It might be the most giving moment of all the things that he tried to give in the way of advice, just showing the raw emotion around his mom and how hard that was for him was so moving to me. That in and of itself is a gift. So I promise, as you dive deeper, you will be rewarded with an avalanche of amazingly usable insights that will help you feel better. It will help you find your center and go and do the things that you want to do. All right. If you haven't already, be sure to subscribe. And until next time, my friends, be legendary. Take care. Thank you very much. I really appreciate it coming off. Hey everybody. Thank you so much for watching and being a part of this community. If you haven't already, be sure to subscribe. You're going to get weekly videos on building a growth mindset, cultivating grit, and unlocking your full potential.


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